Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 08-04-2011, 08:21 PM
JameeDee's Avatar
JameeDee JameeDee is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Blue Ridge Mountains, NC
Posts: 55
Red face More women, more PMS

Pinky1223 and I are discussing the monthly cycle of our relationship.

We've discovered a pattern

Fights always seem to come up about 2 days before she or I start our periods. Duh!

Problem is, we don't always recognize the signs...until 2 days later, when Aunt Flo shows up.

Then we feel bad for being bitchy and hormonal.

So, this month, Pinky (being the bestest girlfriend ever) recognized the signs of my PMS and sprung into action!

First: She recommended I take a xanax. I complied.
Next: She took Poppa aside and explained to him that he was not to try to be funny, or cute, or sexy, or even speak...really, for the next 48 hours.
Then: She had the same talk with my son, and made sure his chores were done before I got home
Finally: She cooked my favorite comfort foods (Meatloaf & Mac n' Cheese), kept the children away from me, and let me go to bed early.

I love my girlfriend!

I woke up in a great mood the next day!

Anyone else have any tips or tricks for handling "that time of the month," when there is more than one female in the relationship?
__________________
still trying to figure it all out...

Married Bi-female in a poly-fi triad with Girlfriend Pinky1223 and Hubby - Poppa
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 08-05-2011, 03:59 PM
Castalia's Avatar
Castalia Castalia is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: PDX
Posts: 177
Default

no tips really, just wanted to say that I think that's adorable
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-05-2011, 06:35 PM
Magdlyn's Avatar
Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Metro West Massachusetts
Posts: 3,773
Default

Another idea would be for both of you to mark the first day of your periods on a prominent calendar in your house... actually I think all women should do that.
__________________
Love withers under constraint; its very essence is liberty. It is compatible neither with envy, jealousy or fear. It is there most pure, perfect and unlimited when its votaries live in confidence, equality and unreserve. -- Shelley

me: Mags, 59, living with:
miss pixi, 37
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-05-2011, 07:36 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 7,423
Default

Xanax, really? Isn't that for anxiety? Seems extreme to me.

But then again, I never suffered from what they call PMS and I object to referring to anything associated with women's natural functions as a syndrome.

I would think, rather than medicating, why not just plan on pampering yourselves and/or each other? Bubble baths, massages, meditation, go swimming, a nice walk in nature, that kind of stuff.
__________________
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-05-2011, 08:17 PM
SourGirl's Avatar
SourGirl SourGirl is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: South of an Igloo, North of a Desert.
Posts: 885
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
Xanax, really? Isn't that for anxiety? Seems extreme to me.

But then again, I never suffered from what they call PMS and I object to referring to anything associated with women's natural functions as a syndrome.

I would think, rather than medicating, why not just plan on pampering yourselves and/or each other? Bubble baths, massages, meditation, go swimming, a nice walk in nature, that kind of stuff.
Ditto. To all.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-05-2011, 08:21 PM
TruckerPete TruckerPete is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 999
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
Another idea would be for both of you to mark the first day of your periods on a prominent calendar in your house... actually I think all women should do that.
The men-folk have jokingly requested I mark my period on the house calendar ... At least, I think they were joking.
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-05-2011, 08:27 PM
SNeacail's Avatar
SNeacail SNeacail is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2010
Location: Near Disneyland
Posts: 1,647
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
I would think, rather than medicating, why not just plan on pampering yourselves and/or each other? Bubble baths, massages, meditation, go swimming, a nice walk in nature, that kind of stuff.
Some of us do get extreme emotional swings and all the pampering in the world doesn't help. The medicating isn't for others, it can be necessary to function. While I don't resort to the prescription strength stuff, I do need more than just a hot bath.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 08-05-2011, 08:43 PM
Carma's Avatar
Carma Carma is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 478
Default

There is a novel called The Red Tent (great read!) set in Biblical times (OT) where the women would have to go into a tent during their menstrual cycles, kind of like they were quarantined (likely some religious thing, they were "unclean" or some such nonsense).... but ironically it was there and then that the women had some wonderful bonding times!

I think it's so sweet how you two look out for each other.
__________________
Formerly married to Sundance
Boyfriend -- Butch Cassidy
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 08-05-2011, 09:06 PM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 7,423
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Carma View Post
. . . they were quarantined (likely some religious thing, they were "unclean" or some such nonsense).... but ironically it was there and then that the women had some wonderful bonding times!
There were also cultures that believed women were holy (medicine women) and were closer to their inner wisdom during their "moon times." Separating them from the rest of the clan/tribe/community was a way of honoring the deep processes they underwent each month. They would wear rags and menstrual blood was considered magical. It was a time of prayer and introspection, and they would come back with more wisdom to share with the tribe.
__________________
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia "

An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 08-06-2011, 03:37 AM
openbj's Avatar
openbj openbj is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: OK, USA (but our hearts remain in TX)
Posts: 102
Default

I can relate!! Except that it's just me, the only female in the house. I was feeling snappy and angry and sad and jealous and, well, every emotion under the sun yesterday. But, I actually caught myself this time and recognized it for what it was instead of lashing out at J (like I really wanted to). I held it all in and kept it in check. We had a great date night as a result

This morning, yep, Mother Nature calling! I wasn't happy about it, but I was proud of myself for recognizing why I was feeling the way I was and not letting it control me. Now if I could just do this every month J would think I was Superwoman or something, fighting the forces of evil hormones!!
__________________
Married 12 1/2 years. Female. Straight. New to poly.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
advice, fights, funny, hormones, pms

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 08:55 PM.