Blogging, blogging, blogging.

Even before he went back to school I was the main money source. Made about 10k more.

That, in addition to the fact I'm not cut out for traditional work force is why when he starts working I want to drop to no more than part time somewhere and focus on my arts.
 
Honey none of us are cut out for the traditional workforce.

There is nothing I would rather do than have a stable full of horses and spend my day playing with him. Guess what that wouldn't pay the bills.

Butch would love to play World of Warcraft and practice his swordsmanship. Guess what won't pay the bills.

Murf would love just to focus on the car thing. Travel the drag racing circuit guess what it isn't going to happen.

Hell my day job boss is a famous musician. Even he has to do sideline projects to make money because music alone is not safe enough. And he is in a band that HEADLINES European rock festivals. Heck they headline when they tour the us. Yet he has to endorse a line of ESP guitars, SIT strings, music software,a guitar cable. I could go on. Because Art alone doesn't pay the bills. Hell he busts his ass for his money. As his personal assistant I see his schedule.
 
I work part time. I work 3.5 days a week - have done for about 10 years.

I feel very strongly that part time wages should be a living wage for everybody - I think that few people are cut out for full time work. In my view, it's bad for our ability to maintain relationships and bad for communities. Plus - part time work is excellent for encouraging good communication and team working skills - which are in turn good for relationships and communities.

Anyway - as we don't live in the sort of utopia that I think we should, I think that the key to it is the type of part time work. Needs to be something that pays well and preferably doesn't involve other people working for you.

I work in IT. In the small team I'm in, only one is in the office 5 days a week and that person does short days. Some people work full time hours in 4 days and others are just part time. We're amazing at team working. :)

I own my own home, have a car, a very good social life and am able to look after C (my dog). Nobody else contributes financially to my household.

It is possible to do but I think it depends on the sort of field that you work in.

IP
 
Woodsmith is a bio major and most entry jobs are 3x what I'm currently making. That would make it easy for me to work a couple of days a week and focus on doing my photography, modeling, and performances to bring in "fun" money for myself.
 
Honey my degree is in Zoology with a minor in biochemic.

Want to know what a zookeeper makes $12/hr. I made more grooming dogs.

I was accepted into vet school. Didn't go because 200k of debt when you will only make 45k after school is not worth it. None of the veterinarian I work with are rolling in the dough. Wanna know what you make a vet tech with equal schooling as a human RN is $12/hr at the top end.

Biology job market is flooded. Ask me how I know. Plus since Woodsmith is such a motivated person you really think he is going to get a job easily in this market when he has been sitting on his duff all these years. Or are they going to pick the candidate who busted their ass on all ? Levels

I graduated in the top 5% of my college class. Did military service. Worked hard out of school too I come with references from some of the best in my profession. The director of the Brookfield zoo, the director of the Shed Aquarium, head of the Vet school of medicine at Penn. . I still have to fight to land a job.
 
These folks are correct

I work in IT and currently have working for me:

A psychology grad student who's doing this until he can get a job in his field(3years and counting working here)
An Doctorate in Art from a prestigious school who's glad to have a job
A film studies major.......

And on it goes.

I lucked into my job because...well because I'm me. I had no experience and threw a great interview, and miraculously landed here. What'd I used to do? Book editor. :)

Your BF needs to put your needs before his aspirations, which suspiciously read like someone avoiding responsibility. He can't work part time at McDonalds to supplement his total lack of income? C'mon!

I mean, it's nice that he wants you to be the breadwinner. But maybe being supportive of the current situation is just a tad bit more important? I'd probably dislike the people in your life from how you describe them.
 
Butch finally got a stable long term position last year. He works for the state. The hours suck he works 7 days and is off 2 then works 8 and is off 4 days. He works second shift. The wages are below what he would get in the private sector but a pension and awesome health insurance is worth it. But he has to deal with bureaucracy. He tested at the highest level for his position. He should have been promoted 9 months ago when a shift leader position opened up but he was passed over for someone with no experience in a coal fired plant who had more seniority on paper. Today we finally got the news he was promoted after that guy bombed and two other guys retired.

He is thankful for the job. He has worked jobs beneath him because that is what you do. Instead of sitting on your duff. You take care of your family.

