The sexual element

The problem I have with it is that men who are involved in institutional homosexual relations or those getting sex "on the down low" with other men because they don't have willing female partners don't identify as bisexual--they identify as straight.

Bingo!
 
Our only intent in broaching this topic was to try to raise the awareness level, particularly, in the female population, of the true repercussions of their attitudes and actions. To maybe foster a little self analysis by asking the question: "Is this the society I would intentionally choose to foster and live in?"

Wish we could see more activity on this topic.

You asked for "activity," after you told Ceoli to essentially STFU. I'm gonna give you some "activity":

It sounds like what you are saying is that women better start giving their men more sex, OR ELSE the men are going to get together and have sex without us.

Thanks for making us "aware" of that.

Ptooey!
 
Finally, perhaps you might want to spend a little more time reading existing posts here on this forum before you assume the ladies here are generally operating under the enculturation of repression so prevalent in Western society. .... I would say that, in general, we have either shaken off the shackles of repression, are picking the locks now, or at least rattling the chains.

You asked for "activity" and after telling Ceoli to essentially STFU, I'm gonna give you some "activity":

It sounds like what you are saying is that women better start giving their men more sex OR ELSE the men are going to get together and have sex without us.

Thanks for making us "aware" of that.

Ptooey!

Right On. :cool:
 
Females:
Try to dispose of societal programming about your gender. Embrace the natural sexuality you were gifted with at birth. The term "slut" can well be (and should be) a term of endearment ! A true orgasm (or a few) can be a huge boost to both your physical and emotional health.

What is an orgasm?

Is that the Japanese thing where you fold paper into shapes like birds and fruit and stuff?
 
Clarification

Hi Everyone,

Thanks again for the comments, so far. In hindsight, it seems, without this clarification, this was not a productive topic for the readers here. As mentioned in a later post, which so far only a couple people seem to have picked up on, the topic was really intended for a larger group. People who are already poly or poly-minded have searched themselves, to a degree, for answers.

The hope in posting was that other members may have had some of these discussions with their mono friends and could weigh in on how some of those conversations went.

Redsirenn, thanks for sharing. (Sorry, I haven't figured out the quote thing yet.)

Let's all just hope that the subject of poly as a possible viable solution to some age-old problems continues to spread to the mainstream.

{{{{{Hugs}}}} to all
 
I guess without Viagra all women in their golden years would switch to being lesbians, since their husbands can't get it up. Oh wait, according to this we are happy just being emotionally satisfied.

Ever heard of the angry vagina? Women are just as much, if not more, frustrated with men in the sack. Maybe these men who are so frustrated with woman need to improve their skills.

I think it's a big insult to the gay and bisexual community to think that men are "settling." From my experience with my gay male friends, they have super-high standards. So who in their right mind (besides someone in prison) would think that they would have a better chance of getting laid with a man?

It's an insult to men in general, actually, that they have no self control and will screw anything that is available, regardless if the person is their type, and that they don't have the willpower to continue to search out the ones they seek to share their life with. It reeks of laziness.

So, if even gay men won't have sex with a particular frustrated person, is bestiality the next resort?

I'm sorry. I like my men to have self control and standards. Excuse my vulgarity, but if you can't get me wet, that's your issue, not mine, because contrary to what men who don't know how to please women believe, women LOVE sex. Ever heard of a little thing called she's just not that into you?
 
Okya, Ceoli. This rant is starting to be a disservice to the readers. We're not going to get any other feedback if it continues, so, we'll give you your points on scientific validity (never the intention anyway) but ding you points on your "confirmation bias" theory. Totally familiar with that and definitely not the case.
I'd be happy to continue the debate/clarification in some other way, but feel it's unfair to the readers to continue it here. We believe our email is public here (?) so feel free, if it really means that much to you.

How many of you ladies have had serious, heartfelt discussions with your mono minded friends and what, if anythin-g, would it have taken to get them to really sit down and analyze their options and choices ?

Are you fucking serious?!

