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  #31  
Old 07-17-2011, 04:57 AM
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Originally Posted by openbj View Post
A: So who is this is other person?
Me: Do you really want to know?
A: Do I know her?
Me: Yes, very well. Yes, very well.
Are you certain she knows you were talking about her?
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  #32  
Old 07-17-2011, 05:03 AM
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I'm pretty sure. But I do plan to spell it out later after she's had some time to cool and chew. I had planned on telling her that it was her last night when we were talking like that, but she never responded back and logged off.
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  #33  
Old 07-17-2011, 03:47 PM
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She is not happy. She text him today and told him, "We've been friends for quite a while now, I really enjoy our friendship and care about you, but I cannot stand by and support your decisions lately, especially when you know they are wrong." Except, we know that they're not wrong. I don't know.
Hey BJ,

Ok - maybe I haven't had enough coffee yet.....but....

What are these 'decisions' she's making reference to ? Opening your marriage ? Ethical non-monogamy ?

Where is the 'wrong' that everyone supposedly knows/agrees to coming from ? Or in this case I should say 'disagrees' ... Is this something caught up in some religious context?

GS
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  #34  
Old 07-17-2011, 04:42 PM
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Hey BJ,

Ok - maybe I haven't had enough coffee yet.....but....

What are these 'decisions' she's making reference to ? Opening your marriage ? Ethical non-monogamy ?

Where is the 'wrong' that everyone supposedly knows/agrees to coming from ? Or in this case I should say 'disagrees' ... Is this something caught up in some religious context?

GS
Yes, she is having a difficult time overcoming the teachings of the church, which are inaccurate to the teachings of Scripture. She believes that we are making a moral and ethical mistake. She asked me for proof from the Bible that God is not anti poly, which I gave her a couple, but she has refused to really take them in so far.
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  #35  
Old 07-18-2011, 03:39 AM
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Well, it got spelled out to her tonight. Because my husband is poly and I'm okay with that and am now ready to let him be who he is, he doesn't love me like a husband should (her opinion). She stands very strongly that a marriage is one man and one woman and that if you marry the right person, it will work out to be just that way. Now, she's trying to talk me into leaving him because in her mind, I shouldn't have to deal with this. Yeah, she's not going to work as a poly. So, I guess we just try to mend the friendship or just let her walk away at this point?
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  #36  
Old 07-18-2011, 03:48 AM
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Just let her walk away now; mend the friendship later.

Other people will say this to you in lots more words.
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  #37  
Old 07-18-2011, 07:56 AM
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Originally Posted by NeonKaos View Post
Just let her walk away now; mend the friendship later.

Other people will say this to you in lots more words.
Yep.
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  #38  
Old 07-18-2011, 12:51 PM
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Her hypocrisy is actually kind of stunning. Cheating/"fornication" OK, poly is wrong? Get a grip!
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  #39  
Old 07-19-2011, 03:56 AM
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Just to update: A unfriended me on FB (she was only friends with me, not hubby anyways) and has not made any contact with hubby or I since everything yesterday. I guess the friendship was lost over wanting to bring her in.

We're not going to let this get us down though. Hubby still has the other girl to flirt around with have fun with for now. It won't actually turn in to a relationship, we're both sure of this. But, it allows him to have some fun for the time being.
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  #40  
Old 07-19-2011, 08:57 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by openbj View Post
Hubby still has the other girl to flirt around with have fun with for now. It won't actually turn in to a relationship, we're both sure of this. But, it allows him to have some fun for the time being.
Having someone to practice your flirting and fun with is a good thing. Plus, after working on improving his flirty technique, he can try the new moves on you and see how they work.
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