I’m having a hell of a time with a non-escalator relationship.
A period of bad mental health on my partner’s side is exacerbating the non-escalator aspects. Like, I have no guarantee I will see or talk to them if I don’t reach out first, which I assume is mainly depression. (And after months of onesidedness,’I sometimes need to just let things go rather than do all the planning.) But neither of us can imagine a life without the other being happy. My partner has a hard time being around my kids. So time is limited to my free time. But when It comes to emotional support- she is my rock. Who I’ve seen maybe 2-4 hours a week for the past month. Huge dip from 2-3 nights a week, with overnighting even when kids were around.
I’m trying to “lay low” and not expect partner-like behavior. Which is much more comfortable than expecting it. And at the same time- it hurts not to have it, especially when others have this of her because of work or nesting situations. (Though that gives me hope she will get it back with me when she picks up- which tends to hold true.)
It sounds like shw’s just Not that into me- except that doesn’r seem to hold true. Not when we are together, and often not when we are apart.
She’s just struggling with life. And the struggle has booted us off the path we used to be on.
And I’m not sure where it leaves me.
A period of bad mental health on my partner’s side is exacerbating the non-escalator aspects. Like, I have no guarantee I will see or talk to them if I don’t reach out first, which I assume is mainly depression. (And after months of onesidedness,’I sometimes need to just let things go rather than do all the planning.) But neither of us can imagine a life without the other being happy. My partner has a hard time being around my kids. So time is limited to my free time. But when It comes to emotional support- she is my rock. Who I’ve seen maybe 2-4 hours a week for the past month. Huge dip from 2-3 nights a week, with overnighting even when kids were around.
I’m trying to “lay low” and not expect partner-like behavior. Which is much more comfortable than expecting it. And at the same time- it hurts not to have it, especially when others have this of her because of work or nesting situations. (Though that gives me hope she will get it back with me when she picks up- which tends to hold true.)
It sounds like shw’s just Not that into me- except that doesn’r seem to hold true. Not when we are together, and often not when we are apart.
She’s just struggling with life. And the struggle has booted us off the path we used to be on.
And I’m not sure where it leaves me.