BDsm

Kittens, I am a switch. I get off on domestic service to my gf. I love to make her coffee and serve it to her. Declutter her house, do her laundry, clean her small rodents' cages, sweep floors, light incense, do dishes (I actually hate doing dishes, but when it's for her... it's different.) Lotion her feet and legs. Bathe her and shave her pubes.

Also I love when she gets in a mood and "rapes" me late at night, fists me, fucks me hard and dominantly, and beats my willing ass to a pulp.

:D

On the other hand, I also love when I have a date w a boytoy and she gets off on me having been off acting the Sex Goddess with someone else. And I enjoy wrapping her in Saran Wrap, blindfolding her, and doing sensation play, ice, wax, feathers, fur, sitting on her face, gradually tearing away the Saran to expose her ass, which might have a plug in it. Exposing her nipples and sucking on them. Beating her good and hard til she whimpers and cries. Exposing her coochie and sucking and fingering it til she cums... hard. Then of course, unwrapping her and having the cuddly aftercare session.... mmmm

Mmmm, I love being a switch.
 
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This is just here because I'm not sure where else to post it. I had a dream last night where I was with a group of people and I wanted to do something (can't remember what exactly) and someone in the group (which was a person who I had seen irl earlier in the day but don't really know) said to me "shouldn't you be asking your owner permission first?" (referring to redpepper) I couldn't stick around in the group after that, my feeling is that I'm my own person and no one owns me. I think that's my biggest fear of becoming involved with bdsm at all is that I will somehow become the property of someone else.

I just wanted to get that out since it's been on my mind this morning. Thanks!

-Derby
 
This is just here because I'm not sure where else to post it. I had a dream last night where I was with a group of people and I wanted to do something (can't remember what exactly) and someone in the group (which was a person who I had seen irl earlier in the day but don't really know) said to me "shouldn't you be asking your owner permission first?" (referring to redpepper) I couldn't stick around in the group after that, my feeling is that I'm my own person and no one owns me. I think that's my biggest fear of becoming involved with bdsm at all is that I will somehow become the property of someone else.

I just wanted to get that out since it's been on my mind this morning. Thanks!

-Derby

Thats a great dream, and in such detail.

You have the right to whatever you want in your own bdsm listing. Just make hard rules like "I don't not want to be referred to as property and am not owned by anyone"...some people like that, and some don't. Don't only come up with or explore your potential fetishes, find things you don't like and list them.

http://www.thebrc.net/check_list/default.htm

Create your own bdsm checklist and hold it to truth. Be as flexible as YOU want to be. I may eventually sub for someone, but I have the same hang up. For the longest time, when I discussed personal submission, it was only ever a physical contest for me. I would only submit if someone could actually force me to. While I have never submitted to someone, this has been modified quite a bit to be more inclusive.

Some people live the lifestyle, some people live the lifestyle in the bedroom and others play. :)
 
When you haven't really participated in any way before it's a little hard to know where your limits are. I have so much to learn and I don't even feel like I have the tools to know what to ask.
 
I think that's my biggest fear of becoming involved with bdsm at all is that I will somehow become the property of someone else.



-Derby

BDSM can be as much dress up and play with no lingering dynamic if you chose it to be. I am very submissive at events and love the idea of being owned by Redpepper during these times. You can have fun with it for sure. And you don't need to go as a submissive to anyone. Lots of our friends just go to watch but enjoy dressing up. I have other friends that live it 24 and 7.

I'll stay on the leash...GRRRR...you can just have fun...besides, I might need a nurse if Redpepper has built up any more strenght by the next event...I like it heavy and hard :eek:
 
When you haven't really participated in any way before it's a little hard to know where your limits are. I have so much to learn and I don't even feel like I have the tools to know what to ask.

Limits?...my nipples are a no go zone pretty much...and sharp little smacks on my lilly white butt sting like crazy! Other then that you could pretty much beat the shit out of me with a wiffle bat :D
 
BDSM can be as much dress up and play with no lingering dynamic if you chose it to be. I am very submissive at events and love the idea of being owned by Redpepper during these times. You can have fun with it for sure. And you don't need to go as a submissive to anyone. Lots of our friends just go to watch but enjoy dressing up. I have other friends that live it 24 and 7.

I'll stay on the leash...GRRRR...you can just have fun...besides, I might need a nurse if Redpepper has built up any more strenght by the next event...I like it heavy and hard :eek:

Dress up and play I can do. 24/7 not so much (at least at this point). I tend to get a little ahead of myself in my mind and jump right to the end of something rather than just taking the steps along the way. Not everything has to be set in stone right now (or ever for that matter). It's a journey, much like the discovery of poly has been and my bisexuality before that, both of which I'm pretty comfortable with now but neither were things that I discovered quickly by any means and there was a lot of redefinition along the way.

-Derby
 
Limits?...my nipples are a no go zone pretty much...and sharp little smacks on my lilly white butt sting like crazy! Other then that you could pretty much beat the shit out of me with a wiffle bat :D

A whiffle bat? Aren't those the orange ones with the holes in them? I think I've seen people beat the shit out of each other with those, but those people tend to be under 4 feet tall! :D
 
When you haven't really participated in any way before it's a little hard to know where your limits are. I have so much to learn and I don't even feel like I have the tools to know what to ask.

well you just defined one up there ^^ :)...

Experiment, have fun with it and communicate clearly your fears and if you feel a limitation.

