KatTails
New member
Day 5 of no fighting with 2rings - that's a record for us lately. 2rings and I had a very intense, emotional talk on Saturday night and I feel like we have finally started moving forward. Everything that I have done over the past two years to understand and accept MG being in his life and the changes to our marriage that that causes - have failed. I have consciously and unconsciously done things to control their relationship and the impact it had on me. Everything I have done, all the emotions that I let get out of control and all the hurtful words I have said have backfired on me. While I do not take full blame for our marriage falling apart - I do recognize and admit my part in it.
2rings has often recited this quote to me: "the definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Well - that's what I've been doing and it hasn't worked out well for me. So - I have made the decision to submit to 2rings, to confront my fears and insecurities, and to allow life to happen instead of trying to control it. Its time I move on and find happiness in this new marriage and this new reality.
I have already started making the changes that I need to in order to move forward to a happier life: I've started exercising more regularly, being more aware of what I'm eating, started a new medication for my depression, I've started looking into taking a class and we start marriage counseling on Saturday.
Here are a few quotes from Radical Acceptance that have touched me and caused me to reevaluate my life and marriage:
"When the resistance is gone, the demons are gone."
"In bringing a clear and comprehensive awareness to our situation, we begin to accept our wanting self with compassion. This frees us to move forward, to break out of old patterns."
"We watch ourselves sabotage intimate relationships when we are driven by neediness and insecurity."
"It doesn't matter what is happening. What matters is how we are relating to our experience."
"If we are taken over by craving, no matter who or what is before us, all we can see is how it might satisfy our needs. This kind of thirst contracts our body and mind into a profound trance. We move through the world with a kind of tunnel vision that prevents us from enjoying what is in front of us."
2rings has often recited this quote to me: "the definition of crazy is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Well - that's what I've been doing and it hasn't worked out well for me. So - I have made the decision to submit to 2rings, to confront my fears and insecurities, and to allow life to happen instead of trying to control it. Its time I move on and find happiness in this new marriage and this new reality.
I have already started making the changes that I need to in order to move forward to a happier life: I've started exercising more regularly, being more aware of what I'm eating, started a new medication for my depression, I've started looking into taking a class and we start marriage counseling on Saturday.
Here are a few quotes from Radical Acceptance that have touched me and caused me to reevaluate my life and marriage:
"When the resistance is gone, the demons are gone."
"In bringing a clear and comprehensive awareness to our situation, we begin to accept our wanting self with compassion. This frees us to move forward, to break out of old patterns."
"We watch ourselves sabotage intimate relationships when we are driven by neediness and insecurity."
"It doesn't matter what is happening. What matters is how we are relating to our experience."
"If we are taken over by craving, no matter who or what is before us, all we can see is how it might satisfy our needs. This kind of thirst contracts our body and mind into a profound trance. We move through the world with a kind of tunnel vision that prevents us from enjoying what is in front of us."
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