East Coast Howdy!

opalescent

Active member
Hello!

I've been lurking for a bit. Like many folks, I've been reading the board trying to figure out as much as I could about polyamory. I am Opalescent (yes, I enjoy shiny things!). I'm female, 39, and in the Mid-Atlantic of the U.S. I'm a lesbian who is exploring sex with men.

I am married to my Beloved wife of 11 years. We had talked about non-monogamy for a while. However, she moved to the West Coast for a dream job that could not be passed up. I am on the 'right coast' and anticipate staying here for some time as there are not many openings in my field near her. So we are doing the long distance thing for the near future.

Although it is hard to be away from Beloved so much, it has had the side effect of making it somewhat easier for me to explore polyamory. Beloved has a male lover, Pool Boy, who she has been with for decades. She's pretty happy with just me and Pool Boy and currently doesn't feel the need to seek other relationships. I've been exploring the polyamory communities near me and am really enjoying myself. So far the communities I've interacted with are made up of mostly straight men and women with the occasional bi woman popping up. I've had less luck connecting with the lesbian, gay men or queer poly communities. Still, it's early days yet.

I'm flirting with a few people, including men which is new and exciting for me. Things are developing but nothing that I would label a relationship yet.
 
wow, this sounds refreshingly non-dysfunctional!

"Pool Boy" I love that - I bet she calls him that in real-life too right?
 
Pool Boy

Neonkas,

She doesn't actually call him that - it's a joke between us - that if he ever decided to just chuck everything, he could always come and be our pool boy.
 
Another lurker from the East

Im a lurker from the East Coast as well ( Philadelphia, PA burbs)

Nice to make your aquaintance Opalescent!

I also am doing long distance with my gf who lives in Boston but its a little closer than what you are dealing with. Nonetheless my heart still goes out to you.

I identify as poly and gf is poly curious at this point so we are going to see how things progress from here.

I have a few female friends who I have told I was poly in hopes of possibly seeing if there was more than just a close friendship but they dont quite get it and just thinking im looking to cheat which I explain is not the case but they don't feel right so no go sadly. Its not easy.

Good luck on your search!

Matt
 
Welcome! :cool:

I've been exploring the polyamory communities near me and am really enjoying myself. So far the communities I've interacted with are made up of mostly straight men and women with the occasional bi woman popping up. I've had less luck connecting with the lesbian, gay men or queer poly communities.

From my observations, that's pretty typical of many poly communities...mostly straights, a few bi's (especially women but occasionally a guy) and few gay men or lesbians. (But however...they are usually some of the most gay-friendly straights you'll ever meet. :) )
The reason I think is that even if the gay men or lesbians are living a poly lifestyle, they often don't actually think of the world "poly".
Big metro areas like NY or SF are probably the exception...they are more likely to have LGBT-oriented Poly groups.

Good luck in your search and your journey.
 
Reply

Mattw1970,

Thanks for chiming in as another person in a LDR. I'm always interested in how others handle living in a long distance relationship. Beloved and I also did a long distance stint where I was in DC and she was in NYC for about a year. Ah, the joys of driving I-95. Good luck to you too!

RfromRMC,

Do you or anyone else know of poly groups for lesbians, gay men or queers in general in and around the Washington-Baltimore metro areas? I've come up with squat so far.
 
RfromRMC,

Do you or anyone else know of poly groups for lesbians, gay men or queers in general in and around the Washington-Baltimore metro areas? I've come up with squat so far.

Nothing gay-specific. Like my area, you can visit the local poly group, which seems to be friendly but that's it.
 
Welcome, O. This does sound like a very exciting time for you, especially, regarding your newfound explorations. I must be in a good area because I run into plenty bi men and women who are poly or poly-curious which is like heaven to me because I love sex positive people! It really Really broadens our horizons for sexual exploration. Anywho...I look forward to watching your journey.
 
hi opalescent, did i spell it right? enjoy your exploration time...i hope the men that you connect with are respectful of your lifestyle..i'm sure that you will accept nothing less, you sound very grounded.

i'm 41, poly for past several months. grew up in yonkers, ny.

take care!
 
enjoy your exploration time...i hope the men that you connect with are respectful of your lifestyle..i'm sure that you will accept nothing less, you sound very grounded.

Thanks! So far so good - at least with the one man I've connected with. Things are going well - he's quite secure and considerate which is a great combination.
 
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