Secondary who's newish to poly- where do I fit in?

What should I call myself then? I'm open to suggestions!

You are his lover. We just had this same problem. The legally married called themselves primaries when really it made no sense since we spent more time with our lovers. I now call him my romantic husband. You will find your niche.

I recommend meeting her. What if he is a snake? Not to mention if you want it to be serious you will have to meet her to meet his child.
 
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