YouAreHere
Well-known member
Oy.
Well, boy, is the stress beginning to ramp up.
Let's see...
First of all, my sisters are planning to fly out and stay with me in October, which isn't a stressful thing in and of itself. My baby sister and her BF are flying out, renting a car, and I'll probably have to find an air mattress (or two) so there's room for all of us that weekend.
My middle sister (the one who was having drug problems and abusive BF problems in the past) is doing better for herself, and I'm happy for that. She bought her flight out, but no return flight (which worried me a bit), but she's looking forward to seeing everyone, yadda yadda.
I try poking to see when she's flying back, and I get a text stating that her BF now has a ticket out (and, I'm assuming, no ticket back). This is the abusive one. He's apparently "found God". We'll see...
So now this makes 8 people in the house over the weekend (including Chops and the two kids). One of whom I don't trust, so he's not staying in the house unsupervised (although what we'll do at night when they keep going in and out for smoke breaks is beyond me). Sigh.
Not quite sure how they're going to afford a return flight, since my sister is behind on her RENT, and is asking me for help. I helped earlier this month. Couldn't swing it again (rent is weekly). Felt like an ass, but also didn't like feeling like I'm her fall-back plan when things go wrong, rather than growing up and taking control of her OWN life.
Sigh... So here I am feeling like the bad guy on the phone with her yesterday, telling her that no, I have my own bills to pay. Ugh.
And she plans to buy her return flight(s) with her next two checks. I neglected to ask how she was going to pay her rent.
So help me, if I have to shell out for a bus ticket to get them home afterward, I will.
So, I have family stress and financial stress - trying to dig myself out of my own financial hole, slowly, but winter is coming, which means fuel, chimney maintenance, and related things, and getting asked for help in the meantime doesn't help my own situation any. Plus, Chops has been running himself ragged taking Xena to and from the airport recently, and with my stress level raised, I'm getting aggravated with how it impacted our time together (lack of sleep is a bitch). This weekend, they're out camping, and I'm feeling the pinch for time with him again... Friday would have been our night together, so I'd like to reschedule, but the calendar is so dorked up right now, we can't find a good time to do it.
Just... ugh. Stressed out in general, and feeling the pinch for time with Chops (and feeling a lack of sleep!), and it just leads to me feeling less than charitable about Xena.
Yeah, it's not fair that I put it on her. I know that... Still, that old resentment and old habits die hard, and I just get pissy with her for the circumstance, rather than getting pissy in general. I'm trying not to let that flow into my interactions with Chops, and I'm really not interacting with her much right now, so I'm hoping that next week, when things start evening out, the emotions will settle.
Monday, I'm taking a half-day, and Chops and I are spending the day together. That will definitely help recharge the love bucket.
So... I've felt on the hairy edge of holding it all in the past few days, and things with my sister damn near pushed it over the edge yesterday. I've gone from looking forward to having my sisters up next month, to worrying what I'm going to do about the BF, and how we're going to get them the hell home without me taking a week off from work to do it. I will need to sell my mom's car before they get here, or my sister's BF will want to use it to get around. I am tempted to just hide everything of value that isn't nailed down, and I absolutely hate having to think that way (given past performance). Just... ugh.
Add to that the pile of stuff I've WANTED to get through, and just haven't had the time, and I'm ready to just curl up, go to bed, and stay there for a week.
But that's not going to help any.
On the plus side, PokéGirl learned to ride a bike last weekend. On the minus side, her big sister felt she was "rubbing it in" (because DanceGirl was finally getting used to an adult bike for the first time), and got aggravated. You win some, you lose some, I guess. I feel badly that their dad doesn't encourage them to go out and do this stuff (hence, DanceGirl's 5-year hiatus from bike riding), but I'm glad that they now have bikes at my house, and they can keep it up.
The downstairs bathroom is mid-renovation right now (which also needs to get finished before everyone stays with me - AAA!), but once we find some more time to bang away at it, and get the floor done, it should get finished fairly soon. Fingers crossed.
Sigh.
Anyway, just needed to vent. I normally love the Fall, but 'tis the beginning of the holiday season, as far as I'm concerned. My daughter's birthday and Samhain next month (and the family adventure), birthdays and Thanksgiving in November, and then the craziness REALLY begins.
That "staying in bed for a week" thing is starting to sound more and more attractive.
Hope you all are doing well.
Edited to add: Well, now I get a text stating that middle sis just got out of the emergency room. The cynical side of me thinks the timing is extremely suspect, but I really have no clue what happened. Baby sis is on the ball and able to respond to her texts (I can't check texts regularly right now). Just... man. I'm surprised I don't spend my days drunk.
