Can a loner by polyamourous?

FreeandUnited

New member
I posted this before, but somehow it's gone. Maybe because I posted it before I was "official"(?)

Anyway, what do you all think? Can someone who is a bit of a loner still be polyamourus?
 
Sure they can. After seeing the broad spectrum of approaches on here and in my local community, the only thing I truly feel is a minimum requirement to be polyamorous is the ability to engage in multiple intimate/romantic relationships simultaneously.

Nothing says you have to actually be in multiple relationships. That would be like saying you're only gay if you actually have a partner of the same sex right now.
 
I agree completely - if you feel you have the ability to having loving relationships with more than one person then why not?
 
Yes, someone who is solo can be polyamorous. If you had to be partnered to be polyamorous, it would mean your identity, who you are as a person, is contingent on other people and how others see you. That would not be a healthy.

~Raven~
 
Of course !
"polyamorous" should be viewed as an adjective - not as a verb :)
It's a way of viewing/understanding ourselves and the world.
 
I posted this before, but somehow it's gone. Maybe because I posted it before I was "official"(?)

Anyway, what do you all think? Can someone who is a bit of a loner still be polyamourus?

Being rather a hermit offline, I'd say "yes" -- for me, it tends to mean being polysaturated (what a word!) at two partners who are at least able to understand what introversion means and not drag me into their social calendars.
 
I have really bad social anxiety and depression which pretty much makes me a loner, and I am still open to polyamory,or have been in a poly relationship but dating one person. That said having depression kinda conflicts with the poly lifestyle at times but i dont think being a "loner" would rule out poly at all. if a "loner" could be mono, why not poly.
 
Having a romantic connection with someone doesn't require being a social butterfly. The same goes for having a romantic connection with more than one person.

I've known quite a few poly people who are pretty introverted and they have had some amazing loving relationships. So yeah, it's very possible and probably happens more than you think :)
 
GS, I didn't know it wasn't there already! I don't even know where I heard it -- must've come up in a discussion between CdM and self. :) I love it, personally; perfect descriptor for being replete with love and happiness.
 
I something of a loner, and I identify as polyamorous by nature.

I'm a total homebody, and I much prefer a quiet evening with myself over a wild party or bar hopping. I also enjoy small social get togethers, but I find that even with my closest friends, I really have to psych myself up and get in the mood to go out, even though I always have a good time when I do.

I don't know if this is what you mean by being a loner. If you mean "someone who only ever wants to be completely alone" then I think that would preclude you from any kind of "amory," poly or mono. But humans are social creatures, and I don't believe any human could be completely healthy and happy without ANY social relations, so I'm going to assume this isn't your definition.

I have a hard time meeting people romantically, mostly because I don't make the effort, but also because I'm very shy around strangers.
 
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