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Old 01-31-2011, 06:22 PM
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redpepper redpepper is offline
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Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 7,732
Default forgiving.

"Oh man. I HATE it when I'm the one who screws up. It's so much easier for me to forgive someone else than to forgive myself. I really beat myself up, too, especially if I should've known better. I mean, I really work myself over. I think it grows out of from holding myself to a high standard. One of the things I'm working on is to extend the same level of compassion and forgiveness to myself that I so freely give to others. I have to remind myself that "nobody's perfect" applies to me too."

I got this in a message from a dear friend to me. It's such a good reminder. Relationships are hard work, and there is no relationship that is harder work than the one that I have with myself.

I forget to be the best primary to myself first. That means forgiving myself for being human. I am but a raw bit of flesh that is full of stuff that I don't understand. The stuffing in me is a mystery. It is constantly unraveling and revealing its true nature. I hate it and love it at the same time... constantly finding a balance.

How do you go about being the best primary?
What are your goals for yourself?
What do you do to forgive yourself and allow yourself to just be who you are, flawed and raw and human?
How do you balance who you are with what is expected and what you have promised?
How do you go about forgiving others for the very same humanness?
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balance, boundaries, cheating, forgiveness, primary

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