I am feeling better day by day.
Thank you for asking.
Today I am meeting with both of them together where we are going to openly and honestly talk about everything and everyone's wants, needs, and feelings.
To my surprise, this was the initiative of not myself, but my bf, who wants to make sure I understand it was never his intention to replace me and own up to breaking my trust and not being honest.
So I will update later everyone on the outcome.
I am taking everyone's ideas, thoughts, questions, and useful information with me and now that I am calmer, I can think clearer, and ready to continue breaking own the elephant in the room. I feel I have a support system in place and starting to understand more about myself, and what can be in the future.
Maybe you Answer: I want to be with you know, in a triad. I do not know what over time will bring. I cannot answer that part right now. But if pressed to answer, I want you both. If that is a dealbreaker for you, then we need to address it now rather than later.
Yes, this is what I told gf because I want to be 100% honest. We are going to be discussing this today as well.
Maybe you Answer: I don't want a baby right now or marriage, but I'm touched you would ask. Thank you. Yes, I want to be in a triad right now with GF. I do want to try to work it out. If it doesn't, we will reassess. But I don't want to think about future polyships when we are IN one right now that needs tending.
I agree, I am going to be discussing this too because you are correct, I am NOT comfortable with getting married or having a baby right now while we have not fully worked out the current issues.
I am also going to try your suggesstion on the wheel with myself, and with both gf anf bf, and trio tier.
Wish me luck, I will update soon. and @GalaGirl, thank you for sharing with me your conflict resolution and framework as a V.