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Old 10-09-2016, 04:14 AM
ArkansasQueen ArkansasQueen is offline
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Post Arkansas poly newbie

Hi everyone I will try to keep it short and sweet. I've known my BF for 2 years. We are new at being an actual couple and he told me about wanting to try to be poly...he isn't new to it I am. And I love him and I don't judge anyone or anything. I am naturally mono so there is some struggle and worry there. But his girlfriend lives out of State and they will meet soon. We get along well so far. I'm open to any help and questions. Glad I found this site. I've done Alot of research.
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Old 10-09-2016, 10:35 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Greetings ArkansasQueen,
Welcome to our forum. Please feel free to lurk, browse, etc.

Will this be the first time your boyfriend has met up with this other girlfriend? Do you have fears (specific or general) about this meeting? Make sure you communicate with him, communication is important.

We'll try to help however we can.
Sincerely,
Kevin T., "official greeter"

Notes:

There's a *lot* of good info in Golden Nuggets. Have a look!

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Note: You needn't read every reply to your posts, especially if someone posts in a disagreeable way. Given the size and scope of the site it's hard not to run into the occasional disagreeable person. Please contact the mods if you do (or if you see any spam), and you can block the person if you want.

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Welcome aboard!
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Old 10-11-2016, 01:58 PM
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VaughnSupponnatime VaughnSupponnatime is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ArkansasQueen View Post
I've known my BF for 2 years. We are new at being an actual couple and he told me about wanting to try to be poly...he isn't new to it I am. And I love him and I don't judge anyone or anything. I am naturally mono so there is some struggle and worry there. But his girlfriend lives out of State and they will meet soon. We get along well so far. I'm open to any help and questions.
Hi ArkansasQueen,

I guess my questions are all timing-based. Did you know he was poly before you became a couple? Did you know there was a possibility of this becoming a "thing" before you became a couple? How much talking about it did you do before you became a couple? Or did all of this come to fruition AFTER you became a couple?

The base definition of polyamory, besides "many loves", involves the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. If you are not comfortable with him meeting his out of state girlfriend (how long has THAT been a thing?), you need to have a serious talk with him about how you feel and what your concerns/fears are.
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My dynamic:
Myself (Vaughn), straight male, officially poly since 2014...
Involved with P, straight female, known since 2009 but came out to in 2015
Caring for M, heteroflexible female, involved with since 2014
Dating V, straight female
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