themonohub
New member
hello everyone, well all in all i am new to this polyamorous stuff and the site. i'm a 24 yo married guy and been with my wife for 4-5years and married one. we have children together and things are good. we are just like any other young married couple...well, sort of...
how i got here is because of my wife. i am a mono husband and always will be. i'm happy with just one partner and it works for me. honestly, i find more than one partner to be a bit complicated and draining. i can only give myself to one person and my children.
this started about a year ago with my wife. one day she asked me how i would feel if she had a relationship with a guy, sexual in nature. she even brought up a threesome with another male involved. after some talking about if for some time, i agreed. with boundries set she ventured to find a guy. i was a bit apprehensive of the idea and was unsure what i let her do. i had some jealously issues attached as she talked with other men. after many failed attemps with some, she met a guy. she grew attached to him waaaaay too fast and it blew up in her face. she admitted she liked him and wanted more than just sex. she then backed off of the idea for a while. i was relieved as you may guess.
after about 8 months passed she brought up the subject again. we talked some more and discussed it. i had no idea that she already had a guy in her sight. she brought him up one day. we talked and she said he was cute and all this other stuff and she wanted to approach him. i told her it was fine and to just go for it. she seen him one day and gave him her number. that night they talked and from there they hit it off. of course i thought it would be more like a sexual thing.
then recently she brought up that she actually wants a secondary relationship. that she really has been wanting that for over a year or two now. i of course was shocked and a bit set back by this. i thought she just wanted to have sex with a guy or even a threesome. i didn't know what to think of this.
she said she is happy with us and being married. she wouldn't change it for anything. but for the last year or two she has been wanting more. more being a second man in her life. how she would feel more complete if she had this. with me being how i am (mono) i was like, "wow" "really?".
now she has been dating this guy going on 2 months and she tells me it's going great. he is a nice guy and they can talk for hours. she says they have such a connection as he feels the same with her. she thinks this could lead to love. my reaction to this was, "ok?". confusion setting in, i thought you loved me? well she does but says she wants to love someone else too.
now recently they have slept together for the first time. this actually brought them closer and wanting to be with eachother more. she also mentioned he is 11--12 years older than her. of course this shocked me a bit.
i'm generally not a jealous person. my wife is very attractive and is constantly getting looks from men as well as women while we are out. so i usually take it as a compliment when i see a guy stare at her. but with her and the guy she is dating...
how do i keep myself from being jealous and having it consume me?
i noticed she has been a happier person since seeing him. so in turn that makes me happy. that's all i really want. but still...i do worry on how this will affect us.
she thinks this will make us a stronger couple, will it?
i'm ok with her and this relationship she has with him. i'm honestly ok with it and all. but will his age play a factor?
i just have so many questions and thoughts running in my head right now. lol damn...all i can do is laugh...
thanks for reading.
how i got here is because of my wife. i am a mono husband and always will be. i'm happy with just one partner and it works for me. honestly, i find more than one partner to be a bit complicated and draining. i can only give myself to one person and my children.
this started about a year ago with my wife. one day she asked me how i would feel if she had a relationship with a guy, sexual in nature. she even brought up a threesome with another male involved. after some talking about if for some time, i agreed. with boundries set she ventured to find a guy. i was a bit apprehensive of the idea and was unsure what i let her do. i had some jealously issues attached as she talked with other men. after many failed attemps with some, she met a guy. she grew attached to him waaaaay too fast and it blew up in her face. she admitted she liked him and wanted more than just sex. she then backed off of the idea for a while. i was relieved as you may guess.
after about 8 months passed she brought up the subject again. we talked some more and discussed it. i had no idea that she already had a guy in her sight. she brought him up one day. we talked and she said he was cute and all this other stuff and she wanted to approach him. i told her it was fine and to just go for it. she seen him one day and gave him her number. that night they talked and from there they hit it off. of course i thought it would be more like a sexual thing.
then recently she brought up that she actually wants a secondary relationship. that she really has been wanting that for over a year or two now. i of course was shocked and a bit set back by this. i thought she just wanted to have sex with a guy or even a threesome. i didn't know what to think of this.
she said she is happy with us and being married. she wouldn't change it for anything. but for the last year or two she has been wanting more. more being a second man in her life. how she would feel more complete if she had this. with me being how i am (mono) i was like, "wow" "really?".
now she has been dating this guy going on 2 months and she tells me it's going great. he is a nice guy and they can talk for hours. she says they have such a connection as he feels the same with her. she thinks this could lead to love. my reaction to this was, "ok?". confusion setting in, i thought you loved me? well she does but says she wants to love someone else too.
now recently they have slept together for the first time. this actually brought them closer and wanting to be with eachother more. she also mentioned he is 11--12 years older than her. of course this shocked me a bit.
i'm generally not a jealous person. my wife is very attractive and is constantly getting looks from men as well as women while we are out. so i usually take it as a compliment when i see a guy stare at her. but with her and the guy she is dating...
how do i keep myself from being jealous and having it consume me?
i noticed she has been a happier person since seeing him. so in turn that makes me happy. that's all i really want. but still...i do worry on how this will affect us.
she thinks this will make us a stronger couple, will it?
i'm ok with her and this relationship she has with him. i'm honestly ok with it and all. but will his age play a factor?
i just have so many questions and thoughts running in my head right now. lol damn...all i can do is laugh...
thanks for reading.