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Old 02-21-2012, 05:07 AM
hero hero is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Philadelphia
Posts: 1
Default Looking for supportive ears

Hi all!

So I won't say that I'm new to poly, but I am new to well-functioning poly. Before meeting my fiancÚ, I had been in open relationships before, but I mostly dated sort of passive partners and thus could do basically whatever I wanted with no argument.

D is different. He is everything that I want in a person. He challenges me. He doesn't let me get away with not being accountable to myself in our relationship.

That said, I have only recently begun to work on managing my own emotional yickiness and creating a positive poly relationship.

I find that I need a supportive ear when things go wrong in addition to needing to read other peoples stories and understand their struggles and successes. I don't want to bring the initial negative pouring-out of emotional content to D's doorstep because all it does is make both of us miserable. So what I would like to do here is air my initial gut reactions and commiserate with people, get the advice of other, more experienced poly people, and feel like I can come to D with my concerns in a loving and non-charged way.

I'm really excited to get to know and connect with all of you. Thanks for reading!

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Old 02-22-2012, 05:10 AM
nycindie's Avatar
nycindie nycindie is offline
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: The Big Apple
Posts: 10,083

It sounds like you are preparing for things to go wrong. Are you anticipating imminent difficulties?
The world opens up... when you do.

"Oh, oh, can't you see? Love is the drug for me." ~Bryan Ferry
"Love and the self are one . . ." ~Leo Buscaglia

Click here for a Solo Poly view on hierarchical relationships
Click here to find out why the Polyamorous Misanthrope is feeling disgusted.
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