My label fell off...

do we really want to live our lives as if "poly," "mono," "dominant," "submissive," "gay," "straight," "bisexual," "introvert," "extrovert," "old," "young," "male," "female," and whatever else we can dream up describes the totality of our being? Fuck, no! Human nature is fluid, not rigid.

exactly!!:)
 
Labels have their place...on cans! Without them you risk many mystery meals :D Labels are not for people unless they chose to give them to themselves.
 
Labels can help. In times of turmoil. They give you a place to stand. If you don't have a label, or confidence. It can be tough to live in the void.

Of course...if you can find a mutually agreed upon place to stand, without labels. That suits the parties involved it can be a nice place. But there needs to be an inner confidence about the overall .. love.

I like labels...but can learn to live without them, as long as I have solid ground to work with. Is this a false way to look at it. Sure, in the end labels mean shit...the don't hold things together and aren't gel. But they can sure be settling at times.

Labels are their own enigma. My opinion on them, like all things is ever changing.
 
Do we really want to live our lives as if "poly," "mono," "dominant," "submissive," "gay," "straight," "bisexual," "introvert," "extrovert," "old," "young," "male," "female," and whatever else we can dream up describes the totality of our being? Fuck, no!


Take out the mono and straight bit and I am all of the above at once! hehe
 
Cranky dyke

I've been mulling over this labeling business recently. I've been contentedly self-labeling as lesbian for 15 years. However, once I began dating SW, my male FWB, I was automatically moved from the lesbian side of the board to the bisexual side in the minds of many people I knew, even though I've been quite open that I still see myself as lesbian. (I put it as amending my dyke card, not throwing it away!)

I guess to many people, even my queer/queer friendly friends, lesbian meant no sex with men, ever, even though most lesbians at some point have had sex with men (including after they come out). I've always understood my sexuality to be fluid so this response from others is profoundly frustrating to me. It takes away my agency to ID myself in ways that make sense to me.

I hope that this is not interpreted as anti-bisexual. Bisexuality is not the problem. It is entirely possible I will evolve into identifying as bi or pansexual (I see definite leanings towards pan in myself) at some point. However, suddenly I seem to be back in grade school where the slightest touch of male cooties makes one contaminated.
 
Labels can help. In times of turmoil. They give you a place to stand. If you don't have a label, or confidence. It can be tough to live in the void . . . Sure, in the end labels mean shit...the don't hold things together and aren't gel. But they can sure be settling at times.
I agree. Maybe I should clarify... I don't object to having or needing labels. What I find problematic is "hiding" behind a label, or assuming things about yourself or someone else because of a label. I see it in NYC so often, I guess, because the population is so diverse. People will make assumptions about you because of the neighborhood you live in or where you came from, as if they understand everything about who you are from that one little picture of you.

Labels are useful and can be very freeing. It's been said that when you give something a name, it no longer holds power over you. I do believe that. When something is no longer an unknown, we can deal with it and it isn't so scary. It becomes manageable. But it represents only a facet of who we are, and so many people forget that and stay stuck, myself included.
 
I walk around with a mental labeler....it helps me arrange/sort people in my mind. I don't voice it, but I keep it secret...keep it safe ;)

I am totally cool with labels being used for myself....as long as I agree with them LOL! If some one is trying to label me against my will I flip out inside and imagine Rob Zombie movies in my head :eek:
 
I walk around with a mental labeler....it helps me arrange/sort people in my mind. I don't voice it, but I keep it secret...keep it safe ;)

I'll have to watch for that labeling strip to come out of your ear ;)
 
LMAO!

(Derby-the male brain isn't near the ear dear)

XOXOXOXOXOXOOXOXOX

hehehe, you all made my night.
giggling to bed, giggling to bed....
 
zombie labels

I am totally cool with labels being used for myself....as long as I agree with them LOL! If some one is trying to label me against my will I flip out inside and imagine Rob Zombie movies in my head :eek:

Well, now I have a new coping mechanism when this happens again! Imagining brains being eaten helps immensely. Thanks Mono! :)
 
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