MsEmotional
Member
I am having a difficult time knowing where to stop when it comes to polyamory.
I have three partners — a husband and two boyfriends. Despite feeling pretty busy and without room for additional partners, I have been swiping around on OkCupid lately, just out of curiosity and because I felt like I had some extra time on my hands because one of my partners just had a baby. My profile is set to looking only for friends, so it doesn’t get a lot of attention anyway.
Well, I happened to meet someone that I have really clicked with, and the excitement of the prospect of being with a woman (I originally was drawn to polyamory with the desire to have a relationship with a woman, but thus far have only gotten past the first date with men) has made all feelings of polysaturation go out the window. I check my phone for messages from her every 15 min. I am positively blushing as I write this....and our first date hasn’t even happened yet (although it is scheduled). She asked if I was polysaturated and I wanted to say, “yes....but I will make an exception for you!” (I didn’t put it in those terms but I explained why having Whiskers be temporarily unavailable due to having a new baby makes it difficult for me to say for sure whether I can manage an additional relationship).
It has made me wonder if experienced poly folks are better at not getting caught up in the frenzy. Everyone else seems so much more....stable. It feels like I can’t just *ignore* OKCupid...because every time I pay it a little attention, I end up meeting someone cool. And how can I ignore all these potential friends and crushes and lovers? The FOMO is real.
Is this a normal stage of becoming polyamorous that will pass as I become more mature? Or is it more of a set personality type? Am I an NRE junkie?
I have three partners — a husband and two boyfriends. Despite feeling pretty busy and without room for additional partners, I have been swiping around on OkCupid lately, just out of curiosity and because I felt like I had some extra time on my hands because one of my partners just had a baby. My profile is set to looking only for friends, so it doesn’t get a lot of attention anyway.
Well, I happened to meet someone that I have really clicked with, and the excitement of the prospect of being with a woman (I originally was drawn to polyamory with the desire to have a relationship with a woman, but thus far have only gotten past the first date with men) has made all feelings of polysaturation go out the window. I check my phone for messages from her every 15 min. I am positively blushing as I write this....and our first date hasn’t even happened yet (although it is scheduled). She asked if I was polysaturated and I wanted to say, “yes....but I will make an exception for you!” (I didn’t put it in those terms but I explained why having Whiskers be temporarily unavailable due to having a new baby makes it difficult for me to say for sure whether I can manage an additional relationship).
It has made me wonder if experienced poly folks are better at not getting caught up in the frenzy. Everyone else seems so much more....stable. It feels like I can’t just *ignore* OKCupid...because every time I pay it a little attention, I end up meeting someone cool. And how can I ignore all these potential friends and crushes and lovers? The FOMO is real.
Is this a normal stage of becoming polyamorous that will pass as I become more mature? Or is it more of a set personality type? Am I an NRE junkie?