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Old 11-21-2009, 09:05 PM
bryophyte bryophyte is offline
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Western North Carolina
Posts: 8
Default Getting out of the lurk closet

Hello all!

I don't know if I have time for another forum in my life, but I'm here anyway apparently.

I'm living in Western North Carolina (about an hour from Asheville) and am a grad student out here studying invasive plants and working in a nearby park (only 2 more weeks til my season is done! bummer. Gonna be sad to give up my badge.) killing invasive plants and saving hemlocks. I'm originally from Ohio.

I'm fairly new to poly. I have been dating my gf for a little over a year and we set our relationship to poly last April. She has always been poly but we never discussed it because I had said super early on that I'm ok with poly but it seems like a lot of drama so I'm not interested in it...so she didn't tell me she was poly. Ooops. Anyway, in March, some jerk guy was hitting on her and she told me he said "I know your relationship will open up eventually so let me know when it does" or something along those lines. Of course he was a scumbag so even though we did open it up, he was not involved So anyway, I thought about it a bit and figured it would be ok.

However, there was noone she was interested in for like 3 months and certainly noone interested in me (don't know what it is, but people are always falling all over her, but noone hits on me and I'm shy). She had a fling with a guy over the summer and that was it until she got to band camp and met a guy and they fell pretty fast and suddenly I had to get reallyreally good with serious poly reallyreally fast. I had a hard time at the beginning because she was super busy this year as well, so we suddenly never saw each other and had no time to talk and there was this new guy whom she was head-over-heels with. They fell enough that she made it an even "V." When when we started down the poly path she was only interested in primary/secondary. After 2 months or so I got my head out of my insecurity-filled-butt and we've both been soooo much happier (though I still miss her! she lives 15 minutes away and we've not spent a night together since September). She's had some problems with the bf (and now they have "undefined" their relationship- he is insecure and not dealing with poly well, despite the fact that he wouldn't be dating her at all if not for poly! there are other issues as well though) but they are doing better in the last week or so too. She's a lot happier recently. whew.

I haven't really met many people. I've been really busy and not getting to places where I could possibly meet women who might be interested in me, and until recently I hadn't had much luck on OKCupid. But! I have a date on Tuesday with someone who is a 93% match! (my gf and I had a 93% match before she deleted that account- its also where we met!) I'm not gonna get my hopes up too high, but I'm pretty excited

Also, I apologize for my love of emoticons. I know some people hate em.
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Old 11-22-2009, 08:41 AM
greenearthal's Avatar
greenearthal greenearthal is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Buffalo, NY
Posts: 208


Why would the eternal ephemeral motherboard give us emoticons if she had not intended for us to use them?
me n the band, singin our song
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Old 11-22-2009, 04:57 PM
Fidelia Fidelia is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Right here. Right now.
Posts: 652

Hi! Welcome!

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