Is thin the only sexy?

Neon, if you were a horse-person, you would be a centaur. :p
 
I am trying desperately to lose weight, and apart from having gastric banding done, I have tried pretty much everything. I am in a catch 22 situation - I need to excersise to lose some weight, but I cant excersise because of my health.

A lot of days I just want to give up.

My husband says he finds me attractive still - I personally dont feel it, but his perception of me is obviously much different to my own perception of myself.

I totaly get the trying but can't. I have to do low impact and be very cautious in how I work out. It's been a slow going fight. I have just this year kept a stable weight, so I am hoping 2011 will be my year to knock some of the weight off, but I know it'll take quite awhile, going the pace my body needs to keep from hurting.

Karma has told me there were times when I was thin that I was unattractive and times when I've been heavy that I've been very attractive. It's all in my personality and how I hold myself.

When I'm feeling confident and good about things, I can still turn heads. When I'm feeling down, in pain, or just not caring, I know people whisper behind my back.

My type has always been the big muscled jock. Football and hockey players. Body build wise, Karma is not my type, nor I his, but our connection throws all that out the window. As far as women, I need to see muscle tone. Big, small doesn't matter. But I need to see the athleticism. I think part of it is because it is something I prided myself on for so long, and no longer have.
 
Karma has told me there were times when I was thin that I was unattractive and times when I've been heavy that I've been very attractive. It's all in my personality and how I hold myself.

When I'm feeling confident and good about things, I can still turn heads. When I'm feeling down, in pain, or just not caring, I know people whisper behind my back.

Definitely this!

Taking care and pampering yourself, including getting a good hair cut regularly and making sure your clothes fit properly can do a lot for yourself esteem. For some reason, it's easier to exercise and eat healthy when you feel good about yourself.

About 4 years ago, I was skiing 2 days every weekend (kid was on the ski team) and walking 3-4 days a week. I was probably in the best shape I'd been in since high school, yet I was still just under 200lbs. I could keep up with my brother, who is extremely athletic and strong (and weights less than me). Fact was that I could out ski about 80% of the people at our local mountains. It was really fun to show off that this plus size girl could kick their but on a pair of skis:p.
 
What's sexy about someone has a lot less to do with their shape and more to do with their eyes and smile and a fearlessness about being themselves. I tend to be attracted to people who are a little bit different, who don't fall into the typical run of the mill "pretty" category (that includes ultra-thin). I tend to like curvy or athletic women and men who are cuddly.
 
What's sexy about someone has a lot less to do with their shape and more to do with their eyes and smile and a fearlessness about being themselves. I tend to be attracted to people who are a little bit different, who don't fall into the typical run of the mill "pretty" category (that includes ultra-thin). I tend to like curvy or athletic women and men who are cuddly.
You would hate me then. I'm super skinny.:p



No...Really. I'm 6'4" and only 170 lbs! :eek:
 
You would hate me then. I'm super skinny.:p



No...Really. I'm 6'4" and only 170 lbs! :eek:

Yep, too skinny for me! But then again if I was to judge when I am at my thinest I'M too skinny for me...5'5" and 125 (I'm currently slightly heavier than that).
 
I've hesitated jumping in on this thread as I come in right at the other end of the scale... I wouldn't even fit in the featherweight category :p

I am borderline healthy for my height.. 161cm and approx.. 46k at last weigh (I think)... I tend not to weigh myself as I get depressed that I *HAVE* to eat more... (which is not to say that I am anorexic or bulimic (as I am not - I have been to a doc and checked - I just have extremely efficient metabolism, and low blood pressure (which means I get to eat salty stuff like its going out fashion :D)

***********

I have to agree with the last posts - it's all in your own self-esteem... I do not find myself attractive... but, I am confident (to a large degree) in myself, I am happy and mostly outgoing... the world at large seems to find these qualities attractive, and therefore views me as being attractive and approachable. Go figure. :p

One of these days I plan to start weight training in an effort to build some muscle to help with the body mass thing... one day :D
 
A a larger fella, I don't tend to think one way or the other. I am not a fan of the extremes especially when they involve poor health. At 6'5 and 280...at this height the smallest I had been was 222 when I was in great shape. I am most confident at...250 to 260 (my "playing" weight). 222 was too small, I was judging myself based on my skinny face etc. Anyways thats besides the point.

past that, its all about the confidence. If you have it, people see it. If you don't...people will look right past you. Find what works for you and work towards it.
 
Ariakas, the guy I just started seeing is about the same size as you, 6'5" and about 275. He has a round belly and is totally bald. None of that matters. He's got confidence and swagger, and totally turns me on!
"swagger"....New word, old word. :rolleyes: The word's been around for centuries, yet had lost it's meaning and use for many years until about 2 or 3 years ago. WTF does it mean? What IS "swagger" now? :p I think that too many younger people use this word, to describe the way a man holds himself, rather than the way he walks. ;)
 
"swagger"....New word, old word. :rolleyes: The word's been around for centuries, yet had lost it's meaning and use for many years until about 2 or 3 years ago. WTF does it mean? What IS "swagger" now? :p I think that too many younger people use this word, to describe the way a man holds himself, rather than the way he walks. ;)
Well, I don't know how younger people use it, and don't really care, as the word never fell into disuse for me. I meant the way he struts, but I did use it as a noun, which means a swaggering manner. As a verb, it means the way someone walks. I am a writer (and former spelling bee champion! Woo-hoo) who helps tutor college kids in English, so I am aware of the words I use.
 
