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  #11  
Old 03-15-2019, 07:40 PM
sabrina8 sabrina8 is offline
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Congrats! People deserve to have good sex once in a while, damn it!

Still, you had yahtzee (phaha, your joke with the video is good) in the family house, I guess? Does his wife live there? Did you see her stuff, did you two talk about that?

I mean, you don't need to straight away but eventually this conversation needs to happen, in my opinion.
Also, keep close attention to how much personal stuff you share and how much personal stuff does he share, not just topics about the universe and the world. He could be fact collecting you, in order to know how you think and function.

No need to answer here, just keep close attention to these things.
Pardon my paranoia again! Keep us updated, if you want to, of course.

Hugs,
Sabrina
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  #12  
Old 03-15-2019, 09:46 PM
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River River is offline
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Originally Posted by sabrina8 View Post
He could be fact collecting you, in order to know how you think and function.
Fact collecting me? It sounds like you suspect him of nefarious reasons for asking me questions. But I "fact collected" him, too. In fact, we've been sharing thousands of bits of information about one another -- and that's simply what normal, healthy people do when they are getting to know one another -- because they like one another.

I suspect that you suspect this guy is some kind of narcissist or sociopath or something. And I suspect you suspect this 'cause you got taken in and hurt by a narcissist or a sociopath. I'm sorry you got hurt by someone who can't experience normal human empathy and compassion.

But my friend is anything but such a person. His kindness and warmth are palpable and real. That's why I opened up with him rather quickly, trusted him and grew fond of him.

Still, I will use appropriate caution and keep my intuitive capacities sharp. After all, we've only known one another briefly. But I like him. And he likes me. And that's a good thing!
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  #13  
Old 03-24-2019, 12:56 AM
Vicki82 Vicki82 is offline
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Shrugs- I'm a sex on the first date kinda girl, whether I'm dating a man or a woman. Assuming my partner is up for it, I don't think there is ever a too soon

Sounds like things are going well, River!
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My People:
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Mark/xH, ex husband of ten years.
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  #14  
Old 03-27-2019, 08:33 PM
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River River is offline
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Originally Posted by Vicki82 View Post
Sounds like things are going well, River!
Not so much, really. He's not been very communicative lately -- much less than before we got together, to say the least. He did say (when face-to-face) that he was enjoying our fresh new connection and that he definitely wanted more, and also said he'd like us to go hiking together soonish. But it's been a couple of weeks with sparse communication and no answer as to when we might go hiking together.

Typical, in other words.
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Last edited by River; 03-27-2019 at 08:37 PM.
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  #15  
Old 03-27-2019, 08:43 PM
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PS -

I've been around and around this loop, and yet I don't seem to be ready or willing to withdraw into a cave in the wilderness! Amazing! It's way past using reason or logic -- or analysis.... It's obviously irrational to continue making myself available. LOL!!!
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  #16  
Old 03-28-2019, 12:28 PM
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Magdlyn Magdlyn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by River View Post
PS -

I've been around and around this loop, and yet I don't seem to be ready or willing to withdraw into a cave in the wilderness! Amazing! It's way past using reason or logic -- or analysis.... It's obviously irrational to continue making myself available. LOL!!!
I'm in the same boat. Why is Pixi so good for me, yet I can't meet a decent man really worthy of me, to love me for more than a few months? I guess they're all taken? Maybe poly is different for young millennials than for Gen Xers and Boomers. There's just more supply of people looking for a mate.

You got lucky with your long term partner, and I got super lucky with Pixi, but in 10 years of poly, I've had some great experiences, but no real long runners. And I'm quite a catch if I do say so myself lol
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Pixi (poly, F, 41) my partner since January 2009, living together full time 6 years
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  #17  
Old 03-28-2019, 01:01 PM
Maur Maur is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by River View Post
Not so much, really. He's not been very communicative lately -- much less than before we got together, to say the least. He did say (when face-to-face) that he was enjoying our fresh new connection and that he definitely wanted more, and also said he'd like us to go hiking together soonish. But it's been a couple of weeks with sparse communication and no answer as to when we might go hiking together.

Typical, in other words.
Oh, that's sad
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  #18  
Old 03-28-2019, 01:12 PM
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vinsanity0 vinsanity0 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by River View Post
Not so much, really. He's not been very communicative lately -- much less than before we got together, to say the least. He did say (when face-to-face) that he was enjoying our fresh new connection and that he definitely wanted more, and also said he'd like us to go hiking together soonish. But it's been a couple of weeks with sparse communication and no answer as to when we might go hiking together.

Typical, in other words.
Kind of typical for newbies, right? And this guy is new to poly AND bi romance.
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  #19  
Old 03-28-2019, 01:45 PM
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Originally Posted by Magdlyn View Post
And I'm quite a catch if I do say so myself lol
Me too. LOL.

That is, I'm quite a catch for anyone who's wanting a genuinely affectionate, loving connection in which there is an ability and willingness to communicate sincerely, be "vulnerable," have real fun and good times together... and all the sort of things I'd want in a companion. I've got those qualities myself!

I'm really honoring this about myself at the moment, on account of (a), I had to earn it the hard way, those skills and capacities. I wasn't born with them, and I had to learn them the uphill climb way, going against the same load of crap conditioning / socialization which most men have unfortunately inherited and (b) I don't want my long string of disappointments to shut me down, so I'm also resilient! Very. So I too am feeling pretty good about myself.
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  #20  
Old 03-28-2019, 02:00 PM
Maur Maur is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by River View Post
Me too. LOL.

That is, I'm quite a catch for anyone who's wanting a genuinely affectionate, loving connection in which there is an ability and willingness to communicate sincerely, be "vulnerable," have real fun and good times together... and all the sort of things I'd want in a companion. I've got those qualities myself!
Well, text is text not speech but going by your collaborative inquiry thread, i'm inclined to agree
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