Well, boy, is the stress beginning to ramp up.
Let's see...
First of all, my sisters are planning to fly out and stay with me in October, which isn't a stressful thing in and of itself. My baby sister and her BF are flying out, renting a car, and I'll probably have to find an air mattress (or two) so there's room for all of us that weekend.
My middle sister (the one who was having drug problems and abusive BF problems in the past) is doing better for herself, and I'm happy for that. She bought her flight out, but no return flight (which worried me a bit), but she's looking forward to seeing everyone, yadda yadda.
I try poking to see when she's flying back, and I get a text stating that her BF now has a ticket out (and, I'm assuming, no ticket back). This is the abusive one. He's apparently "found God". We'll see...
So now this makes 8 people in the house over the weekend (including Chops and the two kids). One of whom I don't trust, so he's not staying in the house unsupervised (although what we'll do at night when they keep going in and out for smoke breaks is beyond me). Sigh.
Not quite sure how they're going to afford a return flight, since my sister is behind on her RENT, and is asking me for help. I helped earlier this month. Couldn't swing it again (rent is weekly). Felt like an ass, but also didn't like feeling like I'm her fall-back plan when things go wrong, rather than growing up and taking control of her OWN life.
Sigh... So here I am feeling like the bad guy on the phone with her yesterday, telling her that no, I have my own bills to pay. Ugh.
And she plans to buy her return flight(s) with her next two checks. I neglected to ask how she was going to pay her rent.
So help me, if I have to shell out for a bus ticket to get them home afterward, I will.
So, I have family stress and financial stress - trying to dig myself out of my own financial hole, slowly, but winter is coming, which means fuel, chimney maintenance, and related things, and getting asked for help in the meantime doesn't help my own situation any. Plus, Chops has been running himself ragged taking Xena to and from the airport recently, and with my stress level raised, I'm getting aggravated with how it impacted our time together (lack of sleep is a bitch). This weekend, they're out camping, and I'm feeling the pinch for time with him again... Friday would have been our night together, so I'd like to reschedule, but the calendar is so dorked up right now, we can't find a good time to do it.
Just... ugh. Stressed out in general, and feeling the pinch for time with Chops (and feeling a lack of sleep!), and it just leads to me feeling less than charitable about Xena.
Yeah, it's not fair that I put it on her. I know that... Still, that old resentment and old habits die hard, and I just get pissy with her for the circumstance, rather than getting pissy in general. I'm trying not to let that flow into my interactions with Chops, and I'm really not interacting with her much right now, so I'm hoping that next week, when things start evening out, the emotions will settle.
Monday, I'm taking a half-day, and Chops and I are spending the day together. That will definitely help recharge the love bucket.
So... I've felt on the hairy edge of holding it all in the past few days, and things with my sister damn near pushed it over the edge yesterday. I've gone from looking forward to having my sisters up next month, to worrying what I'm going to do about the BF, and how we're going to get them the hell home without me taking a week off from work to do it. I will need to sell my mom's car before they get here, or my sister's BF will want to use it to get around. I am tempted to just hide everything of value that isn't nailed down, and I absolutely hate having to think that way (given past performance). Just... ugh.
Add to that the pile of stuff I've WANTED to get through, and just haven't had the time, and I'm ready to just curl up, go to bed, and stay there for a week.
But that's not going to help any.
On the plus side, PokéGirl learned to ride a bike last weekend. On the minus side, her big sister felt she was "rubbing it in" (because DanceGirl was finally getting used to an adult bike for the first time), and got aggravated. You win some, you lose some, I guess. I feel badly that their dad doesn't encourage them to go out and do this stuff (hence, DanceGirl's 5-year hiatus from bike riding), but I'm glad that they now have bikes at my house, and they can keep it up.
The downstairs bathroom is mid-renovation right now (which also needs to get finished before everyone stays with me - AAA!), but once we find some more time to bang away at it, and get the floor done, it should get finished fairly soon. Fingers crossed.
Sigh.
Anyway, just needed to vent. I normally love the Fall, but 'tis the beginning of the holiday season, as far as I'm concerned. My daughter's birthday and Samhain next month (and the family adventure), birthdays and Thanksgiving in November, and then the craziness REALLY begins.
That "staying in bed for a week" thing is starting to sound more and more attractive.
Hope you all are doing well.
Edited to add: Well, now I get a text stating that middle sis just got out of the emergency room. The cynical side of me thinks the timing is extremely suspect, but I really have no clue what happened. Baby sis is on the ball and able to respond to her texts (I can't check texts regularly right now). Just... man. I'm surprised I don't spend my days drunk.
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