RedPanda
New member
I've bumped into a lot of poly people I already know locally on OKCupid. Messaging them is usually pretty easy but I am finding I have lots of trouble messaging people I don't already know. The chief pattern I've noticed is that if I DON'T mention polyamory in my message, I am much more likely to get a response. What the heck???
Obviously this also holds true with people who are not poly (or at least don't say so in their profile). For me, it would seem disingenuous to hide the fact that I'm poly just for the sake of getting more responses.
I tried that once and got a coffee date on practically the first message. The girl was energetic and outgoing and didn't even read my profile. So it became apparent that she thought I was single. Awkward.
Before I was poly I learned how to message single monogamous people and get responses but apparently there's something I'm missing in messaging poly people. What gives? To be up front and honest or mildly evasive through omission?
Obviously this also holds true with people who are not poly (or at least don't say so in their profile). For me, it would seem disingenuous to hide the fact that I'm poly just for the sake of getting more responses.
I tried that once and got a coffee date on practically the first message. The girl was energetic and outgoing and didn't even read my profile. So it became apparent that she thought I was single. Awkward.
Before I was poly I learned how to message single monogamous people and get responses but apparently there's something I'm missing in messaging poly people. What gives? To be up front and honest or mildly evasive through omission?