Murf'a family owned a local garage for at least 3 generations. He has has 2 jobs in his 39 years. When his dads health failed they sold the family business. He currently works in an aluminum extrusion plant. He hates it. With a passion. But he had bills he has to pay so he does what he has to do. He'd prefer to work in a classic car/hot rod/speed shop but the market is in the freaking toilet.
 
CG,

I have thought that if you hung out with a different crowd, you might be happier.

Maybe that is true, maybe not. I know you care greatly for these folks but they don't seem to add anything to your life. Of course, we only hear about the bad times and not the joys.

Unfortunately I have to include Wordsmith in the group to get away from. I am unimpressed by someone who can't respect boundaries, is emotionally distant, and appears profoundly self-involved. And yes, I know, we don't see the good times here. But I cannot figure out what you do see in him. What do you get out of that relationship? I remain deeply puzzled by this.

But, to my fellow posters, can we move away from the gender essentialism? Wordsmith is under no obligation to support anyone because he has a penis. Yes, I also hope he would be more supportive, take a part time job or something so they can move out. But that's not the 'man' job anymore than cooking and cleaning is the 'woman' job. If that scenario works for Wordsmith and CG, that that is all good as long as it is freely chosen by both.

Partners should do what they can to support and care for their partners. Wordsmith has major failings in this regard, from what I read here. But he is not failing 'as a man' - he's failing as a person in a committed, loving relationship.
 
I love him and that makes me happy and he inspires me creatively. The marriage part wasn't in my mind for anything other than legal stuff because I see myself with him for life. Mind you I felt that way about Seven only without the idea of marriage stuff.

He actually does want to work a full time job. He knows he is more focused when he is working and that he actually enjoys it unlike me. Even before I mentioned to him I hate the idea of working he stated he wanted to new ankle to have something set up where I don't have to. I think that is probably a third reason we don't plan on having children.

I've never felt a relationship has to do anything for me outside of the other person putting forth the time/effort for us to be together. I don't need a relationship to be happy or fulfilled but I desire having one with people I realize I love past just a very close friend level.
 
Honey none of us are cut out for the traditional workforce.

Well said.

I am one of the lucky ones. Or rather, one of the 'lucky' ones. I do support myself with my art. But I often work 16 hour days, 6 days a week...or more...at my art, at promotions, at keeping life and the household running smoothly.
 
Yesterday was an interesting run of emotions.

First after work I spent 5 hours at a tattoo parlour. First waiting for the tattoo and then getting it. They were doing a day of the dead tattoo special and I got a pretty decent sized shoulder (outer) tattoo for only $40. And it's gorgeous.

Then went to a Halloween party done by a group called Generation Kink. Felt that it wasn't something I should feel bad about in regards to Seven (particularly since we weren't mentioning any of the kink related part of it) because I need to have my life but also because I didn't plan to do any kink other than maybe watching.

I did end up trying a few things (things that I had been interested in how they would feel). One was a dry ice branding, got a butterfly on each upper chest. The other was a bit of fire play. Flash cotton, moose, fire painting, and fire flogging. And even though I never expected to get into sub space I ended up doing so. Looking back I guess I shouldn't be too surprised that fire would be the one thing that puts me into subspace even without that deep connection to someone, spinning it in generally puts me into a low level floating head space. Had a lot of fun with that but then started crashing hard.

What really sucked is the crash came with two other parts. One was a feeling of loss because even before there was kink and I would just sometimes have a depressive state hit, Seven always knew how to get me back up. In regards to kink he was able to slow the descent of the crash that even though I still would have a secondary one (which I feel building from last night) I was able to vocalize at that point I needed even 10 min just to fall apart in his arms. My problem is I can't really vocalize much of anything when I'm crashing. Also since I wasn't planning on hitting space I didn't explain either to the people doing the fire play or Woodsmith what I need to help me lower. I'll admit Woodsmith tried, but when I'm crashing I need cuddles and to be enveloped. He was just doing really simple, soft strokes that when my nerves are on fire make me recoil (so after a couple he stopped).

