BDsm

Novices and Newbies was the first group I joined :) I'll see what I can find out through that. Thanks!
 
Fet does have articles and stuff, but I have to admit I don't know how to sift through them. They just come up on my newsfeed, according to what my "Fet friends" have written or commented on.
 
What kind of kink are you looking for exactly?
 
I don't really have an answer to that. That's why I'm on Fet, to explore what kinds of kink exist and see which ones strike a chord with me. I'm submissive, and I know D/s and light bondage get me going, but other than that I have no clue.
 
Ah, I have to say, Fet isn't very well organized, I mean, it doesn't have charts to break down various fetishes and get specific info on them. It operates more like Facebook. Selecting a friend exposes you to that friend's interests.
 
I don't really have an answer to that. That's why I'm on Fet, to explore what kinds of kink exist and see which ones strike a chord with me. I'm submissive, and I know D/s and light bondage get me going, but other than that I have no clue.

How exciting that you are on a threshold to a whole world of discovery.

I would suggest looking up one of those checklist things that people don't really use. They list all sorts of things. Some will jump out at you as a "Hell No!", some will be a "Hmmmm, maybe", and some will be a "WTF is that?" That will point you in the right direction as what to start searching for (in the search box). There are also thousands upon thousands of articles just out there on the internet.

Of course, there might be things that sound appealing, but turn out not to do anything for you. There really is no substitute for experience.
 
I found a link in the Novices & Newbies group to a list of kinks and links to threads about them, so I went through that list and compiled a list of things I think I'm interested in and things I wouldn't want to experience under any circumstances.

While I realize there's no substitute for experience, experiencing things without anyone with whom to experience them is a bit out of the realm of possibility. And I would rather have at least some idea of the "hell yeah," "meh," and "hell no" activities and kinks before I even consider interacting with anyone in anything other than a munch or other public setting. That way I'm at least making sure I find someone who isn't into the things I flat out won't try, and I can be more certain of my limits and boundaries.
 
Some of over/underlap in interests isn't necessarily a bad thing. Someone me lay have interests that don't appeal to you in the least, but they may also have interests you find intriguing. Regardless, you should expect tha,t no matter what interests you either share or don't share, your boundaries and limits will be respected. Vetting a potential BDSM partner and taking your time is important, especially if your compass isn't 100% fixed on your interests.
 
That's good news, KC43.

Can you tell me the web addresses of the group and the list of kinks? I want to be able to direct others to those things as well.
 
Seems like a good list.
 
Fet does have articles and stuff, but I have to admit I don't know how to sift through them. They just come up on my newsfeed, according to what my "Fet friends" have written or commented on.

The articles are written by fellow users. I usually just surf groups and if someone is saying interesting things I will look at their profile. Profiles have a list of articles written by the user. It really is a massive and haphazard site though...lol...I could surf it for hours.
 
Yeah, I'm behind on some of my writing stuff because of trying to navigate around Fet. I really need to get better at time management...

Kevin, I think you have to be a member of Fet and of that particular group to see the list. If someone joins Fet and searches for "Novices and Newbies" the group should come up.

Polychronopolous, I'm definitely taking my time with looking for people to interact with. Aside from not being a particularly trusting person and not being all that great at meeting others, I've been soundly lectured by my ex-boyfriend Guy about being careful, not meeting someone one-on-one, etc. I'm anticipating another round of lecturing from him the next time we talk, because he's that kind of person.
 
I noticed that. I'm not looking forward to it, just fully aware that I'm going to hear it from him whether I want to or not.
 
Re (from KC43):
"If someone joins Fet and searches for 'Novices and Newbies' the group should come up."

Sounds good.
 
A lot of people give advice like "don't meet one on one", but I have never had that happen to me. Meeting kinky people isn't that different from meeting "normal" people...in fact, most of us are "normal". I have always met one on one, usually in a public place.
 
Guy would tell me not to meet a vanilla man one-on-one either. Overprotectiveness and jealousy are two of his strongest character traits, unfortunately. He's mainly cautioning against meeting someone I've only interacted with online, as opposed to someone I met in person in a group first, such as at a munch or (vanilla) a "meet and greet" with the group I used to socialize with from AdultFriendFinder, which is how Guy and I met.

Though one would think after knowing me for two and a half years, one and a half of which we were seeing each other, the man would know better than to tell me not to do something. I get kinda stubborn and oppositional at times like that. (He told me he feels sorry for any Dom who ends up with me as a sub, because I'm a brat--and a pain in the ass.)
 
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