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  #41  
Old 06-30-2011, 03:50 PM
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Originally Posted by Freetime View Post

I've been both spectator and Player in this dance, and I am quickly coming to realize that "poly" is used as a descriptor for a wide variety of relationships, some of which look a lot more like swinging than poly.

I don't get the "let's date everybody" attitude. I just don't. It puzzles me because it ends up limiting the time we have with those who we already have relationships with, and or are just developing. I'm watching those around me in hot pursuit of new/ different / more while barely spending time with those they've just started getting involved with. Weird. But what do I know, I'm new to this so maybe I'm wrong and this is what it's supposed to look like, but I don't think so.
You're not alone in the not getting the "let's date everyone" attitude. I can't date a whole bunch of people willy nilly because, for me, it cheapens what it means to share a romantic relationship with those I hold dear. I'm not judging those who do date many people, it just doesn't work for me.

I think the benefit of groups like this is that it gives you somewhere that you can talk freely about your relationships and not be judged. You're right that there are so many variations of poly that you're not always going to see eye to eye with how others live and love. If you've found some people who's company you enjoy that's what's important.
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  #42  
Old 07-01-2011, 01:21 AM
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Originally Posted by Derbylicious View Post
You're not alone in the not getting the "let's date everyone" attitude. I can't date a whole bunch of people willy nilly because, for me, it cheapens what it means to share a romantic relationship with those I hold dear. I'm not judging those who do date many people, it just doesn't work for me.
Agreed but then maybe that's why you are my sweety. Thing is though that there are bound to be people there that are like you and also trying to feel like they fit in some how. Because poly isn't mainstream, all we have starting out is groups. Then, hopefully one can narrow down to like minded friends and lovers in time.
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  #43  
Old 07-01-2011, 03:45 AM
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Motorcycle.... open road.... soon. So very very soon.
Now you're talking! Dating is overrated...riding is bliss
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  #44  
Old 07-01-2011, 06:12 AM
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Hey! You promised a visit to the island... come camping next weekend? pleeeeaaase?
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  #45  
Old 07-04-2011, 01:07 AM
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Hey! You promised a visit to the island... come camping next weekend? pleeeeaaase?
OK, I'm in. need to work out details but I need out, and this sounds like just the perfect thing. I am very much looking forward to meeting you and the clan.

If I like it there.....do I have to come back?
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  #46  
Old 07-13-2011, 12:57 AM
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Default It aint working.

FUCK!!!!!


Don't Stop
Don't slow down
never back up
Always forward

I wish I was in the forest again. or on a bike taking a road trip.
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  #47  
Old 07-13-2011, 01:07 AM
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Uh-oh.

Breathe.
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  #48  
Old 07-13-2011, 02:02 AM
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Default uh oh...breathe, but

talk it out....
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  #49  
Old 07-13-2011, 03:18 PM
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My best friend from back home is out here visiting this week, and was telling us last about some of the relationships struggles he's been going through. One of them being that there's been conflicts he's had with his gf when they're both tired, and not processing well, or let their tempers get the better of them. In the heat of the arguments there's contemplation's of breaking up, and such...I don't know if some of this might sound familiar.

So I reminded him of something from basic first aid....especially important knowledge for us Canucks too...they aren't dead, until they're warm and dead! (passive audience can wiki Hypothermia or something if you need to know where that came from)

The point I was getting to was that being tired, mad, drunk, distracted, etc, are not great times to make any decisions that are easy to regret. A relationship should not be dead, until the people involved are rested, sober, and ready to make sound decisions.

This bit isn't just for you Freetime, but hopefully it'll help remind you occasionally that these periods of things looking impossible have been transient and shall pass...and not do anything rash in the meantime.
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  #50  
Old 07-15-2011, 11:25 AM
Freetime Freetime is offline
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Default Big weekend is here, and other assorted noise.

My GF T2, and Ts BF M, are coming over for the weekend. 4 months into this, and yet another step along the path. I plan to have the time of my life this weekend, fun and frivolity are sure to ensue and I'll be giving a full report.... if I survive it.

I've had people point guns at me in anger, been in fights where I've had bruises left in the form of boot prints, seen horrible shit no one should ever see, and yet Poly scares me more then any of that.

Broken ribs, hand, nose, cracked cheek bone, etc and sometimes Poly seems more painful then anything I can compare this to.

I must be getting old. The fear of loss at times is overwhelming, watching T move further away from what we had and deeper into poly scares the fuck out of me. Which is why I organized this little adventure truth be told.

I figure living neck deep in Polyworld for 3 days will hopefully settle me down some and help me get a better grip on my new reality.

I find it humorous that the only thing I seem to be having trouble with is me.

T, her boyfriends, Poly, and all of the changes are not what keeps tripping me up. It's how I feel and think that's at issue here. The good news is that I know what the problem is, what to do about it is another story. Oh well, this should be interesting.

On a side note I met a very beautiful woman who I'm pretty sure could hurt me in ways i canna imagine, and who likes that sort of thing.

My life is really weird, some of the people in it are just as odd, and frankly I'm happy to have them along for the ride. I like odd. I like different and strange. Which is a good thing as I'm getting more then I could have imagined.


My apologies for the rambling.

be well.

Freetime.
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