our poly life

sterling119

New member
For those who have followed our budding relationship in the introductions area this is a continuation as asked for by several here. If you have not followed and care to please feel free to do so and as always any comments and or advice is welcome.

Well another pretty good weekend is coming to a close....so far so good with everything. Wifes "second husband" came back home as planned on friday. I was working overnight that day due to a schedule change so they had the night together alone. Had dinner, cuddled on the couch with some nice flirt/play time and then up to bed where according to wife they had fantastic sex that night and slept together in our bed till morning. I got back mid morning just as he was going to spend time with his family, both had a nice smile and looked satisfied and happy :). Wife and I had been invited to a party/ bbq event that afternoon and ended up staying the night there due to our policy of no drinking and driving. We had a nice private room and we truly enjoyed both the party seeing old friends we hadn't seen in a bit and the night together alone. Very good sex and cuddled up for the night after waking still cuddled up in the morning. Got back today and we are currently just chatting, enjoying the evening together with her cuddled up between us and flirting with both. Since he will be leaving for the week late tonight he is going to get a short nap and she will be joining him as it is the last time we will see him till next friday. I am sure she will come cuddle up to me after he leaves for work and we will have our week together again looking forward to next weekend.
 
All sounds very good and similar to our situation. My wifes boyfriend visit are usually 2 weeks at a time where they get lots of one on one time together in addition to all of us hanging out and having a good time. He and I get along great as well and comfortable with each other even when my wife is not around. Would love to hear more!
 
heading into another weekend.

Well it's friday again, wife's "second husband" should be home at some point this evening for the weekend. We are both excited about him coming home and she says he is as well as they have been texting all week. Last weekend he was only able to spend time with him friday night while I was at work. Saturday we went to a party we had been planning on for a long time and sunday evening they normally spend time together however she was not feeling well and time with him kinda got pushed to the side. This week we decided he should get more time with her so tonight we will all be home but she will be spending the night with him to kinda "make up" what happened last weekend. Not sure what we are doing saturday evening but I am sure the 3 of us will go to dinner out and maybe some shopping or perhaps a stop at a club for some fun time...we will play it by ear and sleeping arrangements by ear as well but we know for sure about tonight. I will let everyone know how the weekend went at some point so stay tuned if your interested. We so far have no issues and both get along well with "our girl".
 
another weekend

been a bit since I have added anything here. Lots has gone on over the last couple of weeks including our first ripple in the v. It has been 2 weeks since D and J have been together sexually for several reasons. D and I were away for 1 overnight out of town trip so that weekend didn't work out for them, the next one was a combo of things, he didn't get in from his job till very late that friday, saturday he had a bout of bad behavior so to speak going to his ex inlaws for a lake party and being to drunk to drive home (although give him and them kudos for not actually driving in that condition). Sunday brought a little rift....little but an evening ruiner that was resolved right away and that makes 2 weeks in a row since he is only home weekends.

This weekend should be a good one with her being in a good mood, forgiving the rift between them and him already being home for the weekend. D and I have talked and I am going to let them have the run of the house tonight for some alone time since I have had her all to myself for the last couple of weeks. She is out at her weekly girls evening then home to him and I will be out for the night so they can enjoy eachothers company. Will post again when I hear how things went and more about our weekend.....that is if there is anyone interested....if not maybe it's time I keep it to myself.....lol.
 
Will post again when I hear how things went and more about our weekend.....that is if there is anyone interested....if not maybe it's time I keep it to myself.....lol.

Please do! The blogs don't generally generate many comments as they are seen as the "poster's home" on the site. But we are reading/learning/sympathizing.

As the "hinge" in a MFM cohabitating Vee (ours is full-time) I love reading about how others manage/arrange things.

