Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions


Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 08-17-2010, 11:26 AM
tinylove's Avatar
tinylove tinylove is offline
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 39
Question Interesting situation looking for advice

Okay the situation:

There is me,my husband,my boyfriend and his best friend.

My boyfriends best friend is who I originally started seeing we met and he was with his friend we all hung out together a few times and then he decided not to continue the relationship. During this time me and his friend hooked up.

So now it has come up that my boyfriends best friend wants to see me again but there is conflict due to the fact that they are best friends and if something goes wrong between me and one of them that I would be one that would have to go.

My boyfriend has also never been in a poly relationship, up till this point he was mono. his friend has but I do not think he fully understands the concept of them. (they are also young so I think this may play in to it)

I would would to date them both but I told them there would have to be some sort of commitment to establish a relationship.

They also feel like my since I am married that my primary has me and they only have part of me they feel that it won't be able to go any farther than that and I think that scares them a little.

So I guess I am looking for advice on what to say to them, ways I can reassure my boyfriend, or any advice you may want to give .

On another note:

This past weekend we were all hanging out together. This was a first time thing for me to be around all three of them. I found myself not knowing how to respond to each of them and I found myself kinda turning off , I feel awkward and I am not sure how to be when I'm around them. At this point I only see my boyfriend once a week so I want to give my attention to him, but then I feel like I am neglecting my primary. Then of course there was my boyfriends best friend whom I could feel wanted to be with me too but we couldn't really talk about it. Not sure what I can do ?

Would love to here your experienced thoughts and advice.

~ "Kindness in thought leads to wisdom. Kindness in speech leads to eloquence. Kindness in action leads to love."
- Lao-Tsu

Last edited by tinylove; 08-17-2010 at 12:08 PM. Reason: it needed it!
Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 12:49 PM.