is there a better word?

[SourGirl]

Originally Posted by Chimera

You're saying people should just accept uncomfortable words, word that make them feel less than? So you'd ask us to put up with a whole lot of hate words in this society right now? Personally I'm glad that we don't have to just get over it. It's not fear driving this or discomfort, it's anger, rejection, it's the fact that some people don't feel like they have to accept the logic behind those words.

"Secondary" has negative connotations of "less than" in our society. It does, it's not just personal "baggage." Why should anyone have to accept hierarchical language if they are working to not live their lives in that way? Hierarchy isn't "natural." We don't have to give in to rankings, competition, less than, more than. Language is incredibly important and I think AnnabelMore's question is a valid one.

Actually, what I 'said' is whats written, not your twist with hate included. I am included in the 'we' part. I am going to be a secondary or less to other partners. I don`t have a problem with being seen as such. I don`t feel 'less then' in a wrong way.
I do believe fear drives all these label changes.
Btw,...Where does anger come from ? Hmmm ?

The following thought is actually what prompted my opinion.

Think more along the lines of 'step-father' and its meaning in society.

In some families a step-father is a secondary role. It`s accepted, yet the man knows that he is a secondary role to the biological father.

In other families, the step-father is as equally important as the biological father. providing love, and needs on a equal level.

And yet, in other families, a step-father is a primary role.

By its very definition, 'step-father' does not men less then, it is simply a way to denote that A) not biological b) they came into the picture second.

For all the bad press that can happen for step-parents, I am glad that the 'title' has not been ' owhh there is negative press about us so we need to be labelled something else'. Once upon a time, the title DID have a negative meaning, as divorce was less common.

It seems time can heal a lot of wounds. We can change titles all we want, but its just running away from the time and work that society tends to need to do, before things have a positive spin.