I guess it depends on how you define 'obese'. If it's clinically, well, that wouldn't prevent a woman from variety during sex. Even if the woman is bigger, that really doesn't have a lot to do with sexual ability. Personally, I've always been a very flexible woman and even now with 50lbs to lose, I am still very flexible. The skinny, fit, or average-sized chicks have always been amazed. I had an ex-girl who was 5'4" and about 100lbs who could not get fucked bent at the waist with her hands on the floor though I could. I can still do that, as well as, put my legs behind my neck, and so on. With that said, unless we are talking about obese as in 'reality TV shows', I am not of the mindset that weight is a big hindurance.

Funny thing is...I run into a lot of guys seeking to have sex with bigger women. A lot say the sex with smaller chicks is lacking and there have been various reasons why ranging from someone women not building their skill because they are smaller and assumably more attractive, thereby, feeling just the fact they have maintained that and are sharing the ass, a guy should be grateful to guys not being able to girls just being too thin and fragile for somethings. They say bigger women are more exploring and confident sexually plus many are more skilled because they've had to work harder in appealing to partners and maintaining relationships (this is just what I've been told).

With that said, I'm what they consider here in Colorado as a small BBW. I am 5'6", 214lbs and shaped like a pear. I wear a 14-16 top and a 18-20 bottom. I am working daily on losing weight just so that I can build my endurance for other things I am pursuing (dance, volleyball, rollerblading) not to catch up with this society's view of 'beauty'. I don't want to be a small chick. I've always been hippy with more ass than average and I want to continue to be that. I just want to get my ass in a size 16 bottom and I'm content. :D
 
Funny thing is...I run into a lot of guys seeking to have sex with bigger women. A lot say the sex with smaller chicks is lacking and there have been various reasons why ranging from someone women not building their skill because they are smaller and assumably more attractive, thereby, feeling just the fact they have maintained that and are sharing the ass, a guy should be grateful to guys not being able to girls just being too thin and fragile for somethings. They say bigger women are more exploring and confident sexually plus many are more skilled because they've had to work harder in appealing to partners and maintaining relationships (this is just what I've been told).

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Those are probably both myths. I think lots of men like voluptuous women just because they like good sized tits and a full ass! Current media ideas of female beauty be damned.
 
No, Magdlyn, they're not myths. They may not be prominent in various areas but Myths they are not. I've spent enough time in the 'sex' lifestyle having conversations and doing studies with men and women to know better than that. Additionally, size doesn't necessarily have anything to do with big ass and tits. I'm a C cup but I'm a bigger woman yet my last girl was a DD and a size 14. My ass has always been full and plump whether I was wearing a size 10 or a size 18. I know some really big women who have, as we like to say, 'noassatall'. Hips and ass are too different things. Additionally, we are making a big generalization. All men are not crazy about tits and/or ass in various degrees.

Personally, I enjoy sex more with bigger women myself because there. There is something more freeing about most of them (not all because my last wasn't all that in bed). I think it is because they have had to spend more time building themselves up and making sure they are on top of their game to get with they want compared to the amount of effort a more physically attractive, 'ideal' weight woman has to exert.
 
That may be true for young, green girls. I think older women, big or small, get better in bed just because it's fun for themselves to be adventurous, not to merely attract or please a partner.
 
That may be true for young, green girls. I think older women, big or small, get better in bed just because it's fun for themselves to be adventurous, not to merely attract or please a partner.

i don't know about you, but when I was "young and green" I was skinny AND adventurous.

So, i think these "studies" need to be taken with a grain of salt.
 
That would be another generalization. All older women don't get better in bed nor do they care do so. Some have sucked all of their lives. It has nothing to do with age or size. It's all about mindset. My last girl is an older woman and is mediocre. My mother and aunts are mediocre as well (How do I know this? Because I am open and candid with everyone which, for some reason, makes people feel more comfortable in sharing with me. Go figure). Also, getting 'better' in bed doesn't necessarily equate to being more 'adventurous' in bed. Still two different things. Case and point ... I can spend a great deal of time perfecting my head skills. That doesn't mean I'm more adventurous. Some people allow themselves to be more exploring and open sexually, thereby, broadening their ability to inquire and experiment. Some do feel like they have something to prove and that is their motivation to become better sexually. Ultimately, building your sexual skill set should, not only be about pleasing your partners, but also about learning yourself and what works for you.
 
@neon- lol. I'm with you. I was the same when I was young and green (well I was never really 'green' unfortunately). And, now, I'm bigger, nastier, and adventurous. :D
 
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