JaneQ
 
Time split weekend

Well, the weekend came and went. Friday while I was out for the night so they could have alone time since they had not been together for almost 2 weeks. I was told j was there when she came home around 10 or a little after. She did some things around the house and they sat down to a nice pot of coffee, talking and enjoying each others company for about an hour. I had not seen him that day and she hadn't either so he did not know the plan for the weekend. She asked him if he would like to spend the night with her in our bed as we had talked and thought they needed some time to relax and enjoy eachother totally with no one around. He was very happy about the plan and they retired to our upstairs bedroom for the night. She said they kissed, had some nice foreplay and went on to make love for quite a while enjoying several positions and both having those good tension releasing orgasms......lol. They cuddled up and slept the night away peacefully with her waking in the morning for work and him giving her a nice kiss and telling her how much he enjoyed the night. I got back to our house mid morning having a bite to eat and some coffee. J came downstairs and could not be more happy. We have now decided all together that split time on the weekends for whole nights might be a better plan although we will see how it goes but it sure worked this last weekend as all were very happy and content. A question for all in a v relationship from us is how do you split time? both home and bedroom time and what works best for you?
 
I'm glad things went well from everyone's perpective:) - Happy, Happy, Joy!

A question for all in a v relationship from us is how do you split time? both home and bedroom time and what works best for you?


This is going to greatly depend on the individual people involved and the levels of alone/couple/together time that each person wants/needs. I think the "love languages" come into play here as well. We all live together full-time and I am the only one who works outside the hose. They get their "friend" time while I am at work and we spend non-sexy evening times all together - doing things together or separately or with one but not both.

My relationship with MrS is much more built on sharing of values and ideas - we emotionally bond over intellectual conversation (sharing the "love language" of quality time). Dude is much more physical/emotive (love languages - "physical touch" and "words of affirmation") - so he gets most of the bedroom sexy times.

If one of us feels the need for alone time...or couple time...we just do that! There is not a planned schedule. (It probably helps that we are all pretty independent people with plenty of shared, and NOT shared, interests.)

JaneQ
 
more of our lives

Well it has been a while since last post. Things are still going pretty good here. J came home last weekend although he didn't get in till very early morning. D and J had planned on spending the night together friday's but last weekend just didn't work out for that really due to his work. I finally went to our bed and slept there as he didn't get home. She got up for her work on saturday morning to find him home and went to wake him for a coffee.....and you guessed it they ended up in bed naked.....lol. Both had a good time although cut a little short due to her having to go. I got up and was informed by j that he got in and she woke him for "coffee", that ended up being more but that it was good....not as good as a whole night but good.. We went through our day here, working outside around the house mowing and what not. J went to his daughters for a visit and got his son for the weekend, brought him back in the late evening saturday after spending the day with him. After his son went to our spare room to bed D and J and I were on the couch for a bit cuddleing and talking. Went to bed to our room and she went to spend some time with him cuddleing and making love. She and he both loved it and is sure sounded like they had a good time for a bit....lol. Sunday we had his daughter and kids out, our son was home, his son was here and we had a cookout and bon fire. He also had a friend here he knows for a while. Finally everyone went to bed with j and d going to his room for a while then d came back to our room. Was a nice way to spend the day and evening. Sunday brought breakfast, more outside work, cuddleing later in the evening and just enjoying eachothers company. I had to work monday d and I went to bed early for us and had some nice quality time together. She seems so happy with both of us here, very nice to see and they are now turly in a "love" relationship telling each other finally so I think we are good. They spent the day monday around the house, he took d and his son to breakfast then he was with his family for the rest of the day and left for work in the evening. They didn't get a chance to make love before he left but they are planning on spending friday night all night together as I am working late and will sleep somewhere so they can use our room that night. D and I are going on a mini vacation overnight saturday so I told her no rush, enjoy each other all night and if they feel like it again saturday morning as there is no rush for us to go and I have her the rest of the weekend so it's all good. Sometimes she worries about the time split but I like to give them as much time as I can cause he is only here weekends. I am pretty happy with the way things have played out so far, seeing her so happy and fulfilled is very nice and she is happy and in love so it's all good. He tells her he loves her as well when talking on the phone, texting and making love. Sometimes while cuddleing as well so I think we are good......more later on as things develop as long as people want to hear about it. Any suggestions or comments are welcome as well.
 
