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  #51  
Old 08-28-2011, 07:40 PM
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Default Mr. Popper's Penguins

We gathered around in March as a family and I read the original Mr. Poppers Penguin's by Richard and Florence Atwater. This was before I heard of the movie. Lovely little book. A poor family, that donít live in New York. They live in Stillwater. Work ends for the Poppers in Sep. every year. They live off beans.

They are gifted a penguin by a friend. This little boy emperor penguin is named caption cook. It gets depressed so they manage to get another penguin from a zoo. Greta is her name. They have ten little penguins (Climate change or something led to a large nest.). The penguins were give wonderful names: Ferdinand, Nelson, Scott, Victoria, Jenny, Adelina, Magellan, Louisa, Columbus, Isabella.

They work together training these penguins. They work everyday together as a family bundled up in the basement. There is a small pot of beans and a whole lot of love. They get the break and do a large tour across America. Read the rest if you want the ending.

The movie on the other hand was just depressing. Yea, parts of it are funny as heck. The Dew knows the full difference between book and movie. She has been driving me nutts asking why its not the same. I told her they just didn't read the book. Which was true. There is no correlation between book and movie.

Is it just out of fashion that a momma and poppa hang together. That the family bonds through just about anything. Be it Poppa show off a penguin or his new bra. Whether it be momma pounding on the keys of her piano in gloves (training the penguins), or finding an alternative sexual route to avoid scratching eyes out. Can the kids be raised without the hatred they are taught to gain now at such a young age.

Can we not show a poor family on the screen? Are you just not "it" if you don't have large apartments in New York, and an assistant? Are you out of vogue if you do not have alternative weekends for your children? Do we really need to see another family split, a snooty teenager, an all about the firm daddy? Is our mainstream culture stagnating?

What is that doing to our language? Language is so important to the human species that many philosophers argue that a deterioration of language is a deterioration of ourselves. Is it just one too many years I have spent in sociology and humanities?

The Dew has demanded a reread of the book. She had me print out penguins and I for once didn't have to help her past them on construction paper and cut them out. I did write all their names on their bellies. I also glued on small pretty flowers for the girls, and a special star on the leader.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.
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  #52  
Old 08-28-2011, 07:49 PM
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Default Life still hasn't got any easier

Jewell and cat-fight. We have been doing it way too much. Something I can understand, but we still need to work through it. We got into it so bad that I hardly spoke to her all day, and slept on the farthest corner of the bed last night. We worked through it by morning. I took Dew to get ice cream and pulled over on the dirt roads to pick her different colored flowers.

I seen her weep like never before. This morning she got a call from his ex. She has almost and still may lose her oldest son by a car accident. That is kinda why I left. To give her space to make calls, and deal with another hand that life has given us. When she gets back from the neighbors we are going to have a relaxing girly time. We will take a shower together, and I will do her nails, and fix her hair.

Later on we will go over to Lovers. I will probably help make dinner with him while she relaxes in her favorite chair. I will spend the night. I was almost going to scrap it on account of Jewell's new found news. I have to get the wood to start on this building project.

Tomorrow morning I will get dragged out of bed early and head three hours away for a bigger city with cheaper prices. Lover also has to deal with a bank we don't have here. Our closest town is very small.

I am excited to splurge a little on The Dews belated birthday party. My little princess turned 7 on the 16th of Aug. 7 years, I can't believe it! I only had a 3 and a 1/2 hour labor, barley making it to the birthing center. I didn't make it with Woogie, but that is a different post I will share around Thanksgiving.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.
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  #53  
Old 09-01-2011, 02:36 AM
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Default Meeting the wife and the boyfriend as they areÖ.

Jewell went over to the neighbors last night while I was spending time getting tippsy with Lover. She came over in her favorite tee shirt dress, and light purple nails. J was one to ask "whattcha wearing that for." She says its just her. Jewell talked about why I wasn't there at 7pm that night after The Dew stated just where I was leaving their mouths open. They wanted to meet the other part of the family. Lover wanted to meet our new found friends. We set up a time that morning.

Lover gloated silently that he was going to be introduced as my boyfriend, as an essential part of the family. He entered on their homemade road and found a parking spot. There they all where sitting around the porch, as the sun began to beat it noon day heat down. Jewell and J. C, The Dew, and Woogie.

J and Lover hit it off. They talked about guns and shot a couple, safely away. Jewell flowed between C and I's convo, and J and Lovers. Carla nudged me as soon as I sat on the red and white cooler next to her. She whispered in her Oklahoma accent. "So, you know Jewell came over yesterday. She was all momma-ed out in her dress. She looked so cute with them little girls." We giggled. She told me of a great friend she had that was MtoF.

