I've been wondering a few things about relationships in which the participants have made a commitment to be exclusive. With two people, this is considered monogamous, but if there are more than two (V, N, U shapes, triads, quads, for example) this is still considered poly. Do others in the poly community generally perceive 3+-person exclusive relationship units as being closer to typical monogamous units, or is this pretty common within the poly community?
Personally, I'm trying to figure out what I want out of a relationship. I've considered myself nonmonogamous, or at least open to nonmonogamous relationships, for all of my adult life, but never actually dated more than one person at a time.
Now, I'm in a relationship with a wonderful woman ("A") who I've been with for a year. The whole time, we've been open to the idea of dating other people, but neither of us had met anyone we had chemistry with until recently. She just told me that she started dating someone she met a month ago, and I recently met someone I'd potentially be interested in dating, who is visiting me from out of town this weekend.
Since it's my first time actually in this situation, I'm trying to figure out what the end-game is. "A" and I have talked about our future, and assuming things continue as they have been, I could see us dating for years or our lifetime. Ideally, I'd love any additional partners I take on to have (or have the potential to develop) a similar level of importance. But if you're always open to meeting and forming relationships with new people, doesn't the polycule just keep growing and becoming less structured and substantial? Where does it end?
I'd love to hear perspectives on this from other poly people, so I can know if I should be prepared for a lifetime of tenuous, volatile relationships, or if it's typical for units to 'close off' at some point
Personally, I'm trying to figure out what I want out of a relationship. I've considered myself nonmonogamous, or at least open to nonmonogamous relationships, for all of my adult life, but never actually dated more than one person at a time.
Now, I'm in a relationship with a wonderful woman ("A") who I've been with for a year. The whole time, we've been open to the idea of dating other people, but neither of us had met anyone we had chemistry with until recently. She just told me that she started dating someone she met a month ago, and I recently met someone I'd potentially be interested in dating, who is visiting me from out of town this weekend.
Since it's my first time actually in this situation, I'm trying to figure out what the end-game is. "A" and I have talked about our future, and assuming things continue as they have been, I could see us dating for years or our lifetime. Ideally, I'd love any additional partners I take on to have (or have the potential to develop) a similar level of importance. But if you're always open to meeting and forming relationships with new people, doesn't the polycule just keep growing and becoming less structured and substantial? Where does it end?
I'd love to hear perspectives on this from other poly people, so I can know if I should be prepared for a lifetime of tenuous, volatile relationships, or if it's typical for units to 'close off' at some point