I mean deep, like, his needs and wants and regarding how he schedules time away from her. This is a topic they've never had to consider before, as he's never had the feels for anyone else, where she has had a long term boyfriend for a while.
How long... Hmmm since the 24th. His wife & i were drinking & she brought up his reluctance to talk with her about scheduling because of her previous fragile behavior..... And how she is over that & totally hoping I get him out of their house more, with some boundaries and consideration for her re: advance notice.
I them invited him over & conveyed his wife's message to me, as well as her requirements.... And procrastination. He is dragging his heels & I want to encourage him to pick up his step..... But in the manner that causes him the least stress possible. Especially as his wife has already brought it up with me
I think he's a little scared, unwilling to let himself believe that his wife is Ok with both talking about and the act of sharing her husband, because he wants it so badly and dreads roadblocks, so he hopes, rather than acts.
Thank you for reminding me to consider my goals when striving to be more patient.
I'm going to see his wife again this weekend (it will be the third weekend in a row she & I spend time together) ... So I hope she will bring up he & I spending time with each other and give me an opportunity to gauge her outlook and attitude without either of us being liquored LOL
He has made it very clear that she and I are welcome to discuss anything & everything.... So if she opens up and wants to talk to me directly, or even schedule with me directly that would be awesome. He would be quite content to have the pair of us that close, and we are both bossy, so she & I would be content scheduling his time for him.
Sorry for rambling, thank you for your perspective