no Worries
Thanks Dirtclustit. I really didn't mean to get everyone stirred up in this way.
It wasn't anything you did to get everyone stirred up. It's semantical bullshit, although that's just my opinion, but many people people around here call and couple desiring a triad "unicorn hunters" which is fine, and I completely understand that many people have done unrepairable damage to their relationships, I just disagree that it was the triad configuration that is the problem. I view Franklin as a typical punk male blogger, but on top of that, also seems to be a part of -- what I see as -- a very destructive grammarian movement to narrowly define "right polyamory".
But there is a whole web filled with foolish advice, it's not only that I disagree with his views on poly, I disagree with -- again what I see -- as attempts to influence "poly communities" into drawing up plans as to what/who is acceptable and what/who should be afflicted with shit, and I view that as wrong even if you are involved with the person or at least indirectly connected through metamours.
I have very black and white views of wrongful discrimination and feel he takes an ignorant view of the definition of bigotry, the male rape culture we live in, and just in general his way of -- again what I see -- mind fucking people for fun.
But to keep it on topic with triads and poly, my view is poly is more focused on love, NOT sex, and taking any relationship into a sexual relationships prematurely will cause problems if your intention is for the relationship to be based on love, with sex being a natural extension of that love. It's not rocket science, it's love, and to pretend that it is some specific failure that requires a bill of rights does nothing but mock what a loving relationship is all about.
He is entertainment, but not something I would take seriously as to "how to do poly" unless you like being the butt of his jokes or target of his jabs and online belittling.
The bottom line is, his plausible deniability and weak disclaimers do not excuse the fact that adults and their consented relationships are only their business, and attempting to influence other knowledgeable adults' relationships is the same type of crap that poly people have faced from society.
He is good at describing problems that appear relevant, but their relevance is usually purely semantical and not based in reality nor are they actual problems in the dynamics to trashes. Everyone knows that if you treat someone like an asshole, it generally isn't going to work out
on that note, he is a shining example of the painfully fucking obvious, yet it's worded in subtle, belittling ways to appear as if he is superior, all while denying it completely which equals one big poly mind fuck, which some people like or at least find humorous, whereas as I don't like it, nor do I find it funny, nor do I care about peoples opinions who find it offensive for my views, I would gladly ignore him like the rest of the yahoos if he kept his subtle hand out private electronic places, and that goes for every idiot author on the wide world of the internet's web.
or did I say too much again?
oh fucking well,
It wasn't anything you did or said River Dwellers, trust me, my opinion of punk polyamory was well formed long long ago, in the seemingly distant galaxy of Oregon
what's he going to do, talk more shit? absofuckinglutely positively impossible, all more bullshit past a point -- which was many many moons ago -- reached a mathematical limit as it approached the numerical value of infinity long before I even had a computer with an internet connection