JaneQSmythe
Well-known member
...
Once again, I realise that everyone has their own way of doing things, but since you don't consider this a casual relationship, it strikes me as somewhat off-kilter that you don't feel comfortable calling him or visiting without an invitation.
This isn't directed at you specifically, KC43, but out of interest I'll ask other readers: Is it a common part of "poly etiquette" to not call or show up at the homes of non-nesting partners unannounced?
I'd never thought of it before... but I guess, due to issues of privacy and the fact that one's partners may have several other partners, it may come across as intrusive to simply show up, yes/no?
It may be a matter of personal preference and have nothing to do with poly.
I would never show up at someone's house unannounced - whether they had other partner's or not. I would call or text first to make sure it was OK. I don't want anyone showing up at my house unannounced either - I might be having sex, or masturbating in the shower, or in a foul mood, or finishing a last minute project for work and not want to be interrupted.
I have a key to my BFF's house - and might drop by to play with the dog or something IF I know that she is NOT home. If I think she may be home I check and make sure I am not interrupting anything.
Personally, I even generally text the boys a "heads up" when I am heading home (the standing joke is that is so they can "send the strippers home").
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