Is it poly if you haven't met anyone yet?

[Somegeezer]

Definitely the ability to love more for me. I was single when I joined you guys and realised who I was. Even now, I'm only with one partner. But I still say I'm polyamorous.

[naughty]

For me it's the ability to love more than one person.

[River]

Originally Posted by AnnabelMore

You can always use Dan Savage's turn of phrase and call a newly opened relationship "monogamish". ^_^

Except Mr. Savage didn't have love in mind, but sex in mind, when he coined that term. And poly is centrally about love and only peripherally about sex.

[trueRiver]

Consider a traditional "save myself till I am married" person. Are they monogamous on the morning of their wedding day? They haven't "done it" yet, but I would argue they are already mono.

When a couple I knew in the late 70s got married, they refused to use the line in the service about "holding myself only unto him/her" as they were sure they would not keep to it. They were quite happy to keep in the "to death do us part" bit. I consider they were already poly-ish at that point, even tho at the time theirs was an exclusive relationship: in their heads they were already open to an open marriage.

So yes: you can be poly and be currently with only one partner, or even like myself with none.

River~~

NB: Not the same River as posted immediately before this: we have two folk on these forums with the same exquisite taste in chosen names

[polandrylady]

I think you knew what you were looking for in the "micro signs" and perhaps saw it before the couple saw it themselves. I would say a lot of people aren't conscious about what they are feeling and thinking until later on. I have delayed understanding in a lot of topics in life.

Few would realize the MMF over the other way too!

Did you keep in contact with them? How did things progress from the 70s forward.... its certainly been long enough

Originally Posted by trueRiver

Consider a traditional "save myself till I am married" person. Are they monogamous on the morning of their wedding day? They haven't "done it" yet, but I would argue they are already mono.

When a couple I knew in the late 70s got married, they refused to use the line in the service about "holding myself only unto him/her" as they were sure they would not keep to it. They were quite happy to keep in the "to death do us part" bit. I consider they were already poly-ish at that point, even tho at the time theirs was an exclusive relationship: in their heads they were already open to an open marriage.

So yes: you can be poly and be currently with only one partner, or even like myself with none.

River~~

NB: Not the same River as posted immediately before this: we have two folk on these forums with the same exquisite taste in chosen names