It was so amazing having all these people we love. No big secrets. We are what we are and we give no false fronts, except for the safety of the unknown. Lover and J now buddies sat together. C, and I, and Jewell sat in the other half of the circle. Woogie sat on C's lap first almost hurting my feelings. Then she moved to mine. Then she moved to Lover. Then off to Jewell. Around and around she went.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.
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  #54  
Old 09-01-2011, 02:56 AM
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Default Good communication

How are you feeling?
How was your day?
Do you want any cream or sugar in your coffee.
That doesn't bother me.
I don't feel comfortable with that.
I am insecure and I need you.
I need space.
Why do you think you feel that way?
I think that is a great idea. What do you think?
Can I/we come over?
Please, stop tugging on the goods.
What should we have for breakfast?
Say it like you mean it.
Good Job.
Lets try this.
That’s an odd statement. Let me wrap my brain around it.
That feels really good.
Yikes, pause, I got a cramp in my leg.
Hey your way too deep, slow down sweety.
I'm afraid.
I'm stressing out.
I need a break.
I need a hand.
I need a hug.
Do you need help?
I strongly suggest you not stick your finger in that.
I want you.
I love you.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.
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  #55  
Old 09-05-2011, 06:40 PM
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Default

I forgot on the last post one of the most magical words: Please and Thank You.

I owe Lover a Thank you. I spent two days with him Sunday, and Monday nights. We went to the big city got wood for my house, and took care of a few things for him. We got champagne and had a fun time. Then two days at home. Playing with the kids and prepping the building and the place we store the hay. Then Thursday, and Friday nights with him again. I took time to help him work on his wintering preparations. I started my menses so I was happy to relax without being monstered. On Saturday all of us went and loaded hay. After a hundred bales were thrown on the trailer we all exhausted.

Lover asked at the last moment if he could babysit The Dew for the night, giving me and Jewell time alone. Who could say no to that. Jewell and I needed to run into town anyway and take care of a awful mess a cashier made with one of my purchases.

We ran into a friend in town. We met his roommate. He is a cute gay guy. Jewell and him, I would say, had to have hit it off. Seriously, I think they would make a cute couple. Our friend was a little shocked when she asked if he was single, without roommate there.

It shocked me too, but she has been more honest and open about his feelings toward guys. She was telling me she has actually been in a relationship with a guy, and was even honest enough to tell me (without The Dew there) that vaginas just creep her the hell out, they really always have, but it has just gotten a whole lot worse.

I have really come to understand that in the last year. At first I was really naive, and as she changed more I began taking it personally. After being with Lover I am like holy cows thatís sex, thatís someone that enjoys all of me. He even likes my private parts and will play with them, look at them, taste them.

In a way it still bums me out a bit. The last time Jewell and I had sex was sometime in February. Not kidding!! I give Jewell all kinds of love and touching but she doesn't want to reciprocate except for cuddling. If cuddling is her thing fine, I don't want her doing something she is uncomfortable with. Jewell just doesn't work anymore. I can tell she has been through it herself dealing, but I think it has come to a relief to her. No more of that pressure to preform. Her "natural parts" down yonder have never been her cup of tea. Its always her breasts and body.

Anyway, I was glad The Dew didn't come with. It took us an hour to straighten the mess. By the time we got home it was well after 9pm. I called Lover who was almost whispering on the other line. He had himself a great time reading and cuddling. Now she was asleep in my favorite spot.

I wondered what she thought as she caught us earlier that day cuddled together for a quick nap. All clothes on for the possibility of being caught was very high. Before we dozed Lover asked what should we do if she caught us. I giggled and told him it was okay. So I heard her pop open the door an hour later. I pulled myself from the rest and looked up. She smiled. I thought was going to pounce on us, but she never did. So I got up, which means I have to roll over Lover. She gave me a hug and told of how she missed me.

Now Lover had The Dew and was really enjoying having a kid he never had. He spent the morning with chatter box, having her help with chores. Mind you by the time I came over that Sunday he was glad to see I brought a six pack of beer, among relief. We talked over the local brews about winter plans, the upcoming goat auction, and the daunting task of gathering another 200 hay bales for our farm alone. Lover probably needs at least 200 for his year.

So much to do. I was so thankful that Lover gave us that night. We worked though some things. We share communication on all levels. For us to spend two hours going back and forth on a monthly budget is not a big deal. Once we are square it becomes my responsibility to keep us on track. Other than that we drank too much and laid in bed talking. She is still dealing with past family issues. She went through all her relationships with me. We talked about her oldest boy. She wanted to know a little bit more about Lover and I. I let her in on a thing or two, but I am very private. Odd me being privet with the person that watched me give birth. The person that I can pick my nose in front of.