Well, May is here and we are getting deeper into our poly relationship. J seems to have some judgement problems about other woman that somtimes bothers D because he will be on his damn i phone looking but says there is nothing to worry about as the one he chats with is just a friend and nothing is happening or going to happen. J has brought up the whole boy toy thing to her and she assures him he is much more than a boy toy to her. They now regularly tell each other they love each other and according to her the sex is fantastic!! We have decided that friday nights will be "their time" together every week as long as he gets in on time from his work so they now spend friday nights together all night normally in our bed. This week he got in around 730, showered and changed with them ending up on the couch talking about what to do. He wanted to take her on a dinner date but when she asked what he wanted he laughed and said....sex of course, she said before or after dinner and he laughed and said yes......classic line that she loved hearing so they went upstairs and spent some quality time together although not long enough for her....but then again he had been gone all week, this was before going on their date. They then went to a nice steak house here near us. Had a nice dinner curled up together in a booth and enjoyed eachothers company over dinner, doing some quick shopping before coming home. By the time they got back it was getting late so they retired back to our room and had what she says was fantastic sex for an hour before drifting off to sleep cuddled up naked together. She told me the session was the best yet with the positions and intenseity. They slept in a bit in the morning still curled up in eachothers arms getting up to make coffee and get some breakfast. I had purposely worked late the night shift so they could have that intimate time together they seem to lack sometimes and went to the gym in the morning so as to be sure not to disturb them. By the time I got home he had gone to get his son for the day out. She had a huge smile on her face and thanked me over and over for giving them that time. D and I had planned on being gone over night saturday to a casino/concert and had a great time together with great lovemaking after and again in the morning. She seems so happy to have 2 men that love her although she does say she knows I love her more and she feels the same towards me. She does say that she hopes this all works out for a future together and they are going to talk about a more permanent relationship in the near future. I was not feeling well sunday night and had to also get up early for work so I went to bed early, J was also in bed as he leaves late or early for his week away at work. She joined me and curled up thanking me for the weekend we had as we drifted off to sleep together. She woke me a couple of hours later and asked how I was feeling, also asking if it was ok to go give J a nice send off for the week. I told her it was up to her since he is her "second husband". She smiled and got up going to his room for a while. She was back in our bed when I got up to go to work in the morning looking very satisfied and happy. She sent me an e mail when she got up again thanking me for our new life and said they had a nice time and that she would see me when I got home. Over all I would say it was a sucessful weekend....everyone seems happy and satisfied and J seems to be going with our routine quite well. More coming as things develop......:)
 
thanks

i enjoy reading your blog. One ask can you split things up a bit so they are easier to read.
 
been a bit since last post

Well it's been a bit since the last post. Update on things, D was gone for work over the weekend last weekend so not much to update on that although J did make it home before she left. She has a whole weekend job a few times a year where she cooks for large groups. No private time for any of us and we went through the weekend without her with me doing some around the house work and J bringing his son to our home for father's day weekend then going to his older daughters on sunday for the day. D came back home early sunday afternoon and relaxed a little and then helped me outside a bit. I know J missed her almost as much as I did. J dropped his son back home after being at his daughters for the day having some fun on the lake. He got back in the early evening and seemed very glad to see D before he had to leave for the week giving her a nice hug and kiss on his arrival. J wanted to get some sleep as he leaves around 1 am for his week away with the travel time and went into the house. D and I talked and she really wanted to spend some quality time asking me if it was ok and of course I said yes to go to him as I have her all week. She had that great smile on her face as she went into the house. Later on when I got done outside I went in to find her with a huge smile on her face and she said they had a nice time, great sex, great cuddle time with both professing their love and contentment with the relationship so far. D asked if it was ok if she went back to his bed for some more cuddle and sleep time before he had to leave for the week and off she went. Very quiet in the room as all they did at that point was cuddle up together but she said it was nice to have him for a while. She woke me briefly when he left for his week and thanked me for the time even though nothing more then cuddling up together.
 
weekend time

D and I have now decided for sure that if possible friday night will be her and J's time every week. It works out better most of the time as it is easy for me to work late and then spend the night at our other home so as not to disturb them and both are very thankful to me for that. They are both now professing love and desire to make things more perm. at this point. D is very happy to have a second "husband" who also loves her and couldn't be more thankful to me for allowing this. I am happy to see her this happy and J is not only happy but now wanting to settle in a little more. This week it may not work out for friday with his work schedule but we have decided if it doesn't work out for friday saturday will automatically be "their" day/night to date and spend the night together with D and I getting this friday together and sunday being up in the air as to what/who spends time or both if we are just around the house. I think at this point we are into a routine that works for all of us. Anyone else out there in the same type of relationship please feel free to let us know how you handle this whole time thing as we are always open to suggestions.
 
