I hope you don't mind Mohegan, but if I were you I would be stepping away, zipping my mouth shut and just listening and waiting and consoling Karma if he needs that and venting to someone who is not involved in order to keep my cool. Just a thought.
Can't do that. That's not me. Karma and I agreed from day one that that's not how things would work for us. We share everything, and what effects him, effects me. That's how it is.
I've deleted the posts in question because things were taken out of context.
Cricket and I have already talked, and while I don't get why she is doing what she is doing, I respect that this is what she thinks she needs to do.
My problem came in where I got half the story from Karma and was then left to stew over it while he slept. I kept myself busy as long as I could, waiting for himt o get up and go over it all again. But eventualy I drove myself nuts and turned to the one place I have always expressed these feelings.
That was apparently the wrong thing to do.
After reading Crickets blog, I had started an apology blog, when things got taken out of context and went past the point of productive and into the point of anger.
I do hope the best for her. I do hope this is truly what she needs. I hope she is able to find what she is looking for. Because I want that for everyone. I personaly, wouldn't go about it in this way, but if this is how she feels she needs to do it, then I'll repsect that.
But that doesn't change the fact that my husband is hurting, and worse I am 7 f'ing hours away and can't be there for him. So I did the only thing I knew to do. And it was wrong. I'm sorry.
I understand that I am not in their relationship and can only understand what it is they tell me. And that it is their relationship.
But my husband and I share everything, and when he hurts, my first instinct is to attack the source of said pain. Regardless of if it is his relationship or something else. I only want for him to be happy, and when he is hurt, I can't explain the rage that creates.
I was only trying to express my inability to understand where she was coming form and what I felt the reasoning was. I felt the ACTIONS were juvenile, not Cricket.
But as I said, I have apologized to both of them.
I am going to wait for my dad to get home from the hospital. Take care of him. And move on with my night. Becuase at least there I know I am doing the right thing.