Fall is coming. We can feel it now. In the morning everyone grabs thin warm coats. I need to rearrange things and find our winter gear. I will probably give The Dew 2 weeks off of school so I can build and get my ducks in order. She needs a break anyway. I am so glad I got the boot out of my school. Balancing two relationships, two kids, all the goats, dogs, cats, rabbits, the house, Jewells transitioning, and all the other crap I deal with Yikes! I still need 5 min to myself. I am the hinge, I am the heart beat of this family. If I am not balanced, everything may topple. A hurray, because when this is done I will be able to recreationally read and knit and maybe even sew again all winter long in my new warm cabin.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.
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  #56  
Old 09-06-2011, 02:29 AM
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Default Snap Day

I was thinking about some of the things I wrote and I stewed on them most of the day. When one thinks about it the last time Jewell has even seen my parts up close and personal would be around feb. Not that she would ever touch them. Holy balls. I know how to get her off and I still have. But its all her, ALL her. 7 MONTHS since the last time she touched me passionately. We don't make out. The last time she stuck her tongue in my mouth it was when she was half drunk, and it seemed forced on both our ends. That is something heavy I just hadn't wanted to think about. I love her and almost begged for months that she learn how to touch me. I can completely get off without penetration. No, she doesn't want to go there at all! It hurts. I am dealing with her calling me sister. Sometimes I like it, I feel proud. Other times I snap, and it just drives me to tears. I think I have had a snap day today. I have been cleaning, organizing, wiping away tears, and biting off heads.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.
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  #57  
Old 09-08-2011, 06:23 PM
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Default Say it like it is

I am insecure and moody. When I came back from Lovers today Jewell and the kids were not there. I was spinning stories about how she doesn’t love me anymore. I have done that before. I finally admitted it as we were snuggled together that night. She though it might just be the void of us not having sex that causes more need for "I love you's", and that insecurity. She was saying that she felt that we were slightly growing apart. I remarked that I had "grown up" in the last 2 years and that I just wasn't her tail anymore. I was into doing my own projects, and being more of my own person.

She asked me earlier that day when I got home after spending the morning and most of the afternoon at Lovers if I had done the project I said I was. I thought about it a second knowing very well that lying would have been easy enough. Instead I just told the truth. No, for once we didn't get to the project.

I flashed in my mind about putting on my boots after Lover and I had sex. It was hard to get them on and finally I gave up and we went and laid down for a nap. I lost another dog the previous night and spent most of the morning crying; alone. I have such a hard time showing any emotion in front of anyone. Anyway for once we didn't do anything except lay around the house. Seriously for once.

Jewell looked at me shocked, and then giggled. I think she was thankful I could still be honest. Sometimes its hard but lying quickly becomes harder. I was able to talk to Lover on the phone today about some important issues bothering me, and get his input on some things. I don't do that often, but I really need some one to talk to and some things have been pondering, and worrying about for too long.

"Say it like it is" is a motto I have been getting Jewell into. She can play games and snide the truth. Just say it like it is, how you feel, what you think.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.

Last edited by evrchanging; 09-08-2011 at 06:26 PM.
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  #58  
Old 09-11-2011, 04:10 PM
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Default

I decided to take everyone to town. It was our big food shopping day. I told Lover it would be he and I going. Then Jewell wanted to go. I don’t blame her. It was a cold rainy day. So, we all went once everyone had their farm chores done. I love having everyone together! To hold both their hands is spoiling. It was quite a scene with everyone in the store. What appeared to be two older men following me around with two little kids.

Lover had fun with Woogie. He took it on himself to pull her out of the car seat, and proudly carry her in. Then he would tickle and play with her. She is the quietest baby. So many people have told me so. I completely buried The Dew in the shopping cart. All you could see was her face to breath.

Jewell was surprised he came just to hang with us, and not get anything himself. Lover is lonely. He sits at home with his cigarettes and radio. He doesn't want to get out. He doesn't want another "heavy relationship". His reasoning are simple. He has been hurt too many times. I don't know how I ever got inside. I know I am deep: very, very deep.

I came over yesterday in my "fat pants" as the sun set to return his truck and spend the night. He was an absolute little boy. I had never seen him so open and venerable. I showered while his game finished on the radio. I walked around the house naked until I had full attention.

We had a session that lasted forever. I am still sore. I was working on being more vocal. I have been really shy. Not that I want to sound like a porn star, or scare away the coyotes. The more I was able to vocalize and open up the more he did the same. It was really great experiencing us both really baring all.

After that we stayed up late into the night fully engrossed in on of our favorite hobbies: cooking. It was a really fun night. I could hardly pull myself away that morning, after breakfast of course. He held me tightly for a long time . He gave me a passionate kiss, and finally let me go.
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.

Last edited by evrchanging; 09-11-2011 at 04:12 PM.
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  #59  
Old 09-11-2011, 04:13 PM
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Default "Hardest Of Hearts"

There is love in your body but you can't hold it in
It pours from your eyes and spills from your skin
Tenderest touch leaves the darkest of marks
And the kindest of kisses break the hardest of hearts

--Florence and The Machine
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I make the letter V. I am married to my wife Jewel (MtoF) for 8 years. Adopted into our family is my Sextoy/SSO (Straight Male).--Not living together.
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  #60  
Old 09-11-2011, 08:56 PM
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Default

I love those lyrics!

And I keep falling more and more in love with your writing.
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The world opens up... when you do.

Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me. ~Bryan Ferry
"Love is that condition in which another person's happiness is essential to your own." ~Robert Heinlein
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