Getting better

Not sure anyone is following our blog but I enjoy writing anyway.....Well we made it through another weekend and it was a really good one at that. Friday has become "their night" where they like to spend the whole night together. This last friday J got in from his work week later then he had been but still was there by like 1130 ish I think. D was already in bed but knowing J was coming she had taken the time to be freshly showered and was actually quite ready for him. J came in, showered and met her in our bed. According to D they had a fantastic night, gentle passionate love making, cuddle up after and fall to sleep in eachothers arms. Saturday morning D had to work for a few hours so she was gone when I got up, J was up and had a smile, said they had a great night and was very happy. J went to get his son for the day, came back in the late afternoon and then went to his daughters out by the lake for the evening. Saturday D and I went to dinner, shopping for a bit and came back to watch a game on tv cuddled up together. We had a fantastic night together.....best sex we have had in a long time and went on for a long time. Cuddled up together for the night and got a good nights sleep after both very happy. Sunday this week brought work around the house, gardening, trimming....that kind of stuff. J was home, grilled outside for us and we had dinner on the patio. Watched a little tv, J had gone to bed as he has to get up early for his work week. At bedtime D said she would like to have some time with J so she went to his bedroom and they had another "round" so to speak....sounded like they had fun.....lol. Eventaully she came back to our bed and we slept the night away. All in all a great weekend. D and J are now able to openly profess their affection for each other (took him some time) and things seem good so far....hope they only get better from here as D is so happy and sastified it makes our life together better.
 
It is *so nice* to read your blog. You act like adults, share in each other's happiness. It's a beautiful thing. :)
 
reply to book bug

Thank you so much not only for reading but for the nice comment. We are at a point in our lives where this seems to make sense to us. So far it has been pretty good, not that there are no issues but pretty good none the less. In the last few weeks J has really come to enjoy our company on a different level and D is so content it is cool to see. She still is somtimes walking on egg shells after they are together sexually as she does not want to have it interfere with our relationship but she is getting over some of that as well. There are times I am somewhat jealous but not to the point it is a problem and seeing her happy is what brings me back to earth. We have gotten into another weekend and the day switch didn't work out like we thought it would so they spent the night together in his room last night. It worked out well and actually I have to admit I enjoyed hearing them together. Jealous.....maybe a small bit but it was also kinda hot I have to admit......lol. Both her and I worked today, he is gone with his daughter to a concert tonight and will either be home late tonight or he may stay at his daughters and be home tomorrow. We are both going to be glad to see him although for different reasons.....lol. They now are both saying the L word to each other so I don't see any stop signs in the near future at least. Will post more as it happens and thanks for reading.
 
This might one of the more positive blogs on the site, and I'm glad you're taking the time to write it. It's not an exaggeration when I say it's an absolute pleasure to see people posting here who aren't in the middle of a crisis, or suffering some kind of self-absorbed preoccupation with themselves. This site occasionally reads like a self-inflicted abuse novel, so its great to see something more hopeful. Good luck and keep posting!!! :)
 
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Been a couple of weeks since the last post

Well we have been busy so I haven't posted like I thought I would here. An update to our life so far. D and I had a nice vacation last week going to a nice quiet part of the state. Left sunday and got back friday of the same week. That gave J and D their friday night together both weeks that they love so much and I am happy to give it to them as they both seem happy to have it. This last week we came back home on friday afternoon and went to a get together with some old friends for a nice evening. J was actually home when we left but was going to visit family for a few hours while we were gone. Got back around 11 and I gathered my things to go to our other house as J was on his way home, we actually passed eachother on the way.....lol. They had a fantastic night together according to D as they had missed some of the previous weekend. I was told they went pretty much stright to bed that night having wonderful sex and sleeping curled up together. They went to breakfast the next morning before J left to see his daughter and son for the day. D was all smiles when I got back and thanked me for a great end to our vacation. Saturday was busy with lawn and gardening that had been neglected for the week while we were gone and by the time J got back we were done for the day. We sat, talked and enjoyed time over a couple of drinks before D and I went to bed for the night. Sunday J's son was there and more things got done around out place. J had to leave for work in the evening instead of the late night/early morning time that he normally leaves in so we said our good byes he is gone for another week. Got a funny thing about the week before on friday though.....J was home on thursday that week and they spent the night together since I was gone for the night on business. I got back friday night and I guess I forgot that it was actually friday due to the trip. Went upstairs to get in bed as I had talked to D the day before and she said she would be in bed when I got back and see me then or in the morning. Since I had lost track I just went up to bed and opened the door to find J and D cuddled up together....kinda not expecting it and stood there for a minute before thinking....it is friday isn't it.......lol. They looked so peacfull and happy I just closed the door and went back downstairs. We all had a good laugh about it the next day. Just thought I would share. Hope everyone that reads is doing well and I will post again soon.
 
