Thanks Mags.
I am frustrated and hurt.
But-I also recognize-that I have been frustrating and hurtful in my life to people who have found that after some time I was able to get my own head out of my ass and was worth re-engaging with as a friend.
So-I'm willing to hope that given time and some space, he can learn to manage his life better and I can get OUT of the role of being the "go-to man" for him.
We'll see.
Sweet Pea got home safely Tuesday night. It was SO good to see him when he walked out of the security gate at the airport! I really missed him!
He came out looking all serious, as soon as we made eye contact, he got a grin and said "hey sexy mommy!" (I have always called him my sexy baby). He gave me a big hug and a kiss and then looked for his dad, got a hug from his dad too. All good.
Last night we were all hanging out in the living room. Sweet Pea and I were curled up on the loveseat together, catching up on his trip and what has gone on here while he's been gone. We started cracking jokes, it derailed (happily) to the point we were both laughing so hard we had tears rolling down our faces, our shirts were wet from our tears. We both were complaining our stomachs hurt because we laughed for so long.
The rest of the family was watching (and talking) and shaking their heads at us. We couldn't stop laughing.
One of us would say a word and then we'd erupt into fits of giggles all over again.
Suffice it to say; we both missed each other. Sweet Pea told his grampa this morning "it's just that mom and me, we understand each other & we have the same sense of humor. But no one else gets it."
I agreed; I added, "yeah, when we're apart, we just have all this stuff in our head and no one we can share it with, cause no one else gets it."
I think we both are feeling better today. Not that we were feeling BAD, just that there is something spectacularly wonderful about being able to let everything serious go and just have a freaking hilariously fun time with someone else who totally gets it.
He's such an awesome kid. I really hope when he finds life partner(s); they are just as awesome lol! Cause I really enjoy hanging out with him!
We (he and I) are planning a vacation together. We want to go on a "mom and son" trip as a graduation gift to each other (I graduate with my bachelors and him from hs about the same time). We haven't yet established a where to yet-but we're planning.
Tomorrow EARLY morning he and Maca leave with grampa and uncle and nephew to go to hunting camp til the 20th. That will be cool for them. Tomorrow evening I fly out to Oklahoma til the 26th.
Today I traded the van in for a small prius.
Another check mark on my to-do list. Lower payments and MUCH better gas mileage.