Redpepper's journey

My (admittedly limited) experiences in this area have led me to believe that I simply wouldn't enjoy this play with someone I didn't trust completely. It is that exchange of trust which is so thrilling. I simply can't imagine giving that to a stranger, or receiving the same from them.
 
My (admittedly limited) experiences in this area have led me to believe that I simply wouldn't enjoy this play with someone I didn't trust completely. It is that exchange of trust which is so thrilling. I simply can't imagine giving that to a stranger, or receiving the same from them.

That's exactly how I feel too!
 
Thanks for the post Gemini. :) I can't think of anywhere to put that post.

I try and live by example. As I do in poly, taking other people as examples is how I got here. I still take others as an example and make out of it my own life. I hope that by expressing myself and keeping at my journey of life in many areas, that it will be put to use, as I have put other's expressions to use.

So the journey of obtaining my room has begun. PN, Mono and I have been emailing back and forth on a group email for a week now trying to figure out the details of Mono's move. The tenants we have in the suite in the lower part of our house will be moving out in two weeks. I will be able to make up my room after that and we can see about what needs to be done down there.

So far, rent was discussed first. That and hydro, internet etc., all the boring stuff to me. I left that all up to the men. :p

Next is what I need to create my room. I have been saving artwork, a lamp, a bedhead and a chest with all my ritual stuff in it for years, waiting for this moment. I need a double bed, bedding, a small desk, a nightstand and a comfy chair. I can't wait to get started! :D

I have been trying to get PN on board with the idea that he will have his own room also! He gets the best bedroom in the house! Lucky man.

I've also been talking a lot with the boy about what it will mean that I am downstairs more often. He doesn't want to come down there, but I am trying to explain that he is welcome and that I will be lonely for him if he doesn't. He can bring our new guinea pig there, play his DS, bring books, snuggle, watch movies. My biggest fear is his lack of mumma time. The rest is negotiable. With kids it's more difficult. Time will tell. At least I will be home and near him instead of across the city!
 
I'm sure that once your tenants are gone and the downstairs is incorporated as part of your home as a whole, he will have no problem with it. Have him help you fix it up, that way he feels some ownership of it also.
 
I'm excited thinking about each of you getting more space! I love personal space and will be interested to see what each of yours looks like, ultimately.

If things are working and we put a door in, then I think a lot of our lives will just flow back and forth.

Maybe I'll plant something of my own in the garden. Something to share, but something to nurture by myself. Who knows? I am looking forward to using the back yard more as a family, and a housewarming party!
 
I am holding back on being excited. I'm anticipating excitement. But really, I'm worried about my connections with everyone. I don't want to spread myself too thin and find I don't use my room.

My relationship with PN is an effort at times, and I don't want to leave him out.
Child stuff is hard sometimes, and I want to make sure I deal with it.
Mono enjoys his time alone and I don't want us to bug him too much.

So much to consider!
 
Hey RP, just remember that everyone deserves their own space and quiet time. Your son gets his own room, and he'll understand why you get one, too. Having "me space" makes us all healthier and much more fun when we do get together with the loved ones of our choice, right?

Yay, so happy that you're finally getting something you have needed for a long time!
 
I am holding back on being excited. I'm anticipating excitment but really I'm worried about my connections with everyone. I don't want to spread myself too thin and find I don't use my room. My relationship with PN is an effort at times and I don't want to leave him out, child stuff is hard sometimes and I want to make sure I deal with it, Mono enjoys his time alone and I don't want us to bug him too much... So much to consider!

Even if you aren't using your room all the time just knowing that it's there for an escape when you need it will probably be good for you. You already schedule yourself so well, including your "me time" that it will probably go much more smoothly than you are expecting once you have that space. The only difference is really going to be that no one has to travel to be together or apart anymore.
 
Thanks, guys. Time will tell. Patience.

Planning a Halloween party, I think, as a housewarming-- still in progress. Have to get the old energy out there and fuse it with new energy from friends!
 
We've got to stop talking about a housewarming party. I'm already stressing about people invading my space. LOL :(
 
Still in progress. Have to get the old energy out of there and fuse it with new energy from friends!

Umm... yeah. How about we have it upstairs? I like the energy in my space to be very limited. Or we could put up energy-shielding screens or something on the way to your room. This is causing me serious anxiety.
 
Of course we can have it upstairs. Everything is up for negotiation. People in our/your space is a part of that. I won't be forcing anything on anyone. We shall talk more. :)
 
It only took a year for anyone besides you, Polynerdist and your son to be invited into my apartment. I'm sure you were amazed when I asked if Derby was coming over to get ready for the BDSM event! I spent another year where only you came to my place at the mountain. I am obviously quite a freak. But I am your freak, every last and little bit yours. :eek:
 
It's completely ok to be posessive about your space. People do bring energy with them and can leave it behiend. I found your place to be very scerene and I think maybe it's because there aren't a lot of people coming though it. (but then again it could just be that you don't have any stuff! :p).
 
It only took a year for anyone besides you, Polynerdist and your son to be invited into my apartment....I'm sure you were amazed when I asked if Derby was coming over to get ready for the BDSM event! I spent another year where only you came into my place at the mountain. I am obviously quite a freak..but I am your freak....every last and little bit yours :eek:

I get extremely nervous if even the doorbell rings and we aren't expecting anyone ... *HUG*
 
RP, how about a slumber party with your son after you're all settled in? Movies, snacks, a couple of lazy games.

Mono, I so know how you feel about people in your space. Bud's friend may be sleeping over Saturday night and I hate it, but I agreed. I just let him know I will be sleeping in my daughter's room that night because I don't know him like he does. I'm in for a very long sleepless night. It's no offense to him. I only trust a handful of people when I'm awake, let alone when I'm not.
 
I find it interesting that I will now be living with TWO men who are not into guests. While I appreciate that they like their haven, I love guests! :D
 
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