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Old 08-17-2010, 05:32 AM
Jade Jade is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: in a house
Posts: 189

Originally Posted by saudade View Post
There are lots of concepts (marriage and poly included) that I just see as boxes. Everybody throws stuff in their box, and wraps it, and then calls the sum of the parts X. For the 'marriage' box, lots of people throw monofidelity in-- but there's lots of other stuff we can choose to put in (with or without monofidelity):
  • remaining together until death
  • raising children
  • combining finances
  • purchasing property
  • sharing a home
  • taking care of each other

Every marriage has a box that defines it... Sometimes the people involved discuss what to put in and what to throw away, and some of it in there because the entire culture around them has it that way, and some of it just gets thrown in through habit and repetition.

My marriage box with K is primarily about: lifetime partnership; solidifying the trunk of our poly constellation; an explicit agreement to raise children together as our own; and a financial merger for mutual convenience and security.

What's the name of your box? What's in it?
I love this concept. I could actually see it used as a tool to help examine differences between relationships, between people. Even spouses would come up with different boxes.
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Old 08-18-2010, 02:45 AM
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PixieStyx PixieStyx is offline
Join Date: Jun 2010
Location: Salt Lake City, UT
Posts: 29

I would totally marry my secondary and would love for my husband to marry his! I am inactive LDS but I have some pagan leanings and have considered handfastings ceremonies. DH and I attend Grey School of Wizardry who of which the headmaster is Oberon Zell who is also poly LOL. I would LOVE for him to perform handfastings for us.
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Old 08-19-2010, 04:57 AM
dragonflysky dragonflysky is offline
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Join Date: May 2010
Posts: 211

Originally Posted by swfltriad View Post
Wow, this is all very good information! We're in our planning stages for our ceremony. But, we're looking for someone to officiate it, does anyone have any ideas or tell us what they did?
As corny as it may seem, I recently got "ordained" through an online church. The ordination isn't attached to any specific denomination, belief system, etc. I can refer to myself as "Rev. Dragonflysky" or even "Goddess Dragonflysky".......or any number of titles. Anyhow, many States legally recognize these types of ordinations under the auspices of "religious freedom". You just have to register your license/ordination with the State to perform wedding ceremonies, etc. That's not why I did it, but I've known others that have done this in order to officiate at the wedding ceremony of friends and family members.
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Old 03-27-2011, 09:32 PM
koihugs koihugs is offline
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Minnesota
Posts: 5
Default Committment Ceremonies

Hi folks,

My partners (FFM triad) and I are going to have a wedding this summer. We have an officiant, and we're looking for a venue. We expect to have under 50 people at our ceremony. We're in the upper midwest.

In addition to the normal planning woes we have the added element of trying to find a venue that won't be difficult because of the alternative nature of our relationship. Right now we're leaning toward renting a cabin at a resort, or water park, or finding an outdoor location to do the ceremony.

I would love to hear stories about any commitment ceremony stories out there!!

Thanks all!

Last edited by koihugs; 03-27-2011 at 09:34 PM. Reason: Editing error...
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Old 03-30-2011, 09:32 PM
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magikman79 magikman79 is offline
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: College Station TX
Posts: 53
Default a mans word

I a big believer of "A mans word is his bond" I made promises to both girls that I will keep for the rest of their lives, even though our unicorn is gone.

I gave them both my word on several issues & that was enough.

But I can understand wanting more, just be ready for society to not understand you.

Be strong
"The more a thing is perfect, the more if feels pleasure and pain."

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Old 04-02-2011, 06:14 AM
koifish koifish is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 71

I think a semi-private ceremony with only the very supportive.
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advice, ceremonies, ceremony, commitment, commitment ceremony, marriage, poly marriage, stories

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