The other part makes me realize I'm probably not really ready to play, particularly while living with Seven. I had a feeling that I was betraying him, cheating on him, throwing everything away. I know that I'm not because we aren't together and that we won't ever be getting back to that but it just happened. I'm not sure why or how to make it stop from happening again.

But oh my god, the fire was so amazing.
 
So my dad isn't willing to co-sign for a home because he doesn't want us to have an albatross around our neck when a time comes we would want to move.

However he is willing to help out for us to afford a place to rent for us to afford so we will still hopefully be able to get out of this place ASAP.

Also had the talk with Woodsmith. Hopefully things start changing in regards to the parenting feeling so we can get back to being sexual.
 
Today: Work with one of my friends on the co-op we are going to do in regards to our photography and other things.
Tomorrow: Go help someone feed 3.5/4 week old kittens.
Thursday: Look at Apartment 1
Friday: Photography work out in St. Charles
Saturday: BDSM lecture at coffeehouse.
Sunday: Poly discussion group
Monday: Look at Apartment 2.

Also have been working on two new bookings for my photography, have a shoot on Saturday for my modeling, Avon is going okay. Need to choreograph two fire routines for Dec. 13th.

Plus Seven actually started talking to me again (short but civil stuff) for the first time since the 24th so hopefully that means he's getting to a healthier place.
 
Hope things are going well, Cattiva.
 
Have a lot of updates. Will be posting them once at a computer.
 
Catching up.

Home situation: May have found a place yesterday. Putting in an application. Rent is affordable, they cover trash/sewer/water. Probably about the same size of where we live now but a different set up. Can have two kitties with just a $50 deposit.

Performer life: Got a fire performance on Dec. 7. Another Dec. 13. Burlesque performance Dec. 21. Then I'm doing a fire performance and assisting in a fire play demo on NYE.

Romantic life: A bit of backstory here. After Seven had broken up with me I had changed my profile on OKCupid explaining that I would eventually be looking but was only looking for friends. A guy (I'll call him SB for now, I'm sure I'll eventually figure out a nickname) started messaging me and we would pretty much talk daily on there regarding things. I met him in person at the munch I went to in October along with his wife (KB). He, his wife, his wife's boyfriend (NT), and the boyfriend's girlfriend (SP) came to the Thunder Kitten Halloween show. Saw them the next day at the kink party. SB did some fire play with me and helped me come down (actually since the munch he and I had started texting on a regular basis). Spent time with them last weekend both at a BDSM discussion and then a poly discussion. SB and I started talking about the fact we like each other, mesh well, and kink wise line up nicely. This weekend while Woodsmith was hunting I spent the weekend with him, KB, NT, and SP. SB and I did some talking and have decided to start a relationship. Woodsmith, KB, NT, and SP all approve and like this arrangement.

So yay for a lot of happy news recently.
 
One of the nice things is that SB not only encourages me to have open conversation with KB, KB is extremely approachable.

I think she may think SB and I are moving too slow.

He and I have realized we need to work on figuring out everything in regards to what we desire from everything and D/s negotiations. So once that starts up I'll let you know.
 
So Saturday I'm playing cards against humanity with some people from one of the kink groups. Woodsmith is going hunting. SB, KB, and NT are also going. KB also invited me to be part of a poly q&a the three of them are going to since SB and I are now dating.

It's really nice to get accepted by the wife of someone I'm dating (and that her boyfriend is just as welcoming).
 
Place I looked at with Woodsmith yesterday was a slum. So unless the place on Thursday is Oh My God Amazing (being $175 more than the place I saw over the weekend) I think we know which one we are hoping to get. Woodsmith is going to drop off the application Friday morning. Hopefully by the start of December we have a new place and can start moving out to it.

Today I get to play with the kitties that I'd be taking two of. Tomorrow I'm probably going to join SB, KB, NT, and SP to see Catching Fire (Woodsmith will join as well depending on how his studying goes). Friday I crash with my mom to do Christmas shopping the next day. Saturday after X-Mas shopping I join KB, NT, and SB for a poly talk and then going to a CAH/play party. Sunday is lazy day. Monday I'm doing a fetish (bondage/wax) shoot and Tuesday I'm taking pictures.

Then finally a few days off work.
 
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