Your most recent OKC messages. post em here!

Wow, tenK, that's gotta be one of the most superbly abysmal ones yet.
 
lol meow!
 
Wow, tenK, that's gotta be one of the most superbly abysmal ones yet.

Yup. Definitely a contender for the polyamory.com annual prize for how not to get a date. :D
 
Woohoo!

Boy was I excited! I got a message on OKC!

I opened it up and it said:

"hi"

LOL

So I look at the profile. Pic of a young, pretty, blonde. Only 60% match. Answered 5 whole questions. Scammer.

Then I noticed another message:

"if you re looking for a friend and sexually submissive then you got me.lol but you would have to earn it"

Exact opposite of what I am. The bad thing is I know some guys probably fall for this.
 
Glad to see the girls can fail as epically as the guys. :)
 
Glad to see the girls can fail as epically as the guys. :)

*Whispers* Sometimes the girls *are* guys...trying to "catfish" an unsuspecting man.

I've had a couple "girls" chat me up, who, it was soon apparent, were men getting off on pretending to be hot lesbians.
 
"you are so hot "

me: Really??? Why?

"because i would love to give you a massage, no sex, just a great massage, and will do a special finger massage to if you like "

Be still my heart. Thank you but no. :rolleyes:
 
I got "You are gorgeous. You seem like a very complicated person. Very complex emotions I am guessing. How is that going for you?"
My response "Hi! Yes, I have been through quite a bit and love being true to myself. It's great and I am quite happy :)"
definitely one of the more interesting ones...
 
Ugh... See its shit like this, every terrible grotesque opener sent on OKC that the person would never say face to face when trying to get a date makes my job that much harder. I don't usually get messaged first cause, you know, I'm a dude.

However this is actually one of my favorite questions to ask dates off of OKC cause it never ceases to amaze. One of my favorites I got was from a lady who had the good sense to get a map of the world tattooed on her back and post it for the world to see. Someone messaged her
"Hey babe, if we hooked up I could cum all over the world," ~Some jackass on OKC
 
Today I received the following, from a very pretty Hispanic gay woman. She only has one photo, and a well-written but generic profile about how she's looking for love, and she only answered a few easy questions. If this isn't a man pretending to be a lesbian, I don't know what is.

"How are you doing today? Well i really enjoyed your profile and it took me so long before i could write this to you.i have to let you know it took me 15 minutes after i read your profile before i could write you this email that you look calm that makes me wonder if you can hurt an ant neverthless the feelings of human.pls does the calmness and coolness on your pretty face actually lives in you?if yes i think you might be that woman i have been seeking all my life to get to know.location will never be a barrier to me if you are willing to give me a chance, i believe asking your hand in friendship will make you the happiest woman on earth or even in some generations to come.Please i am looking for my last woman standing. Text me on (920) 903-xxxx Please send me a text or email .. 920903xxxx Sandy"
 
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Got this gem this morning. Someone who can write this much should have a bit better reading comprehension... and maybe better spelling, punctuation, and grammar skills.

Hello . How are you doing ,my name is (redacted) I am new to this online thing so please bear with me. I just wanted to drop you a line to let you know that I am interested in you,I just want a real relationship with a woman. that cares for me. . I'm looking for a serious and honest loving relationship really good friend and companion and woman I can spend my life with and share a woman that is that is compassionate loving caring a woman that likes to get out and have fun and go do things outdoors and in the social life I'm more of an outdoors kind of country Native American man just trying to find love I like to go camping hiking fishing canoeing swimming in the lake I like to go bowling watch movies play pool I enjoyed the starry nights looking at the stars by a campfire or in a backyard that's nice I'm a funny goofy kind of person at times but I enjoy life I am not hitting on you but dam. you are so, handsome, ! your like a woman's dream of perfection from heaven! as beautiful as heavens Angel's!
tell me more about yourself
if you are interested to connect in me you can drop me your email address or email me on my personal email (redacted; he also included his phone number)

I messaged back to tell him I was sorry he didn't read my profile, since it clearly states that I'm happily married and polyamorous and therefore am not the kind of woman he could "spend his life with."
 
Hello. How are you doing? My name is (redacted). I am new to this online thing, so please bear with me.

I just wanted to drop you a line to let you know that I am interested in you. I just want a real relationship with a woman that cares for me. I'm looking for a serious and honest loving relationship, a really good friend and companion, a woman I can spend my life with.

A woman that is that is compassionate, loving, caring. A woman that likes to get out and have fun, and go do things outdoors, and enjoy the social life.

I'm more of an outdoorsy, kind of country, Native American man. I like to go camping, hiking, fishing, canoeing, and swimming in the lake. I like to go bowling, watch movies, and play pool.

I enjoy starry nights... looking at the stars by a campfire or in a backyard, that's nice. I'm a funny goofy kind of person at times, and I enjoy life.

I am just trying to find love. I am not hitting on you, but damn! You are so handsome! You're like a man's dream, a woman of perfection from heaven, as beautiful as heaven's angels!

Please, tell me more about yourself.

If you are interested in connecting with me, you can send me your email address, or email me on my personal email (redacted; he also included his phone number)

Had to fix it! I like him better already. :p Although any man who sends his email and phone number in the first message is an immediate no. Reeks of desperation. Also shows he has no understanding of how careful women need to be in this "rape culture" world of ours.
 
Its kind of funny, but rikki and I have never thought of polywog shopping from this site. Collarme, perhaps, but that is like treading molasses.

We run a poly group in So. Cal, and at our last meeting, a couple of women suggested that they wanted us to schedule a picnic with cuddling. (O be still my.... heart.)

I am way too relationship conservative for this. Got to change.

Bear
 
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