There was a lot of talk last night with Joe.
He loves me. I thought he did, there have been a lot of little touches and pokes when characters say it on tv.
He said I am hard to read and he has no idea if I even like him or not. He feels like he could walk away and it wouldn't affect me at all.
He is deeply concerned about time management, mainly from my end and I appeared fully stretched as it is, and added to that statement that he is "gut-punched" that I am planning a trip with Prof.
He thinks we are very different people, wonders what I am doing with him, he considers himself "boring".
He has a number of insecurities about our relationship, he says that are his and not mine.
He says I was pretty clear about the non-exclusive dating, but he wanted to avoid having a frank discussion about it too.
He very much enjoys the time we spend together, does not ask for more though he wants it.
He wanted to know why he "is not enough". Why would I want more than one relationship?
Had Prof met the kids?
Understands having a FWB, like Kip, but not another emotional relationship which I seem to have with Prof.
How can someone who is so poor at relationship and emotional communication feel like they can manage 2 relationships?
Was I aware that I have swung so far from the control of my marriage to being way out there with the independence?
What did I say?
I said I care deeply, and can care for more than one person at a time and express it though doing rather than saying.
I have fairly successfully managed time so far.
I explained a little about primary and secondary hierarchies and that I didn't subscribe to that, but there is an ebb and flow in what people want and need and some flexibility is needed.
I said I will not do a list of relationship rules like Prof and Ms Text's, that control the other relationships, but boundaries etc within in each relationship were fine and negotiable.
I enjoy him and Prof for different reasons, and I am not Frankendating.
I said that Prof and I were working on a new normal, there were/are many changes since Ms Text had passed.
I am not looking for a primary type partner.
I did not say that I am overwhelmed with Prof and his needs.
I don't think he will be able to do it. I think he may want to give it a go but that the perceived sharing and jealousy will make him unhappy very quickly. He will wonder why he is not enough and that will eat him up from the inside out.
We agreed to cut way back on the I.M. He asked for no contact at all, which I agreed to, then he started with questions. I suggested that he should feel free to ask but I will not initiate while he is processing. He agreed.
He is going hiking with a friend this morning and I hope he takes the opportunity to discuss this with someone outside the relationship.
One part of me is hoping that he just breaks up with me now.
My stress levels are through the roof. I need to go distract myself from this.
He loves me. I thought he did, there have been a lot of little touches and pokes when characters say it on tv.
He said I am hard to read and he has no idea if I even like him or not. He feels like he could walk away and it wouldn't affect me at all.
He is deeply concerned about time management, mainly from my end and I appeared fully stretched as it is, and added to that statement that he is "gut-punched" that I am planning a trip with Prof.
He thinks we are very different people, wonders what I am doing with him, he considers himself "boring".
He has a number of insecurities about our relationship, he says that are his and not mine.
He says I was pretty clear about the non-exclusive dating, but he wanted to avoid having a frank discussion about it too.
He very much enjoys the time we spend together, does not ask for more though he wants it.
He wanted to know why he "is not enough". Why would I want more than one relationship?
Had Prof met the kids?
Understands having a FWB, like Kip, but not another emotional relationship which I seem to have with Prof.
How can someone who is so poor at relationship and emotional communication feel like they can manage 2 relationships?
Was I aware that I have swung so far from the control of my marriage to being way out there with the independence?
What did I say?
I said I care deeply, and can care for more than one person at a time and express it though doing rather than saying.
I have fairly successfully managed time so far.
I explained a little about primary and secondary hierarchies and that I didn't subscribe to that, but there is an ebb and flow in what people want and need and some flexibility is needed.
I said I will not do a list of relationship rules like Prof and Ms Text's, that control the other relationships, but boundaries etc within in each relationship were fine and negotiable.
I enjoy him and Prof for different reasons, and I am not Frankendating.
I said that Prof and I were working on a new normal, there were/are many changes since Ms Text had passed.
I am not looking for a primary type partner.
I did not say that I am overwhelmed with Prof and his needs.
I don't think he will be able to do it. I think he may want to give it a go but that the perceived sharing and jealousy will make him unhappy very quickly. He will wonder why he is not enough and that will eat him up from the inside out.
We agreed to cut way back on the I.M. He asked for no contact at all, which I agreed to, then he started with questions. I suggested that he should feel free to ask but I will not initiate while he is processing. He agreed.
He is going hiking with a friend this morning and I hope he takes the opportunity to discuss this with someone outside the relationship.
One part of me is hoping that he just breaks up with me now.
My stress levels are through the roof. I need to go distract myself from this.