Yeah, I really thought I was a bigger person than this, lol. I dabbled in poly over the years. Then I fell head over heels for a fellow who doesn't believe in traditional relationships. I meditated and read about that for a month and was in. I set an OKC profile. I got him to set one up. I knew I was opening his eyes to that world.
I've gone on a couple of meet and greets. I haven't found a guy I'm attracted to in person. He's out getting laid. I care so much about him, maybe I'm not the right person for him to have this adventure with. The fact I use the word "laid" and not "making love" or "finding a beautiful physical connection,"
. . . Oh, I vomited in my mouth a little.
Everything is difficult for me in finding a deep personal-emotional-connection. I can play the game. He's balls deep. Get it? lol
I might not be able to do this