Yes, I have been with men who are focused on "giving" me orgasms as a point of pride.
Pride? "Giving?" Why are you being so dismissive? Why kick someone for giving a gift? I love gifts. And why does it have to be "pride?" Why can't it be satisfaction, vicarious pleasure? I mean, yeah, some guys can be jerks about sex in general, but "giving a gift" of an orgasm just doesn't sound like ever a negative thing to me. Unless you're entirely into tantra and think orgasms are bad.
Also, there are some women who are more like men. One orgasm and sex is over. In that case, I can seeing delaying your ONE orgasm. I am talking more about women's potential to be multi- or mega-orgasmic.
Orgasms are lovely, but they are not the measure of a fulfilling sexual experience...
No one is saying they are.
... and many men seem to think that doling out an orgasm is a feather in their cap and all that great sex requires. Call me sexist, but I have never been with a woman sexually who has this limited scope and such ego wrapped up in this one aspect of sex.
Hm, I've never seen that, and I've been with many many men. If a man says to me, "Of course, the lady cums first," when we are getting to know each other, I explain to him I usually need way more than one orgasm to feel satisfied. I tell him part of the fun of being with me is making me cum over and over, and making a big fun mess with my ejaculation. If he doesn't want that, he's not the right guy for me.
To me, orgasm-centric sex is what's cold and boring. It's much too goal oriented. Orgasms have always been part of my sex life and I've actually never been with a man (over the span of five decades!) who had the neanderthal view that women didn't want them or could have them or whatever silly myths are floating around. Maybe it's my San Francisco upbringing, but all of that orgasms-for-men-only crap is positively Victorian. Good grief, is that still a thing?
hahahahaha. Yes. The patriarchy exists, outside of your liberal bubble. Surely you know that? Look at the Middle East and Africa. They still cut off clitorises!
Every man claims to be a giver these days ...
Lucky you, in San Francisco.
- to the point where giving an orgasm is what's become predictable and way too results oriented for my liking. The many and varied aspects of sexual and emotional connection and exploration are what send off my rockets - and not evaluating sex by the single measure of how many orgasms were racked up.
Again, no one is saying orgasms are all there is to sex.
So, yes, I have experience being with men who are way too orgasm focused (both for themselves and for me.) Orgasms aren't verboten in my book, but I am so over putting them center stage. I love for sex to go on and on and on all day - with the emphasis on the connection. My very traditional BF blew his world right open when we discovered this and together we are having the best sex of our not so young lives.
I also like "sex" to go on all day, if by that you mean building the energy. Sure. That doesn't contradict my opinion. If you're not multi-orgasmic and one orgasm ends your sexual energy for the day, well then, I can see how you'd avoid one until you were good and ready for sex to be over for the day, or week, or whatever.