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View Poll Results: What is the configuration of your relationship?
Single 3 4.62%
Closed couple 5 7.69%
Swingers 0 0%
Couple and dating with no serious outside partners 8 12.31%
V, N, or etc 36 55.38%
Triad, quad, etc 9 13.85%
other 4 6.15%
Voters: 65. You may not vote on this poll

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Old 09-26-2013, 05:32 PM
drinnt's Avatar
drinnt drinnt is offline
Join Date: Sep 2013
Location: New England
Posts: 58

I'm in a quad for the past 6 months...we all just acknowledged it as the poly quad that it is a week ago...we all come from swinger backgrounds so it took a while to make the leap in realizing what we were all a part of.
J - my wife & partner since 2000
D - R's wife & my unfortunately ex-girlfriend :-(
R - D's soon to be ex-husband & J's boyfriend
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Old 09-26-2013, 06:16 PM
Cherub's Avatar
Cherub Cherub is offline
Join Date: Aug 2013
Location: Upstate New York
Posts: 31

I checked Couple dating not serious.

In fact we are currently a closed couple in practice, but she is looking and hoping to become a MFM Vee with her as the hinge.

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Old 09-26-2013, 06:19 PM
1of4 1of4 is offline
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 33

A poly quad as well. In an exclusive (polyfidelitous) relationship for 2+ years. Following Steve's example, I may put this in my sig file eventually, but for now (fake names):

Jay - my husband for 20+ years
Lee - my boyfriend for 2+ years and Kay's husband for 15+
Kay - Jay's girlfriend and Lee's wife
Em - me
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Old 09-26-2013, 09:18 PM
WhatToDo WhatToDo is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2013
Posts: 157

I don't even know how to describe what I'm in. I'm married, she is currently mono. I'm dating a women who is married and both she and her husband are poly. I guess you would say we're both each other's secondary relationship. It still confuses me.
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Old 09-26-2013, 10:03 PM
Confused Confused is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Posts: 158

I'm married to my husband (11years married, 15together) and in a long distance romantic friendship with my ex. I'm afraid that's the best way I can describe it, we email and chat a lot and when he visits 3-4 times a year we fool around all three of us. He has a partner who used to be in a v with him and her husband but split with her husband and now the two of them live together.
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Old 09-26-2013, 11:42 PM
sterling119 sterling119 is offline
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Grand Blanc Michigan
Posts: 52

v with wife D as the hinge and J as her "other husband" all late 40's
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Old 09-27-2013, 12:25 AM
opalescent opalescent is offline
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: US
Posts: 2,198

Whip and I are an open couple. He is also a swinger - I'm not into swinging although I do enjoy casual sex. He has a couple of BDSM play partners right now - one of whom I think he would like to be more significant. I do not know if that will happen or not. I had a brief play partner but that has faded away. I'm not looking real hard for other partners, casual or more serious, but am open if things develop.

Last edited by opalescent; 09-27-2013 at 12:27 AM. Reason: more info!
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Old 09-27-2013, 12:34 AM
CattivaGattina CattivaGattina is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 398

Confused. Married. Ex-boyfriend and I still completely in love with each other and waiting for him to get out of hell in a handbasket for us to figure us out again.
Cattiva: Me
Woodsmith: My husband
Tighearn: boyfriend/dom
Merry: Tig's wife/slave
N8: Merry's boyfriend/owner
Elle: N8 girlfriend
Ruby: Part of the Leather Family
Logan: Leather Sir in the Family
Arc: Logan's boy
Holly: Leather family
K: Holly's sub
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Old 09-27-2013, 08:08 PM
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sdguitarguy sdguitarguy is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: San Diego
Posts: 122

I guess I'll add that C & I started as swingers. We moved to an open relationship as we become more comfortable with loving independently of each other. My relationships tend to be longer and more intimate than C's (interestingly we were mutually envious of each other's relationships). A few months ago I met M and this relationship has become closer and more serious than any of my previous (outside of C). We're working on the logistics and how to make this work for all of us.
Solo poly
Me, Dino: 58 single straight male
Liza:42, married, straight
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Old 09-29-2013, 01:07 AM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
Official Greeter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Yelm, Washington
Posts: 15,203

I'm in a "closed poly-fi hetero MFM V." Closed and polyfidelitous in the sense that we do not have sex outside the bounds of our three-person unit. However, we're not closed to the idea of growing to a four-person unit (such as an N) or what have you. However, a new person wouldn't be added quickly and all four of us would need to get along well. And, none of us are looking for anyone new to date, so we'll probably always be "just a V."

Our three people are:
  • brother-husband (one arm of the V and legally wedded to snowbunny)
  • snowbunny (the hinge of the V and legally wedded to brother-husband)
  • kdt26417 (I, me, the other arm of the V and author of this post)
We've been friends since about 1995, together as a V since early 2006, and handfasted on August 30 of 2009.

This V is the first time any of us have tried on a poly life for size. We were all monogamous prior to that. Our first few years as a V were, well, turbulent, but we have thankfully settled since then into a state of boring poly bliss.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
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