cosmicfreedom7
New member
Thought I would take a moment to introduce myself and say hello.
I've known I was different for a very long time but never put a poly name to it until my early 20's. I'm now nudging 40 although age is just a number and I still feel in my 20's. I've had very close intimate relationships with both sexes in addition to my husband however all have been online and never crossed that threshold into one on one real time which has always been a frustration. I thought I might have found my first recently but seems he wasn't mature enough or ready enough to handle me.
It's hard dealing with the reality of wanting something so bad but never finding the connection to make it a reality. I still have hope for the future though. Unfortunately I'm in a small city in a small province and while I'm sure there are people out there, there doesn't seem to be any way to connect to them. Add to the fact I have two young children, one with special needs and the time and opportunity factor goes out the window. All my friends have either moved or de-evolved or are online so social connections are out.
I'm technically "in the closet" as no one outside my inner circle are aware of my needs. My family has a fair number of issues including power struggles, emotional hurt and talking too much out their butts so until I have a reason to say something, I'm keeping things quiet. My kids will definitely be raised to know they are loved and supported no matter what they close to do or who and how they love.
I'm happy to have found this forum where I can read what others are dealing with or are experiencing and not feel so secluded with my own thoughts.
Hope you are all having a wonderful weekend and enjoying what life is offering.
I've known I was different for a very long time but never put a poly name to it until my early 20's. I'm now nudging 40 although age is just a number and I still feel in my 20's. I've had very close intimate relationships with both sexes in addition to my husband however all have been online and never crossed that threshold into one on one real time which has always been a frustration. I thought I might have found my first recently but seems he wasn't mature enough or ready enough to handle me.
It's hard dealing with the reality of wanting something so bad but never finding the connection to make it a reality. I still have hope for the future though. Unfortunately I'm in a small city in a small province and while I'm sure there are people out there, there doesn't seem to be any way to connect to them. Add to the fact I have two young children, one with special needs and the time and opportunity factor goes out the window. All my friends have either moved or de-evolved or are online so social connections are out.
I'm technically "in the closet" as no one outside my inner circle are aware of my needs. My family has a fair number of issues including power struggles, emotional hurt and talking too much out their butts so until I have a reason to say something, I'm keeping things quiet. My kids will definitely be raised to know they are loved and supported no matter what they close to do or who and how they love.
I'm happy to have found this forum where I can read what others are dealing with or are experiencing and not feel so secluded with my own thoughts.
Hope you are all having a wonderful weekend and enjoying what life is offering.