Thanks for reading and commenting, Evie and Atlantis.
Things have taken a turn. I need to let it play out, but Susan has a new online boyfriend. She is gripped tightly in the throes of NRE to the point where she is considering things that are completely against her nature. She is planning on travelling to see him (which she hates and it totally freaks her out .. more on this on a second), considering a life with him (even though he's 800 miles away), and ending our sexual relationship.
I know it's just NRE, but I'm scared. She really wants a primary and they've really connected. At first she did say she could only deal with one primary sexual relationship, but she recently said "the nature of our relationship will not change." Some days she's still totally into me and needs me to take care of things. She was even very flirty all weekend after helped with some non-related travel stuff and fixed her iPhone. But then yesterday she ignored me most of the day and then was very distracted when we did chat.
To complicate matters, we are going on vacation together in 10 days for a whole week. If she's distracted the whole time, I'm going to be really hurt. At the same time I don't want to put the trip in jeopardy. I have been with her before when she's distracted by a new beau, and it has been ok, but this feels different.
On to me being competitive and petty. So her new guy.. I'll call him Josh. She has been talking to him for about 2 1/2 months and they have been romantic the last 3 weeks. She said they were supposed to talk Friday, but he decided to go to a sports bar instead. She needed me to tell her everything would be ok, which I did. He wants her to fly to see him, but she hates travelling so much that I have to help her buy airline tickets and check in for flights. Of course she agreed to fly there.
I know it's NRE compounded by the fact this is the first interest she has had since she was done mourning her ex-bf (cancer). By the same token, if I'm going to be consolation prize, I need to make changes in my life. I can't just sit around pining. The question is when to say, "I love you and I want you in my life, but I need to make some changes to be happy even though they are going to hurt you and damage our relationship."
Sigh.
Farmgirl is out of the sig. We are just friends and I don't see that changing.