Your most recent OKC messages. post em here!

I rarely get the nasty comments so many women do but got a doozy today! From OKC.

Entitled:
'Hi, how are you?'
[His profile is completely empty and he has answered no questions. 0% match. I don't respond.]

Entitled:
'REALLY???? LOL'
[a few minutes after I look at his profile]

Entitled:
'just as well....my bed has a two ton weight limit....you would break it lard ass :)'

Normally I would just block the asshole but I decided to try and make a teachable moment. And, no, I do not expect this to work.

Me:
'Being cruel to others won't make you feel better about yourself. Might feel good in the moment but ultimately just highlights your lack of self-worth.

I didn't respond because you have nothing in your profile. Nothing to tell me anything about you. You've answered no questions. Your message was generic. I don't respond to people who have blank profiles.

I don't owe you a response. No one does. If you can't handle that basic fact of life - that everyone gets rejected and that no one owes you anything - do not date online. Don't date at all until you get that sorted out.

Go learn if you dare. Here's a place to start: http://www.doctornerdlove.com/2012/06/privilege-entitlement-dating/all/1/. Sadly, I suspect you won't read it but I hope otherwise.'
I find the whole thing just so sad and just puzzling. Why try to hurt a stranger this way? (I am fat but I also like myself so the insult did not hurt me as he wanted.)
 
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He's entitled alright. [facepalm]
 
Ugh, opal, that is a doozy. Why do they contact you knowing you're plus size, only to mock you for it afterwards? Because some men never develop emotionally past middle school mentality.
 
Why do they contact you knowing you're plus size, only to mock you for it afterwards? Because some men never develop emotionally past middle school mentality.
Yeah, it's so typical. You're never "too fat" until you reject them. Has happened to me many times (in real life and online). I remember walking in Central Park once, and a guy said to me, "Hey baby, can I have your number?" I tossed off a quick, "No," as I walked on. He got all pissy and called out, "Yeah well, you got a fat ass anyway!" I turned around and yelled back, "Funny, it wasn't fat before I turned you down, schmuck!"

The world is full of idiots.
 
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After months without messages, today I received one that is a first name (all lowercase) and a phone number. I can only be baffled that the guy thinks there is a chance I'll call him.
 
After not going to OKC for about a month, I finally check in. I had one sweet message from a 99% match, which was nice.

I also had 3 msgs from another guy...

--hello magdlyn i want to talk to you.

--Cunt

--Hey maglyn, anything else you want to know about me?

Blocked him!
 
Because "Cunt" is so intriguing in a bad-boy way, that of course you would want to follow up and see what THAT'S all about...

At least the answer to that last question was no, nothing more you need to know. ;)
 
Quite frankly, these messages scare the crap out of me. These are all men who absolutely could commit violence against women.

The #YesAllWomen stuff really hit home for me...these nasty messages are no longer funny to me.
 
Ax murderers are so entertaining from afar ...
 
Quite frankly, these messages scare the crap out of me. These are all men who absolutely could commit violence against women.

The #YesAllWomen stuff really hit home for me...these nasty messages are no longer funny to me.

What is #YesAllWomen? Is that a pick-up artist phrase?
 
What is #YesAllWomen? Is that a pick-up artist phrase?

It's a hashtag used on twitter with anecdotes about what women commonly have to face due to sexism. It was created, as far as I understand, in response to comments that things like that were rare and most women didn't experience them.
 
There's a #Notallmen hashtag/article identifier that gets used in posts or articles where men are upset to be painted with the "potential assailant" brush. Not all men use roofies, not all men are jerks - and it's true, they're not.

But the #Yesallwomen tag basically turns that around and says, look, I know that not all men are raging a-holes, but ALL women have to consider these things - consider that, on a first date, they really ought to meet in a public place; that they may not want this person to know where they live; that they NEED to think about not putting themselves in a situation where they might get taken advantage of because we don't know what kind of man you ARE.

I have to seriously consider going for a run at 9pm because it's getting dark. That thought wouldn't even cross my partner's mind. It's that sort of thing that #Yesallwomen is trying to convey, despite the realization that #Notallmen are like that.

Jeez, I really need to drink my coffee and get to work. :)
 
There's a #Notallmen hashtag/article identifier that gets used in posts or articles where men are upset to be painted with the "potential assailant" brush. Not all men use roofies, not all men are jerks - and it's true, they're not.

But the #Yesallwomen tag basically turns that around and says, look, I know that not all men are raging a-holes, but ALL women have to consider these things - consider that, on a first date, they really ought to meet in a public place; that they may not want this person to know where they live; that they NEED to think about not putting themselves in a situation where they might get taken advantage of because we don't know what kind of man you ARE.

I have to seriously consider going for a run at 9pm because it's getting dark. That thought wouldn't even cross my partner's mind. It's that sort of thing that #Yesallwomen is trying to convey, despite the realization that #Notallmen are like that.

Jeez, I really need to drink my coffee and get to work. :)

I liked this article written by a guy who shows other men how not to be a part of rape culture.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/zaron-burnett/guide-to-rape-culture_b_5440553.html
 
But what the hell can you do with a hashtag on Twitter?

It's a means of aggregating posts so that you can read related ones together. Searching for #Notallmen on Twitter would bring you a thread of posts with that tag in it.

Of course, it's overused past the point of usefulness into self-parody now: http://theoatmeal.com/comics/selfies
 
#lovehashtags #musthavemore ;)
 
But what the hell can you do with a hashtag on Twitter?

I don't really understand Twitter myself, or even what a hashtag is...but in this case, #YesAllWomen (you can do a google search for it) is a long list of Twitter posts where women talk about their experiences with misogyny, rape culture, and violence against women.

It started after the shooting rampage in California the other month, when that guy who hated women decided to kill a bunch of people because he was angry that women wouldn't sleep with him. He left a manifesto explaining his reasons (with language similar to what I see on OKC all the time).
 
Off the #yesallwomen topic because I have to laugh about it somewhere! today's winner was a deliberately-vague-about-relationship status gentleman that pinged "cheating". Called him on it and got "oh, I'm unilaterally non-mono". Can we say bullshit?
 
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