If you feel you are not being fairly treated with respect to taxes, insurance, etc. you are completely justified to insist that your partners work with you to redress that unfairness. There is always a way to find a fair balance; sometimes "equal" is an unreasonable expectation, but fair is always possible.
To me equal means I am just as good as my spouse... of course there are things he can do better than me.. and vice versa... to me if your equal with someone.. that does mean fair treatment. I have seen lots of people treat their spouses like they were beneath them... instead of equal to them. I suppose thats what i mean. I hope that makes sense.