I will give you an example. I was more experienced and far more aggressive in bondage play than Pengrah had ever experienced. Our first experience together was to much for her, she had to create a hard limit for being completely bound. Limitations come with a caring partner and experimenting...:)

That brings up an interesting point in my own head. I wonder how many people were introduced to bdsm in a manner that turned them off, without patience. hmmmm...
 
Limits?...my nipples are a no go zone pretty much...and sharp little smacks on my lilly white butt sting like crazy! Other then that you could pretty much beat the shit out of me with a wiffle bat :D

Thats one of my no go zones. A good way to have me break the chains and wreck some havok is attack my nipples...As a top with bratty subs, I give due warning to not even try it.
 
Its taken me years to grow into what makes me tick. I prefer subs to be confident, attentive and intellegent. They need to be able to be independant, yet attentive to my whim. Always an eye on their mistress to see what she requires. Always doing what they are told.

You can have the brats Ari, I don't need any more children. Although at one point I understood that appeal. Now the punishment I give out is for physcological reasons, rather than bad behaviour, although I would give out some disapline for that too if need be.

I love that I protect Mono at events from other dominants and from women who are looking for a master. Really I do this in all aspects of his life, including buying him a ring to wear on his wedding ring finger so as to deter women from hitting on him. He takes much comfort in my protection and I take much pleasure in protecting him. At home he is free to be in his domain and free to decide, as long as it pleases me that is. Quite often I will tell him what I require and he is eager to please. He is not so eager when its about something other than sexual though... But then we don't live a 24/7 lifestyle. :D

Nerdist used to listen to me but doesn't listen to anything anymore. He is very independant and it is the cause of many of our fights. We fight a lot. His sunmissive nature is what drew me to him in the first place and that is gone now. Except when he needs me to be dominant. Then I am in my element and that is when we are at our best as far as I am concerned. He would disagree. He thinks that is his worst. What do I do with that? When I am at my best he is at his worst. Its a been a hard yien around for me to let him go and sometimes just do my own thing. What drives me crazy is that he will do things roly thinks are right because she has said them, after I have said the same thing for years.... I'm going off on a tanggent, sorry.

I am glad I have found a relationship with Mono in the way I have because I doubt nerdist and I would be together still if I didn't have and out let sometimes with him.

@my lovely derby- you and I have not brooched this topic at all. I find it facinating that you are interested and discovering for yourself if it means anything. You know you can always ask me anything, if I don't know the answer or it warrants research for yourself then I will help out. I like what we have talked about so far in terms of pictures you want to take and what you have discovered. That is a good place to start.

Your dream is interesting. I wonder if it is to do with the topic or about control in your life? There has been some craziness this spring for you. Lots of things going on beyond your control, maybe it relates to that in part, along with your new found facination with BDSM?
 
You can have the brats Ari, I don't need any more children. Although at one point I understood that appeal. Now the punishment I give out is for physcological reasons, rather than bad behaviour, although I would give out some disapline for that too if need be.

I can totally understand that. I have no kids. Maybe in the future, when I have kids, I won't want to deal with that side...:)...
 
So is a brat someone who does things that are "naughty" with the intent of getting punished?
 
I can see how that doesn't have much appeal to those with small children LOL

I would disagree a bit...that is one side of being a brat. The other side is the fight when trying to tie a good sub up. There is a pure element of domination submission that isn't just about being a disobedient.

There are also levels of friskiness...some just like to wiggle and be a nuisance, others like to scratch and fight there way into submission...and some just lay there and get tied up.

All in all, good times though :)
 
You'd be a scrapper I think derby! :D

Mono is a waiter. He waits while I tie him up good and tight so he can't get out and then I inflict pain and verbal abuse. I don't have the physical presence to physically take a sub down, but I do have a wicked tongue and don't put up with shit. My barking out demands seems to do the trick.

Haha, this conversation is making me very happy. :D what on earth will we talk about around the campfire in August Ari?! We'll be all silent probably, having talked it all out on here! :p
 
You'd be a scrapper I think derby! :D

Mono is a waiter. He waits while I tie him up good and tight so he can't get out and then I inflict pain and verbal abuse. I don't have the physical presence to physically take a sub down, but I do have a wicked tongue and don't put up with shit. My barking out demands seems to do the trick.

Haha, this conversation is making me very happy. :D what on earth will we talk about around the campfire in August Ari?! We'll be all silent probably, having talked it all out on here! :p

I could show you a thing or two about taking people down who are bigger than you are, you just have to take them out above the knee. :D
 
You'd be a scrapper I think derby! :D

Mono is a waiter. He waits while I tie him up good and tight so he can't get out and then I inflict pain and verbal abuse. I don't have the physical presence to physically take a sub down, but I do have a wicked tongue and don't put up with shit. My barking out demands seems to do the trick.

Haha, this conversation is making me very happy. :D what on earth will we talk about around the campfire in August Ari?! We'll be all silent probably, having talked it all out on here! :p

I am sure we can find someone to practi....I mean talk about :) There is more to me than just poly and bondage practices. :D...we will actually get to meet the "other" parts of ourselves :)

oh and for those who are really into rigging and roping it up, there is the houdini factor. I love subs that make it their goal to bust out of tie ups.

I have to say I miss it, Pengrah and I arent as into it with each other as we could be. I have had someone offer to sub for me...unfortunately it would be non sexual as I am not attracted to her. I tend to like to mix my games as it were :)
 
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