Wow guess it has been a while since a post.

Hello to anyone who has followed my postings here....it has been a while with all the summer stuff going on. For those interested in our life here are a few updates. D and I are doing well, her "other husband" J is also well and seems happy with the whole relationship. J and I remain friends and are still getting along well and I believe he is becoming more settled into the poly life. They still spend friday together most every week and also get some time sunday evening before J leaves for work. He has a few times come back from his week away at work early and we work out that extra time as it happens so things seem good. D and I were on vacation for a week this last week so their friday was speical since the next one they would not be together. D said J is much more affectionate since getting more settled when they are out in public and very attentive in the bedroom. They slept in on saturday morning before we went on vacation and after getting packed and ready to go they said their goodbye's. We were off for a great week just D and I and had a nice relaxing vacation that included lots of fun touring, great food and great sex together. While we did not want to come back until sunday J and D missed eachother so we came home 1 day early on this last saturday. We had "talked" by text and a couple of phone calls to arrange for J to be home saturday evening when we came into town so that D and J could go on a nice date and then have the house to themselves for the night. I have to say D was all smiles around J who didn't understand it was just the 2 of them on the date ( guess we just said go out and he thought it was the 3 of us). Anyway off they went, D said they had a great dinner then to a local event for a while. I made myself scarce for the night giving them the night for whatever. D said they cuddled up for a bit but soon were off to bed for a "great night" so she says making love and then cuddle time with some serious chat about making this a perminant thing. J is all for it although still grasping the whole poly thing....lol. D and I had talked about her and J going for a whole weekend somewhere and he is all for it as well so looks like that will happen in the near future. I still sometimes have a hard time with the whole attention and jelious monster but deal with it very well. 99% of the time I am both happy for D and find the whole thing hot but have had to admit it is hard that small part of the time although even that is going away as D is very supportive of my feelings and I am supportive of both hers and J's so I would say all is well in our poly life at the moment.....more in the future.:)
 
Thanks for the update!

It's good to read about another successful MFM Vee. I remember being on tenterhooks for the first 6 months or so (I am the hinge) - and wondering if I was doing "okay" meeting everyone else's needs. It was a bit nerve-wracking - but the boys were so good about talking things out that I was able to calm down and really appreciate the "new normal." An important step for me was really internalizing "fair" =/= "equal" - that it is important for each individual to get what they need and that is not necessarily the same for each person. (Dude needs more cuddles and physical affection, MrS needs more quality conversations and non-physical intimacy.)

We all live together full-time - and have since the inception of our Vee (which is often frowned upon here - but worked for us). Actually, since I am the only one who works outside the house, the boys see more of each other than I do of either of them. So, I think our situation is working so well because they where already best friends before the Vee coalesced. They really care about each other (in a platonic way) and want each member of the Vee to be happy and fulfilled.

I have yet to have a weekend "away" with Dude - this is mainly because I am such a "home-body". Although we have had some days/weekends/longer "home" alone together, and have had vacations "away" with all three of us. (And ... I am planning on taking him away for a surprise weekend as a present when he finishes a long-term project he has been working on for me - MrS is fully supportive of this ...Shhhh - don't tell;))

Oh - I didn't mean for this to turn out so long. Just wanted to say thanks for the update and that I am so excited for all of you - sounds like you are doing just fine!

JaneQ

PS. If I recall correctly, your wife doesn't post here? If she ever wants another "hinge" to talk to - feel free to PM me and I can share an email address.
 
Thanks for sharing sterling! Just wanted to let you know that I am following your blog!
 
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