You can read about my story here... http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=25643
So I had the talk with my hubby and it went okay for the first hour or so and then it just... didn't. I'm not sure where we derailed, but I when he made the comment 'so, you want to do this why? because it's exciting?' with a making fun of me tone that I knew it wasn't going to end well.
I ended up backing off and telling him I'd been thinking about it a lot because I've been writing about it (true, for my novel), and that it wasn't something I felt like I had to do. So I lied. I think. I don't know.
I mean, I know I want to be with more than one person for the rest of my life. But I also don't want to hurt him. And I don't want my 'wants' to tear our family apart (we have 2 kids).
I don't know what to do next. Help.
Maybe I should just tell him who I have a crush on and see how that goes? I mean, I was trying to ease him into it, but maybe he could feel I wasn't being fully open and so he got scared?
He said he doesn't need anyone else... well, for one thing I don't think he's right about that, and for another thing, I do need someone else, even if he doesn't.
So I had the talk with my hubby and it went okay for the first hour or so and then it just... didn't. I'm not sure where we derailed, but I when he made the comment 'so, you want to do this why? because it's exciting?' with a making fun of me tone that I knew it wasn't going to end well.
I ended up backing off and telling him I'd been thinking about it a lot because I've been writing about it (true, for my novel), and that it wasn't something I felt like I had to do. So I lied. I think. I don't know.
I mean, I know I want to be with more than one person for the rest of my life. But I also don't want to hurt him. And I don't want my 'wants' to tear our family apart (we have 2 kids).
I don't know what to do next. Help.
Maybe I should just tell him who I have a crush on and see how that goes? I mean, I was trying to ease him into it, but maybe he could feel I wasn't being fully open and so he got scared?
He said he doesn't need anyone else... well, for one thing I don't think he's right about that, and for another thing, I do need someone else, even if he doesn't.