Age differences and metamour relations

It's a line between "dating as formal activities" and "relationship as part of one's life" that I've noticed in your writing you very much don't cross, but I prefer to. Different strokes...

I actually do cross that line when it's warranted. My boyfriend is a "relationship as part of my life" person; he and I have made commitments to each other, and I consider him a large part of my life. It was the same with Facets, and with S2 way back when I dated him.

I just have a different way of looking at "part of one's life" than you, I guess... I don't see my life as one big overarching thing. I compartmentalize, which might not be the best thing, but that's how I've always been. My marriage is one compartment. It's part of my life, and Hubby is part of my life, but no one else is part of my marriage. My relationships with my kids, while obviously a different type of relationship, are part of my life and so are my kids, but no one else is part of my relationships with my kids. Hubby has his own relationships with them; he isn't part of *my* relationships with them and I'm not part of his. My boyfriend has somewhat of a parentish relationship with Alt but not with Country, because that's how each of them has chosen to interact with him, and that's their choice. My kids never met Facets, and neither did Hubby. I don't think Alt ever met S2, though that's so long ago now I can't really remember.

My partners also don't generally come to my home, by Hubby's preference and by mine, so it's easier for me to keep things separate. I'm not particularly comfortable having *anyone* visit my home; that isn't exclusive to partners.

So in my worldview, someone can be part of my life, and the relationship with them can be part of my life rather than just dating, and still not overlap with other parts of my life. My life isn't one big sphere in which many things exist; it's more like a Venn diagram where different things exist in different spheres, and certain spheres overlap but others don't.

Thanks for explaining your view on having people meet your kid. That makes sense.
 
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