LOL

I can't even go on reading from here without expressing how rude I thought you just were to Ceoli! She had some valid points that she has taken the time to express, where I, personally couldn't be bothered to.

Ah, no. I think this "rant" can continue on quite nicely here, as far as I'm concerned. I have no objection and actually CAN be bothered to read it, now that Ceoli has quite nicely put into words almost exactly what I was thinking and couldn't be bothered to say.

Now I will continue reading, as I am sure there will be something more I will want to say.
 
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I must have missed something here... I thought this was a poly forum? I simply think this whole thread has been misdirected in audience.

I'm sorry, but this topic seems to have come from a place of "personal" frustrations, and not the frustration of men in general. I'll be honest again. I have several mono male friends that complain about being frustrated because they can't get women to date and certainly fuck. News flash to them-- you have to get outside in the world, take care of yourself, and inevitably engage real people to form real relationships. This might be a total tangent, but I see a whole stream of men complaining about things they will never achieve locked in their apartments with the latest add-on to World of Warcraft, Doritos-colored fingers, and walls of pop cans blocking the sun from hitting their pasty faces. What kind of profile pic is that?!

In general, we are the ones to blame for not finding what we need, not "circumstance" or female disinterest.

Women seem to know how to find the men they want and are willing to work on themselves to do it.. It's about time some men figure that out.

Disclaimer: this comment was in no way an attack on gamers. I used to be a total gamer too, even before computers.

Peace and love,
Mono
 
Oh, this has got my heart pumping.

First off, I am so glad to see that the women on this forum have largely come together to express much of what I would. Thanks to them for that!

My husband and I were on an online dating site last year and notice similar bisexual curiosity in some men, also. We even dated one and he discovered that, BINGO, he was not bi at all, but was just curious and straight. We also noticed that there were a lot of bi-curious women AND a lot of cheating men and women. SO WHAT? IT'S A DATING SITE! of course you will find that there.

I agree, it's an insult to all men and women that you make the accusation that women aren't putting out enough and that men have resorted to each other to get their needs met! I thought by saying that my libido happens to be high and that I put out ALOT, that I made MY point clear that women DO LOVE SEX, enough to have more than one partner, sometimes!
 
In hindsight it seems, without this clarification, this was not a productive topic for the readers here. People who are already poly or poly-minded have searched themselves to a degree for answers.
Ya think?

I find it very interesting and significant that that one of your first stated concerns was:

Guys, please don't overwhelm this! Ladies, we NEED your input and thoughts on this desperately.

Be careful what you wish for. You just may get it.
 
Being the philosophical and research-minded people we are, we, whenever possible, take the time to have real in-depth conversations with as many of these people as time permits. The explanations and reasoning form a VERY obvious pattern.

My brother and his girlfriend are PHD students in behavioral biology. They would laugh in your face at this post. Just because YOU have noticed something does not make it a "VERY obvious pattern." Please don't make statements like that without real proof. Perhaps you need to start a research proposal that asks the question, "Do men resort to bisexuality more often because they aren't getting fucked enough by women?" THEN do REAL research and get back to us.

Our only intent in broaching this topic was to try to raise the awareness level, particularly, in the female population, of the true repercussions of their attitudes and actions. To maybe foster a little self analysis by asking the question - "Is this the society I would intentionally choose to foster & live in?"

Is this gap to large to bridge? Do we end up with a world where M/F sex (or any of the other various options, MMF, etc.) exists solely for reproductive purposes? What do we lose by not stretching ourselves a little to form those bonds and understand each other?

Wish we could see more activity on this topic.

I am aware that our society is severely screwed, not because of its women, but because of what people do to each other. We have become a society that wants things "now," is selfish, unempathetic, lazy, ignorant to the world around them, and downright apathetic.

I would in no way say that women are to blame. In fact, if you are having problems with women's attitudes and actions, then you might want to take a good hard look at why this comes up for you, why you see this, what has been done to them that they are acting this way. Chances are it's YOU that has the issue, and they are reacting because of it. Is that not what we are doing on here? Is that not what you have caused by telling Ceoli to "shut up, you are blocking me from my idealized version of what a woman is?"

