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Old 11-19-2010, 01:57 AM
julanders julanders is offline
New Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 2
Exclamation Charting new territory...

Hello everyone…

I am fairly new to this lifestyle and need some advice from experienced folks…

Let me break it down….

My partner and I have been together for 10 years. We are a gay male couple. I love him dearly and can honestly see spending the rest of my life with him. At the beginning of our relationship I was very adamant about being a one-on-one couple despite the fact that my partner had been involved in two previous relationships where he was “the third.” It was new to me and, frankly, I was insecure. He nonetheless complied. As time has passed, I became open the idea of opening up the relationship. We currently are going on 2 years as an open couple. The primary rule we follow is that our time planned together is precious and not to be intruded on. We are very respectful of each other and the situation seems to come natural for us. However, the three way thing doesn’t work well for us because we are polar opposite “types” and we are also attracted to different types. I have met some really great people since we have opened things up and made some friends etc. But, as you all know situations arise that we never could have predicted...

A bump in the road….

About 6 months ago, I met this wonderful man who I have fallen hard for. We also have become great friends in the process. He does not like my lifestyle but accepts it because we are in love. He knew from day one about my long-term partner, but he does not want to talk about him, but also does not pressure me to leave him. The new guy says that I am all he needs and doesn’t need to look elsewhere. But...

Here is the issue…..

The problem that I am having is that I am insanely jealous of my new partner. When he flirts with others… when I see him on hook-up sites… when he talks about past boyfriends etc. What kills me is his online profiles still say that he is single. In a nutshell, in my mind, I want him for me and only me. It just seems totally hypocritical on my part, but my nature is taking over. It seems that my development towards a polyamorous lifestyle has taken a huge step back.

Please HELP!

I know that this lifestyle is difficult and many of you have had these same emotions. Please share, give advice or thoughts to my situation and how you have dealt with these crazy emotions.

If you have any questions I will check the board periodically. Thanks for reading this.

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