I felt our conversation last night was good. The only thing I'm concerned about is putting a time limit on it. Saying "well, lets give it one month, and if I don't feel better about it, it's off". I'm willing to work with that, I think it's fair that he is giving it more time, but I'm also afraid that he will just "make it" through the month knowing it can come to an end, rather than really honestly try and work through these feelings.
I'm also concerned that knowing that there is a time limit, I'll be trying to cram everything I can into it because in a month, it might be over.
I think one of the better aspects of last night was where we switched from looking at it in a negative light, to a positive one. What has REALLY changed in all of this? Looking at the big picture, the bottom line. I still am the same person. He is still the same person, and we still have that amazing dynamic between us. The sex is better and far more frequent. There is a deeper level of emotional connection. The big thing that's changed... time. I have to share my time between them.
It doesn't help that I've had extra derby things going on the last week, and have been slammed with work orders that also has me out running errands to get supplies. So my time is already spread pretty thin. I'm taking some time off of work because my family is way more important to me than making some extra money.
The guys never really did much together before all of this. I mean, J would come over and they would play video games and what not, but I was pretty much always here. When I was out of town for a week or so they hung out a lot.. but I don't leave too often. They work together (though not on the same shift right now), so they see each other there. Perhaps we need to work on getting them some more dude-bro time.
I'm also concerned that knowing that there is a time limit, I'll be trying to cram everything I can into it because in a month, it might be over.
I think one of the better aspects of last night was where we switched from looking at it in a negative light, to a positive one. What has REALLY changed in all of this? Looking at the big picture, the bottom line. I still am the same person. He is still the same person, and we still have that amazing dynamic between us. The sex is better and far more frequent. There is a deeper level of emotional connection. The big thing that's changed... time. I have to share my time between them.
It doesn't help that I've had extra derby things going on the last week, and have been slammed with work orders that also has me out running errands to get supplies. So my time is already spread pretty thin. I'm taking some time off of work because my family is way more important to me than making some extra money.
The guys never really did much together before all of this. I mean, J would come over and they would play video games and what not, but I was pretty much always here. When I was out of town for a week or so they hung out a lot.. but I don't leave too often. They work together (though not on the same shift right now), so they see each other there. Perhaps we need to work on getting them some more dude-bro time.