As far as stretching those bonds to understand each other, you gotta do better than what you have on here and start doing some real hard work sorting yourself out, if you want MY respect.

For what it's worth, in my world, I've had my baby and have no use for reproduction anymore. I am fucking because I love it, and the men I have in my life are good to me, treat me right and allow me to treat them right too. If that goes out of line, I won't have them in my life, just as they wouldn't have me in theirs. There is no sexual difference of any kind. We all like fucking as much as the others. We all like closeness as much as the others. We all like doing a variety of things as much as the others.

To get back to your original post-- there are no differences between men and women, as far as sex goes, just differences in character, personality, and life history that bring us to where we are today.
 
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GroundedSpirit, now that we have totally lambasted you, why are you asking these questions ? :confused: Why do you have this view of women and men as being so different in their desire for sex? Why do you think that men are looking to other men to fulfill their needs, apart from you have "noticed this to be true."
 
groundedspirit, now that we have totally lambasted you....

Why are you asking the questions you do? :confused: why do you have this view of women and men as being so different in their desire for sex and why do you think that men are looking to other men to fulfill their need? Apart from "you have noticed this to be true"

I thought they were pretty clear about it. They seem to think it's because women in our society aren't in touch enough with their sexuality and have bowed to the shackles of repression, whereas men haven't. They are trying to liberate society.


Groundedspirit: You may have noticed the strong reaction in this thread. I'm sure you think it's because you put this to the wrong audience or because people just can't seem to grasp the advanced concepts you're putting out there, but you would be wrong. It's because of HOW you decided to carry out this conversation. You had no interest in listening to any points that didn't line up with what you think should have been said about the topic. You had no interest in exploring the fact that most of us think (and pretty much know) that your initial premise is flawed. (And this ISN'T about being scientific; it's about having CLEAR reasoning.)

Instead of examining that premise, you got defensive and refused to have an actual exchange of ideas about that (because that's not what you wanted to talk about). And honestly, you showed your true colors when you decided to characterize me with the word "femi-nazi" over PM (even if you stuck a little grin next to it). Perhaps you are not so far ahead of the curve as you perceive yourselves to be. Perhaps you would be better off actually ACTIVELY listening to the issues raised in this thread instead of dismissing them. Perhaps you would benefit from little more humility when approaching conversations like this.
 
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Perhaps you would be better off actually ACTIVELY listening to the issues raised in this thread instead of dismissing them. Perhaps you would benefit from little more humility when approaching conversations like this.

Srsly. It's supposed to be all about the JOURNEY, not just the destination.
 
FEMI-NAZI? :mad: Oh no they didn't! *snap!* :mad:

Ceoli, you deserve infinitely more respect and consideration than GroundedSpirit has exhibited. For many, many reasons, but especially in this case for taking the time to engage in an open, honest discussion of this very important and sometimes sensitive issue. As one of the people who have benefitted from the depth of experience and wisdom you've shared on these boards, I want to thank you for being here. Your insight, wisdom and experience are an ongoing source of inspiration to me, and to many others.

GroundedSpirit: you owe Ceoli an apology. And you owe yourself an attitude adjustment. You seem to me to be encouraging the ladies here at the forum to express our thoughts and opinions as long as they agree with yours, and as long as we're willing to STFU when you tell us to. This is an open forum and a community of EQUALS. Deal with it.
 
It seems to me he owes us all an apology at this point, certainly Ceoli, an apology and an explanation, as I am stunned that in this day and age there still exists such women haters! I thought we were over all that. It's like someone has just dropped in from another century. At least enough that men keep their misogynistic crap to themselves and their buddies around the bar! Maybe I am naïve... Probably.

I'd like to know who this "we" is, and what the other half has to say, as this seems rather one-sided. If it is a woman that is your "we," does she know she is being represented in this way? What's the story here?
 
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